I Feel Awful

[Meyou]

I think I just broke one of the childcare provider rules that I wasn't suppose to ever break. My 12 month old DCG walked across the room today for the first time here. She's only taken a step or two before. Mom told me last week that she'd taken her first steps so I was quite proud to share her lurch like run across the playroom with him. Until his face dropped and he told me she'd only taken one step twice. This was her first walk and they missed it. He looked heartbroken.

OMG I feel soooo awful. I apologized for ruining the moment for them and for misunderstanding his wife's words. I normally never share stuff like this unless I'm SURE so I don't ruin first's for parents.

[Michael]

This is a good thread on first time events: https://www.daycare.com/forum/showthread.php?t=30642

[sharlan]

Oh, I hate when that happens. We try so hard to make sure the parents get all the "firsts".

[littlemissmuffet]

I guess I'm the odd one out here, but I do tell about firsts! We make a big deal about them here. If moms and dads take offence, this is defnitely not the daycare for them.

[GretasLittleFriends]

Looking back, I experienced all of my son's firsts. I worked 12 hour shifts 3 or 4 days a week, so I had 3 or 4 day weekends. I have now come to realize that my daycare provider "let" me experience all of his firsts.

The dates in his baby book may not be exactly correct, but she was his "other mom". He even called her mom, and I really had mixed feelings about that. He spent as much time with her as he did me. I think I would have been bummed if I would have missed his first steps or his first word or his first... Though she did show me his first tooth then recommended teething tablets.

I think had I not experienced his "firsts" I would have felt kind of bad being gone from him all the time and not being able to watch him grow, even though I was with him 50% of his awake hours each week.

[Meyou]

That's exactly why I never tell unless I'm sure. Not to self: question new moms more closely in case they're being over zealous with what's happening at home.

[meganlavonnesmommy]

I always keep "firsts" to myself. I want them to think they didnt miss their firsts.
That being said, dont beat yourself up about telling the dad. I am sure they appreciate having a caregiver who is so excited about their childs milestones. Better than having one who could care less.
They will get to experience many other firsts.

[nannyde]

That's exactly why I never tell unless I'm sure. Not to self: question new moms more closely in case they're being over zealous with what's happening at home.

You just haven't learned to be fluent in "parent speak". Remember they are super new at raising kids so they are more likely to be very impressed when their child adds new skills. They have a tendency to call the development what is the "end game" of the development.

You will have them say the child can crawl when they can really only flip and scoot. They will say think they are able to know when they have to go potty when they tell them AFTER they have peed in their diaper. They will say their child knows their ABC's when they can sing the ABC song.

It takes time to decode it and figure out what they are really describing. Best to always say "he's getting really close". With walking I will sometimes have the kid "practice" going from me to mommy at pick up. I'll start a couple of steps back and have the kid Frankenwalk from me to the parent. That way we both see it at the same time. Then the next level is them bolting across the floor. They will tell me when that happens.

With really fun parents I will make bets with them on the date something is going to happen. When they are ten months old I will pick a date I think they will be able to walk. The parents pick a date and we have a bet. The winner is the All Supreme Knowing of the Universe. I like to be that. ::

We take bets on their height and weight before doc appointment... to the ounce. We bet on what word the kid will say first... I always bet for "NaNa". :: It usually is Da Da

I just try to make it fun so the "firsts" isn't such a big deal. When they tell me they were right and the kid did it at home I tell them I don't believe them if my date hasn't hit yet. I must see video confirmation.

Just try to keep it as light as possible and they will get used to it happening at both places.

[Meyou]

You just haven't learned to be fluent in "parent speak". Remember they are super new at raising kids so they are more likely to be very impressed when their child adds new skills. They have a tendency to call the development what is the "end game" of the development.

That's exactly what happened. They're super new parents who are amazed and totally in love with their new daughter. Who wouldn't be?? She's from that factory where they make those cute little girls. Now I know and I'll make sure to keep that in mind for the future.

She lurched across the room last night from one to the other so all is well in their world this morning. She did it again here from dad to my 7 year old at dropoff. I talked to Dad again this morning about it and he told me not to worry. They hadn't considered trying to get her to walk from one person to another so they were pleased that she did it for them last night. Phew!