Minnesota Shutdown Impact

[Blackcat31]

I agree some of these people should not being getting help but do we deny the children also? Then you have the hard working people or the ones that have lost jobs and can't find another good paying job. Some of these people were doing just fine before all this recession thing so until you walk in their shoes we shouldn't be judging.

Those are NOT the families I am talking about. I am talking about the ones who abuse and manipulate our system so they can get a free handout and NEVER have to be responsible. I am talking about the ones who never ever leave the system, even after generations of family members on it. I am talking about the parents who sit home and lie about job searching or the ones who do drugs, the ones who take vacations and drive fancy cars, the ones who get their nails done and dress their children like GAP ads. I am talking about the ones who continue to have children despite their already poor financial situation.

THOSE are the ones who have made it feel criminal for the ones you are talking about to even go in and ask for some assistance.

[dEHmom]

I've known 2 women whose husbands had vasectomy's and 15 yrs later all of a sudden they are pregnant, and yes, the husband was the father.

SOMETIMES birth control fails, they are all 99.9% effective but there is still that .1% chance. That is why they advise to double up.

We were very careful and ended up with a 3rd. But we made it work.

Friends of ours don't even own their own home, they have 3 kids, and neither of them work. They bounce from one home to another (living with their parents, aunts, uncles, etc) and they have ever new game system, every new movie, you get the picture. I don't know if they are on assistance or not because they've never said, and we've never asked. But I do know that they get ALOT more for child tax benefit and stuff because they have no income from previous years, and so they get the maximum. They get to go on trips, and it really irritates my dh and I because we both work our butts off, and can't afford to do anything. We stay home 99% of the time, and when we have to make extra trips to the city for any reason, that's gas money coming out of food money.

There are MANY families that need the help of assistance, and they rightfully deserve that. But because there are so many abusing the system, they may not be getting what they need. Do you know how long the wait list is for housing? 2 yrs! So a woman with a child who's husband is abusing her and or her child, has to wait 2 yrs before she can get into a place of her own. She has to bounce around in shelters with her child until she can get in. And then there are the people like I mentioned in the previous posts who have another baby every so many years so they can STAY in the system. I don't know how it is everywhere else, but here you have 5 yrs to get a job. 5 YRS! that's until your child is in school. So on year 4, pregnant again. It's disgusting and ridiculous.

[Unregistered]

I'm the OP #14

I never said I couldn't afford my child while in gradschool.

He was a wanted, intentional child and my assistanceship (a job in the program), which I worked while in the hospital within 6 hours of birth, was generous. If you have worked through a degree, and you want your master's degree - take the GRE and apply to programs with funding. Gradschool pays well and tuition paid out of your funding package is still tax deductible. Funding is merit based, so really, do do your homework.

Why should we be funding foreign countries while our own citizens go without? And really, people, I am not speaking of myself here.

I feel pretty strongly that we should support our neighbors and that paying a stranger to care for the children of families in need is just a way of punishing parents and feeding the machine. I also feel that job seeking should be assisted - not just reported, and that when we spend as much to support the domestic economy as we do overseas the discussions can begin.

We are borrowing from the world for a war effort that is ever expanding. We need to have our national priorities aligned with the survival of our children first and we need to honor parents by valuing their ability to raise their own children at least as well as a college drop out caring for five or more unrelated children.

(BTW - you don't have to drop out of college to raise a child, you just need a good childcare provider)

[Unregistered]

I am glad it has helped you get an education. I really am.

I also was a single mother of two, ironically my ex left when DS was an infant. I picked him , not the Government, it was not forced on me. It did not work out, I had to adjust. I understand how hard it is.

I put myself through school, created my own job so I could work AND care for my children without ANY assistance. I am also tired after 6pm, I also have to clean up after my kids every night after working 12 hour days.

My needs and personal fulfillment went to the back burner, I have kids and they come first. I made the decision to have them.

I had to live within my means. I don't understand how others cannot....:confused::confused:

What I really, really don't understand is why, after getting a job in management, you still need to be on the system that is supported by everyone elses taxes??? Please explain that to me.

I do not have the time, or the emotional energy to explain anything. I simply did a google search to find out how the government shutdown was affecting other moms in my position, and I found this blog. So I shared my story. I understand your being compelled to respond, however many of the points you responded with do not apply to me, my life or my post. Not to mention the condesending manner in which you made those points.

I am just a real person that this shutdown will affect. And I know, in my heart and mind, that I do not abuse or take for granted what help has been given to me. I am proud, confident that what I'm doing with the help that I'm getting is the right thing.

Although I am still on hands and knees, praying that the shutdown does not take place, I am grateful for the attention that this has brought to the subject. I have learned about myself, and others...some friends, and some strangers like you.

Thank you for your attention.

[Unregistered]

I think you have a great story and you sound like a good mom who is really trying to do right by your children (and yourself) to contribute to society and not abuse the system like so many others do. It is nice to hear these kinds of stories but I too wonder how come after working in a management position you are still needing assistance for childcare? Please do not say it is because child care is expensive because I am a childcare provider and techinically fall into the low-income bracket myself. I make less than some of the families I provide care for and although I do not apply for some of the services that are available to me, I do qualify.

I also find it rather odd that you are allowed to aquire a savings account while collecting assistance form the state which is tax payer dollars. I dream of a savings account, and retirement benefits, and health insurance, and any kind of benefits that most people who work recieve. Don't get me wrong, I am NOT complaining about the career I chose to work in and all the disadvantages that come with it (no paid sick/vacation/personal etc days). I just do not think that people recieving assistance should be allowed to smoke, drive expensive cars and or have a savings account while collecting dollars from other people who work just as hard!!

I do not have a savings account because I use those few "extra" dollars I have each month for medical expenses (my DH is an insulin diabetic), heat costs, food and general living and child care expenses RATHER than recieve any aid from the state. If I just collected assistance, I could use those extra dollars and amass quite a savings account instead. But I don't. I do not even get a tax refund. I pay money into the IRS each year because my DH and I are both self-employed.

I also completely understand the difficulties your children will have to endure if they cannot attend their childcare since most children do bond with their friends and caregiver, but I hope you do not think that your child care provider should just provide services for free while this whole shut-down is going on, because that would not be right at all. That is where the problem lies, IMHO, people are so concerned that the children are going to suffer the most by this (and I do think they will) but I have had many people act as if I am the one who is hurting them by NOT providing services to the families on assistance during this mess. As if it is somehow ME who is hurting the kids by saying I am not going to be paid so they cannot attend!?! :confused:

And dEHmom is right, every single one of my families on assistance smoke, drive cars newer than mine, have mnicured nails, own an iphone or blackberry their kids wear brand name clothing and they eat at McDonald's more than once a week! Several of the moms have one or more degrees that they earned and do not use. They have all taken vacations and 50% of the families I have on assistance have been to Disney Land (thanks to tax time!). To clarify, I am NOT saying all families on assistance are like this, I am onlytelling what I have personally seen in my decades of involvement with children, families and the assistance program.

I truely wish I had an answer that would fix this terribly flawed system of giving, spending, giving, spending but I have nothing. I do know that their does need to be some accountiblity with the families recieving assistance and there needs to be some rules and guidelines put into place. The system at its inception was for all the right reasons and yet today, many many generations later, the program is NOTHING in comparison to its original intentions. :confused:

If this shut down does occur, I will be out 85% of my income but I will NOT provide child care for FREE since I kinda feel like that is already what I do for a majority of these families.

What I meant by entire savings was the five hundred dollars I have tucked away incase of my car, which is not new and which I paid for on my own, breaking down. Or incase money gets really tight, and I can't buy diapers one week with my regular paycheck. It is there with my children in mind. I do not have a credit card or family member to bail me out. I can see how in my original post it sounded as if I had some sort of an "accruing savings account", but that is surely not the case. Also, I would never keep my kids in daycare without paying. I can afford to pay one week (savings), but that's all. Otherwise I'll stay home from work. But I do think it's sad that my provider would be out the income of two kids she was counting on being there. Everything happens for a reason. We will wait it out.

[Sugar Magnolia]

I saw the news today, oh boy....

My heart goes out to the children and providers in MN today. I hope its over very soon.

[Cat Herder]

I feel pretty strongly that we should support our neighbors

I also feel that job seeking should be assisted - not just reported,

I love those two statements.

I do volunteer work with a Womens group here that does just that. Clothing, hair, make-up and auto assistance (no public transportation option down here) for Mothers seeking employment. It was started by a local group of retiree's.

It is community based, not government based. We have Chicken-Q's, Bake Sales, Childrens Fairs, craft fairs, a food bank, etc...

They also have training classes on computers, typing, high school/ged, public speaking and other entry level skills. It is fantastic. These Women are built up, not disabled by fear of losing a check if they succeed.

If it were only that easy to solve in both directions.

Most Childcare providers are Mothers too. I am not representing the large centers, I represent those of us that keep 4-8 kids in general.

When we are forced to live off what minimal fees we can collect it effects our entire families. Most of us could probably qualify for the same assistance. It is a miserable cycle. We need to be able to support our kids, too. I guess that is the main point to all of this.

There are no winners with the system as it is. It just turns us against one another.

[Meeko]

My only comments on this subject is that the mis-use of the program by SOME of the parents of these small children is exsctly why we are in this position. Too many people treat welfare as a hand out and NOT a hand up like it should be. I have 75% of my families receiving state aid/assistance for their child care and they are ALL the first to drop off and the last to pick up. This is a time for people to stand up and be responsible and have some accountibility. I do feel bad for those who truely need this program and will undoubtedly suffer great financial hardships but honestly, in all my years of doing child care, I have only run across 1 or 2 of these families.

Our state needs to step up and make families accountible for their use and need of the program. Too many unemployed parents are using child care to job search when in reality they are sitting at home channel surfing instead. Too many loop holes.
When I notified my families of the possiblity of no services, every single one of them said some version of "Well, good thing I don't have a job yet." or "Well atleast, my boyfriend can watch him since he is home all day"!

Amen. Sounds exactly the same as my state parents. I tend 6 kids who's mother is on state assistance. They all have different fathers and she's never been married to any one of them. One month she made a little more money and ended up having to pay $160 out of her own pocket. That's $160 for SIX children for a whole month. She whined and complained and drove me and the other parents crazy. One dad stood behind her at pick up and pulled faces as she whined...I had a hard time keeping a straight face! This dad works two jobs to support his family, since his wife walked out on him and the kids for someone she worked with. He makes $30 a month too much for state assistance with day care. So he pays for his two kids himself and his taxes support Miss Promiscuous Whiner. Seems so unfair.

[Meeko]

I am a sigle mom of two kids. I do receive child care assistance in which I am so grateful for. I have a good job and do not receive any other assistance including child support. I pay my own rent, buy my own food, I don't even receive discounts for school lunches. I am very proud to be independent but again, am grateful for the child care assistance. While I completely agree that changes have to be made, how about we start with drug testing to receive any kind of government assistance? I'm betting that could save us a lot of money!!

I so agree with this. Many employers do random drug tests. Fail...and out you go. Should be the same for benefits.

I hate the thought that my hard earned tax dollars are going to support junkies. I even hate the thought that my money buys cigarettes for a huge majority of welfare recipients.....

[Blackcat31]

I am a sigle mom of two kids. I do receive child care assistance in which I am so grateful for. I have a good job and do not receive any other assistance including child support. I pay my own rent, buy my own food, I don't even receive discounts for school lunches. I am very proud to be independent but again, am grateful for the child care assistance. While I completely agree that changes have to be made, how about we start with drug testing to receive any kind of government assistance? I'm betting that could save us a lot of money!!

THAT is where most of the problem lies. Child Support is NOT assistance. It shouldn't be included in that area. It should be a responsibility and more effort needs to go towards ensuring these children with deadbeat parents are getting what they rightfully deserve. BOTH parents need to take responsibilty for their offspring.

OP, I am NOT directing this AT you but WITH you....you shouldn't have to collect child care assistance if you receive child support. I feel for you that you are forced to participate with the assistance program to make sure your children are taken care of when the responsibilty should not lie with the tax payers or the state but with your childs' other parent.

You sound like a hardworking parent who is doing the best you can with the situation you are in, however, I feel the state dollars that are devoted to some of the welfare programs we have would be better spent trying to enforce the collection of child support for families like yours who are in financial need of the assistance because of someone else's decision not to parent and take responsibilty for their child(ren).

[Michelle]

One of my former parents lived in her 3 bedroom 2 bath house for about $100 a month thanks to hud.
She got free childcare thanks to calworks
She got her house cleaned for free because dpss thought she was at high risk for child abuse/neglect so they gave her benefits for that too,(family preservation program) among other benefits such as cash aid, food stamps, bus fair, and college education ( but she dropped out)

now she has decided to become a sahm

I do believe in childcare funding, but I just think all the help she got was ridiculous. Probably the house cleaning ticks me off the most for some reason.
My hands hurt every night from all the cleaning I do all day.

[Unregistered]

...this makes me livid....and sad :-(

One of my former parents lived in her 3 bedroom 2 bath house for about $100 a month thanks to hud.
She got free childcare thanks to calworks
She got her house cleaned for free because dpss thought she was at high risk for child abuse/neglect so they gave her benefits for that too,(family preservation program) among other benefits such as cash aid, food stamps, bus fair, and college education ( but she dropped out)

now she has decided to become a sahm

I do believe in childcare funding, but I just think all the help she got was ridiculous. Probably the house cleaning ticks me off the most for some reason.
My hands hurt every night from all the cleaning I do all day.

That is a lot of help! I'm really disgusted that housekeeping was included there....pathetic. My hands hurt too!!! but I do it all. I raised my daughter basically alone after a yucky divorce...and while working two jobs (one full and one part time). I did get child support (a whopping $192.00 month) but no assistance. I walked quite far to the daycare each day then took public transportation to work because I had no car...I didn't get bus fare from anyone. This all makes me sick all of the help these people get. Some really need it but the ones I see out and about and especially in front of me in line at the grocery store do not need all of this aid! Sorry to rant and vent....I feel better now. Enjoy the long weekend. I'm sure many of us will spend a chunk of it cleaning!!!

[Unregistered]

(I'm a different unregistered person- my name is Amy)

I realize that 99% of the people on this board hate 'welfare leaches,' etc... because of their own financial problems or stereotypes or whatever attitude they have regarding public assistance...

But without child care assistance, I cannot continue to go to work so that I can pay my rent (which I pay at market rate with my earned wages), pay for food (which I pay for at the grocery store with my earned wages), gas for my car (which I pay for with earned wages in order to get to/from work), or medical insurance for my family (a plan offered through my work that I pay for with my earned wages).

What I'm getting at is that as a single parent, I work hard to provide for my family. I have a pretty good full time job, and it does pay well considering the area we live in, and I *want* to provide for my family on my own. If it were financially possible, I'd be more than happy to pay for child care on my own. Being on child care assistance certainly isn't something I'm proud of - to me, it's a necessity. I am at risk of losing my job because of the government shut down. If my child care center isn't able to work with me regarding payment arrangements (paying about $200/month in addition to my regular copay until I'm paid off), I will be forced to leave my job. And my job isn't something that I can just come back to when the government is back up and running - I'll have to find a new one, which will likely take time.

I do not know anyone who is available to watch my two children during the day. ALL of my friends and family in this area work full time jobs, because of course that would be my first course of action.

So... If I end up losing my job because of this, my family will have no income. That means we can apply for cash, food, medical assistance, and instead of being able to provide those things for my family ON MY OWN, the government (aka taxpayers) can handle it for me. Fan-stinking-tastic. I can't think of ANYONE who would want this. How stupid can politicians be? I can see shutting down child care assistance for people who aren't working - but for people who work and are at risk of losing EVERYTHING, child care IS ESSENTIAL.

Others can be judgmental about my situation until they're blue in the face- but judgment doesn't build anything - and my goal is to build a good life for my family. "You shouldn't have gotten pregnant if you can't afford to raise a child," - no one is perfect. At this point, all I can do is continue to work, continue to provide what I can for my family, and build a successful career so that I will never again need to rely on public assistance of any type.

[nannyde]

So... If I end up losing my job because of this, my family will have no income. That means we can apply for cash, food, medical assistance, and instead of being able to provide those things for my family ON MY OWN, the government (aka taxpayers) can handle it for me.

Are you saying you are providing their medical NOW?

Are you receiving child support from their father? If not, is he being prosecuted for that?

Two kids in day care is a HUGE cash subsidy to parents. In the end, it would be cheaper for the tax payers to give you food stamps, medical for your kids, and rent assistance.

It's time to do what my auntie did when she was a young mother. She took care of her friends kids while they worked and they took care of her kids while she worked. They did it for YEARS.

Have you looked into sharing child care between you and another family?

There was a day not so long ago when the idea of paying for day care wasn't even in the mind of the American people. They made it work between each other. They worked opposite shifts and cared for kids when they weren't at work.

Have you thought about moving in with another young family and living really small and sharing child care and expenses?

There are ways to do this but it won't net you a place to live on your own and free time when you are off of your job. When taxpayers are paying for child care THAT'S what they are paying for you. They are paying for the free time you have off after work and your ability to live as a single household.... NOT for the care of the kids. The free care of the kids nets these.

Your response is "do the taxpayers want to have to pay for *** for me instead". My response is: That's not the alternative you should be looking at. You think you are owed that as an alternative. How about the alternative is that YOU make it all happen?

Could the alternative be: Share your home with another family... another young mother or mother and father who have to work to support their kid. YOU share a bedroom with your two kids and give up their bedrooms to a family who can come in and share the rent and the child care work. You live in a small teeny tiny space with your kids and they do too. When one of you goes to work the other cares for ALL the kids. When you cook you cook for EVERYONE and share the advantage of low cost home cooked meals made in bulk. Combine resources so that you don't have to ask for anything. Show us what you are made of instead of showing us what you are saving us.

Live small.... be willing to work while you are not at work. Gather together as a community of friends and family and make it work.

Go old school.... do what our foremothers did... that's complete self reliance. Never stop after the Dad of the kids to do his share in money and CARE of the kids.

Stop telling the taxpayers it could be worse.... take all the "free" out of your head and see if YOU can make it happen on your own. Free child/near free care is not a right. It's a huge luxury that buys you the ability to live as a single family and not have to work on your off times from your job.

[Michelle]

I think women should charge a $10,000 child support deposit before having sex .

Maybe there will be less dead beat dads! ::::::

If only we could actually make this work!