Some Parents Will Do Anything... (Vent)

[AfterSchoolMom]

To avoid payday.

I have one DCP who finds some way to avoid face to face contact with me EVERY SINGLE Friday.

The child has a friend in the neighborhood, and so a lot of Fridays they get off the bus and go directly to the friend's house (with permission). At the beginning of the year it was no biggie, they'd just stop by in the evening with payment. Fast forward to the last couple of months...

Mom either stays in the car when the child is here and calls them on the cell phone (yes, the cell phone...a topic for another post) to come out, or parks at the friend's house and sends the child on foot to collect whatever items are here, etc.

Last week, I wrote a note and gave it to the child to give Mom - "Your payment is due today. I will be home until X time, and I expect payment to be brought back this evening or the late fee will be charged". Not only did I not get payment that day, but on Monday the child strolls in with money...NO LATE FEE, no face to face with Mom. Haven't seen her in person all week, even after asking the child repeatedly to tell her that I need to see her, sending an email, AND leaving a VM.

Today it's Friday again, and this morning the child comes in and says "Mom said I should get off the bus and go right to "X's" house without coming here to drop my stuff off first". Yeah, I bet she did.

I have to laugh at this point though, because it's so ridiculous that it's almost funny. Just a couple more weeks, then school's out and I have a blissfull three months off from all of this garbage.

To clarify: For those of you who aren't aware, I do SA care. This child is in the 4th grade, so I'm not just letting a 4 year old wander around the neighborhood. I'm not responsible for the child when they're at the friend's house, per Mom and our contract.

[Meeko]

I think the mom is trying to skate these last few weeks of care and hoping you will drop chasing her once school is out! She is stealing your services because she thinks you can't do anything once the child is in your care and she's is gone.

We have covered situations like this in our licensing meetings. If the mom drops off dcb and takes off before you can talk to her, you have a legal right to call the police and they will consider it abandonment.

Send a note home with the child....leave a voicemail if you can etc. letting her know what will happen if she avoids you again. I can pretty much bet she'll only ever do it once......

[momma2girls]

Have her pay on Monday, the first day of the week. Then you are covered for the week you watch her.

[Crystal]

Personally, I would inofrm Mom that you require face to face with the parent every single day that the child is in care, even if it's for five minutes. I could never work with/for a family that I did not have the opportunity to speak directly with daily.

In this case, I'd MAIL a termination notice, effective immediatley. I'd include in the letter any fees, including late fees, that are due, give her a specific date to have it paid by with the warning that if it not recieved, in full, by that date, that you will move forward with legal action. She is completely disrespecting you, being rude and inconsiderate and does not care about you or your need to take care of your own family, why should you care for hers?

What a piece of work.

[momma2girls]

Personally, I would inofrm Mom that you require face to face with the parent every single day that the child is in care, even if it's for five minutes. I could never work with/for a family that I did not have the opportunity to speak directly with daily.

In this case, I'd MAIL a termination notice, effective immediatley. I'd include in the letter any fees, including late fees, that are due, give her a specific date to have it paid by with the warning that if it not recieved, in full, by that date, that you will move forward with legal action. She is completely disrespecting you, being rude and inconsiderate and does not care about you or your need to take care of your own family, why should you care for hers?

What a piece of work.

I agree with this as well.

[boysx5]

yes paying up front is the only way to go no pay no care

[Mom_of_two]

I also agree with the term letter. If not that at the least, payment up front or no care!!! Please keep us posted!

[AfterSchoolMom]

Would you really term two weeks before the end of the school year though?

[daycare]

I know to each thier own, but I would never allow for a child to come up to my house without supervision of an adult and having a parent face to face each day.

What if the child does not come into the house and the parent leaves before watching the child go into the house. Now you have an issue on your hands. The child is in your responsibility and you don't even have the child.

I had something like this happen to me several years ago when I was coaching youth soccer. I had an all boys team age 10. One of the parents dropped of their kid at the side gate, instead of dropping them off on the field like I had asked. The parent leaves and the boy takes off and hides behind a handball court. I just thought that he was not coming to practice that day, beacause I never saw him. A little different than DC, so I didnt call the parents to see if the kid was coming.

About 45 min later I see his dad on the field, as I am wrapping up the practice. All of the kids are cleaning stuff up when the dad comes over and says where is billy. I look at the dad and say um what, Billy was not here today. So he calls the mom right away on the cell and the dad tells me, well mom dropped him off today at practice so what do you mean he's not here.
The dad gets crazy on me and some of the kids got scared and even told the dad yeah billy was not here today. So dad calls the police.
turns out that little billy had gone over to the handball court a very large wall far from where our soccer practice was held and was playing hand balls with some boys the whole time. The parents tried to get me fired, but I could not be responsible for parents that did not follow the rules so I didnt get fired.

The soccer league started making people check their kids in and out just like in DC after that happened.

I would require this form of sign in and sign out so that it requires them to come into the home to drop their child off.

Since you only have a few weeks left I would let the DCM know that the child cannot return to care until ALL fees have been paid in full....this includes late fees.

[MG&Lsmom]

It sounds to me like the family has a perfect FREE afterschool care already set with the friend's family. She's trying finish the school year without having to pay you, hoping that the free friend situation works out but trying to keep you as her fall back if/when the friend's mom has had enough or is not available. I would term effective immediately, send that letter certified and go after them for payments owed. I might even have my door locked when they show up Monday morning . The year is ending anyway, start advertising for a new family for the Fall.

[kimsdaycare]

Honestly, I wouldn't term with 2 weeks left of school. Knowing me, I wouldn't term even if were longer off. I would address the manipulation though. She is avoiding you on Fridays so that she can pay you on Mondays instead. She is sending cash with dd, to avoid the late fee and confrontation about being late. So in essence she isn't trying to get free daycare, she trying to change her due date by several days and avoid the fee. Still not good, but not the worst one I've ever seen.

I'd call her and tell her I noticed that she seems to need an adjustment to her tuition due date and I have no problem with it at all so long as she tosses in the appropriate fees whenever she needs to do this to be fair to the other parents who are required to do so when the same happens to them. Also, you really would prefer her to hand payment directly to you as it is awkward when the fees are accidentally left out - which you are sure she doesn't mean to do purposely btw Children can and do take money at times, you will be sure to check the amount and let her know if it is shorted if for some reason she still feels the need to send it with dd occasionally.

Her tuition just went up and she gets a few extra days to pay, win win! By setting up a protocol that you WILL contact her if short, she may avoid the situation in the first place, especially if she will need care come September. At that point she'd be put on the prepay plan if this is still a problem.

[SandeeAR]

I only do payment by prepay on Monday morning. I also require an adult sign in and sign out the child EACH day. This is per my CPA, how said this is the best way to prove my hours to the IRS.

[AfterSchoolMom]

I only do payment by prepay on Monday morning. I also require an adult sign in and sign out the child EACH day. This is per my CPA, how said this is the best way to prove my hours to the IRS.

I'm thinking of implimenting BOTH of those things for next year. It really seems like Friday is hard for people to remember. It'll be easier to enforce "no pay, no stay" as well.

[SandeeAR]

I only do payment by prepay on Monday morning. I also require an adult sign in and sign out the child EACH day. This is per my CPA, how said this is the best way to prove my hours to the IRS.

I'm thinking of implimenting BOTH of those things for next year. It really seems like Friday is hard for people to remember. It'll be easier to enforce "no pay, no stay" as well.

If payment is not made on Monday morning, I give them until that evening at pick up. BUT, I have great parents. They always pay on time. If I ever had touble with a parent, and payment was not made by Monday evening, they would be told "If payment is not made first thing Tuesday morning, the child cannot stay until payment is made".

[AfterSchoolMom]

If payment is not made on Monday morning, I give them until that evening at pick up. BUT, I have great parents. They always pay on time. If I ever had touble with a parent, and payment was not made by Monday evening, they would be told "If payment is not made first thing Tuesday morning, the child cannot stay until payment is made".

With the parents that I have, if I did it that way they'd just start paying on Monday evening as a matter of course.