Are We Different

[ammama]

I'm really lucky, but I don't feel that way. I only take older dck's right now (2-5 year olds) so no babies, except my own newborn who is due any day. I plan my activities in the daycare to do things my own kids love to do, and the dck's that I have had for the last 2 years are like extended family. My older DD is homeschooling next year, which I'm really looking forward to - it seems like school takes up so much of her time! I also take Fridays off to spend with just my own kids, so only have dck's 4 days a week.

One of the reasons I did this was to spend time with my own children when they were young. I won't give that up!

[boysx5]

I feel like sometimes as soon as daycare is done I am off running my boys somewhere but I feel if I worked outside the home I would be even more stressed. I am able to start dinner get laundry done clean up and be here for my kids when they walk through the door after school. I need to work to make it for our family so all in all this is the best choice. Sometimes I don't get enough time for myself but its what mom's do for our kids. Plus my husband is a big help so that is the reason I do this.

[Country Kids]

I have loved reading everyones replies! Nannyde to answer your questions no I really can't be doing things while the children are here. With the group I have I really need to stay with them at all times. My computor is in my schoolroom and one of them has discovered the mouse and I'm constently on them about leaving it alone and that is with me right there-imagine if I left. There is a couple I even have to take with me when I go make lunch. My kitchen is right by the room but you never know what will happen.

Also, during naptime I help my one daughter that homeschools with any questions/assignments that she might have. We are actually thinking of having her go to school because I'm not able to give the time into homeschooling that I would like with the dck here. She has done it for about 6 years and its just getting to hard.

I'm not a newbie at this either-15 years. I just feel that as my children are getting older and not involved here in the childcare because they are at school that they are just pushed to the back. I'm up and making breakfast at 5:30, they get up at 6:00 and eat while I get ready. They all start getting ready and then I have kids get here. Both of my older ones go to school at 7:00 and get home between 2;45-3:15. I have children here till 5:30 most days. 3 of my children are involved with evening activities which is done this week but will be gone from 5:00-7:30 and my husband takes them because he is involved as a coach with this. So while he is gone with them I do dinner, laundry, clean up, paperwork, etc. I think what is frustrating to me is the dcp don't have to worry what their houses look like, no extra paper work to do, etc. because they don't have a people in and out of their houses all day.

Before I picked up 2 of my dck that arrive around 6:30 I would clean from 6:30-8:30 in the morning and then again for an hour or so in the evening. I can't leave the room though anymore because of their age and they are needing to be supervised constantly.

I know a couple of my own children will say "its all about daycar not us" because I'm always dealing with childcare issues even when I'm off.

Yes, my kids like having me home but I'm not home for them really because I'm still working. One of my children needed picked up from school (elementary) after staying after for a function and I was to pick him up. Parent that was suppose to be picking up an hour earlier texted me 15 min before I was to pick up soon and said I will be there in 30 min. I had no way to go get my son because of carseat issues. Luckily I was able to get a ride for him but he won't stay after anymore because he is afraid of being left at the school.

Thanks for listening everyone! Just having a sounding board helps with the days we put in.

[QualiTcare]

quality time is better than quantity of time IMO. with my current situation there are days that i'm home with my kids ALL DAY (on days i don't work or have class) but i don't DO anything with my kids because i'm busy doing homework, doing laundry, cleaning the house, etc. then there are days (like today) where my daughter went to her summer program and my son went to his grandma's while i was in school, but when we did get home i went outside and jumped on the trampoline with them, cooked on the grill and REALLY listened to them talk, etc. i'm pretty sure they enjoyed today where we only had a few hours together but it was truly spent TOGETHER than they do the days when we're at home all day together, but i'm preoccupied.

this is why i cringe a little when i see people assuming that parents who work and have their children in care don't spend any time with them, blah blah. even though they may only have five hours every evening during the week, you don't know HOW they spend that time with their children. on the weekend when providers might be doing "work" for the daycare - shopping, cleaning, etc., parents might be at the zoo or at the park, etc. it's just a silly assumption IMO.

[WImom]

My boys are 9 & 11, my daughter is 3. She spends the day doing daycare with me, so that's tons of face time, but my boys see me for a bit over breakfast and then they disappear til bus time. Same after school -- they come in just as I'm taking the dc kids outside for outdoor play & pick-up time. So they pretty much disappear into their room or go out and play with their friends til dinner. We eat dinner together every night, whether it's home-cooked or delivery, and then we usually end up going separate ways in the evening (extra-curriculars, homework with one parent or the other, or playing outside with their friends). So all in all, I don't think I actually have any more face-time with my kids than the dc parents have with theirs.

I very strongly believe, however that there is a HUGE difference in the fact that I am working at home. My kids know that I'm always available if they ever really need me. If they're sick at school, I'll be home to take the call. They won't be locked out at the end of a school day, and they won't be coming home to an empty house. And their friends know it too. We're one of the only families where a parent is home after school (among my boys' friends).

Personally I think it's "quantity time" that's more valuable than "quality time". Having a parent always available to a kid is a huge advantage (I believe) to their sense of security and to their sense of family too. Anyway, JMHO

This is the same with my family now that my 2 kids are in school full time. I will say to those that have young ones at home, for me anyways, it has gotten alot easier now that my kids are at school. I feel like I'm at 'work' and then I'm closed soon after my kids are at home from school. I has been hard though since I do have to miss some things. My younger ones seems to be affected more though.

[SimpleMom]

LIKE

Good mommy!

I would give up a lot to have just one day with each of my school aged children when they were young like yours.

Love it! I'm the same way, and I get the same response. You are doing great. A very good mommy

[SimpleMom]

Oops, I was trying to quote the gal that gets feedback from family on how attached her kids are to her