Not Sure How to Handle This Situation...

[PeanutsGalore]

While I totally understand about the long days cutting into family time and being exhausted at the end of the day, I'm not sure I understand the overall issue. Is she still using the contracted 40 - 45 hours per week and keeping her kids home on Fridays, or is she going over 45 hours/week? It seems she's using the extra hours on a daily basis because she needs to work, not go out to get her nails done. I'd make allowances for her too, if I could, and I'd probably up the weekly fee a minimum amount to cover the extra hours at night.

I know it would be nice to get a heartfelt thanks every once in awhile, but as long as I get paid on time, I think that's thanks enough. She's probably burnt out and exhausted too, especially if she's a single mom. Maybe she's just not thinking clearly enough to give you extra thanks, or maybe she's using every ounce of energy she has to keep her kids clean and fed, and get back to work her next 12-hour shift.

If you feel unappreciated, let her go. If you're willing to work with her though, I wouldn't think of it as a "favor". Explain to her that you have to up your prices to cover the daily overtime rate (even though she's not using extra hours in the week) and ask for enough to make you feel, well, appreciated.

[NiNi.R.]

While I totally understand about the long days cutting into family time and being exhausted at the end of the day, I'm not sure I understand the overall issue. Is she still using the contracted 40 - 45 hours per week and keeping her kids home on Fridays, or is she going over 45 hours/week? It seems she's using the extra hours on a daily basis because she needs to work, not go out to get her nails done. I'd make allowances for her too, if I could, and I'd probably up the weekly fee a minimum amount to cover the extra hours at night.

I know it would be nice to get a heartfelt thanks every once in awhile, but as long as I get paid on time, I think that's thanks enough. She's probably burnt out and exhausted too, especially if she's a single mom. Maybe she's just not thinking clearly enough to give you extra thanks, or maybe she's using every ounce of energy she has to keep her kids clean and fed, and get back to work her next 12-hour shift.

If you feel unappreciated, let her go. If you're willing to work with her though, I wouldn't think of it as a "favor". Explain to her that you have to up your prices to cover the daily overtime rate (even though she's not using extra hours in the week) and ask for enough to make you feel, well, appreciated.

I realize that she is exhausted from being a single mom...that is why I do the things I do for her. For the most part I get along very well with her and her children. More often than not she uses around 50 hours of childcare a week.I just feel sometimes that she continues to keep her children with me past 6 because its easier instead of trying to find another alternative first and it is very frustrating. Most of the time her schedule is sporadic and I find out an hour before her scheduled pick up time that she needs me to keep them longer. It is hard for me to make evening plans because neither I nor her know when she will get off work very much in advance. After reading everyone's comments and checking older threads I have decided that I'm going to implement a $10.00 fee if I'm not contacted ahead of time for schedule changes. I'm also going to talk to her face to face and tell her that I don't mind helping her out but I prefer she uses me keeping her children late as a last ditch effort.

I'd really like to work with her. Like I said I bend the rules more for her than others because I understand the situation she is in can get tough.

[sharlan]

Would it be possible for her to ask her employer to give her a 3 hour (or whatever works for you) notice? If she explained that her provider required notice, they might be able to come to an arrangement that would work for you.

[NiNi.R.]

Would it be possible for her to ask her employer to give her a 3 hour (or whatever works for you) notice? If she explained that her provider required notice, they might be able to come to an arrangement that would work for you.

I've thought of that also. In fact my husband worked there for a number of years and I know the boss. I thought about calling her myself and explaining the situation to her. I have a feeling that she would understand where I'm coming from. I also wonder if DCM has used daycare as an excuse to get out of work in unnecessary circumstances. I'm just not sure if I contact her employer and discuss it if it's overstepping a boundry.

[sharlan]

I think calling her boss would way over step your boundaries. It's her job, she needs to deal with it.

[NiNi.R.]

Yeah you are right. I suppose it was just a thought. What I need to do is grow a back bone::..that would solve this whole situation and anything else that would arise.

[PeanutsGalore]

Yeah you are right. I suppose it was just a thought. What I need to do is grow a back bone::..that would solve this whole situation and anything else that would arise.

Well good for you for being a kind soul. Now, take that kindness and apply it to yourself! I'm sure your family will be happy to either have you back at the end of the day or have the extra money to do something special every once in awhile if you decide to keep her. I don't like feeling taken advantage of either, so I understand that and I'm glad you're going to handle it. I'd offer to loan you my backbone, but it's still growing.