Was I Wrong

[daycare]

I have a rule in my house that all children must stay seated druing meal times until finished. I think this is quite normal. This means no walking around with the food, up and down out of seat and so on

I have a DCB that just turned 2 and has been able to sit a the big kid table for the last month. Does pretty good, but the last few days, he is flipping over his chiar, standing up, walking around with food and the list goes on

I told both parents that this has been an issue and that DCB will need to sit back in the highchair.

So this morning at drop as dcd and dcb are walking in the door i pull out the highchair. its a really nice chair and is not a typical baby seat. Infact my 3.5 year old still likes to sit in it from time to time..

DCD walks right by me and put DCB at the table with the rest of the kids. I tell DCD not sure if you remember, but he needs to be in the highchair until he can get used to staying seated again.

DCD says No way, thats not going to happen. He is not a baby and we don't have him in a Highchair at home..So I go on to tell DCD " I cant have him walking around with food, it's not allowed here"

Of course dcd says well he doesnt do that at home....

Ok well he does it here, along with other things and i am not ok with it. He needs to sit in the highchair.

Dcd says your treating him like a baby and i don't approve of it...hands me dck and leaves pissed off..

As soon as dad leaves I put the DCB in the highchair. DCB could not care less about where he sits.

am I wrong for having dcb sit in the high chair? Am I making it seem like he is a baby?

Did i go about this the wrong way?

[SilverSabre25]

I'm going to say that you are right in the rule, right in the way to handle this problem, but wrong in how you went about it.

The dcps don't need to know where he's sitting at your house. This is something that needs to be handled strictly at your house and the parents don't need to know about it or have anything to do with it. Whether or not he's allowed to walk around with food at home has NO bearing on what goes on at your house.

Don't make an issue of it; just do what you do the way you do it. The parents DON'T need to know about it.

[daycare]

I'm going to say that you are right in the rule, right in the way to handle this problem, but wrong in how you went about it.

The dcps don't need to know where he's sitting at your house. This is something that needs to be handled strictly at your house and the parents don't need to know about it or have anything to do with it. Whether or not he's allowed to walk around with food at home has NO bearing on what goes on at your house.

Don't make an issue of it; just do what you do the way you do it. The parents DON'T need to know about it.

sorry I was trying to make it a quick post ...
I should have mentioned that the yesterday when parents came to pick up we were eating PM snack and DCB was in teh highchair... they asked why he was sitting there and I told them why...

I guess i should not have said anything this morning and just waited until the dad left to move the DCB????

[SilverSabre25]

sorry I was trying to make it a quick post ...
I should have mentioned that the yesterday when parents came to pick up we were eating PM snack and DCB was in teh highchair... they asked why he was sitting there and I told them why...

I guess i should not have said anything this morning and just waited until the dad left to move the DCB????

ah gotcha, the clarification helps.

I don't know if you *should* have waited, but definitely wait in the future. Or just take dcb from dcd and say bye, then place dcb where you want him.

Sounds like a power trip thing on dcd's part though. Who cares whether their kid is in a high chair, a booster, or nothing at all? It's just a seat at the table and a means to get food in the tummy...

[safechner]

No, you are doing right thing. I have a 2 year old dcg that will not sit still on the table and I put her in the highchair which she don't like it. She have to learn to sit still until she eats all or most. I am not allowed dck walk around with foods.

To me, I don't believe his father that he don't do that at home. Yeah, right!

[Meeko]

I would conference with the parents and gently explain that what works at home doesn't work at day care.

I ask the parents to multiply whatever they expect from me by 16 kids and see how workable it seems then.....they (usually) see my point.

The parents need to understand that maybe they think one 2 year old wandering around with food at your house is not a big deal. But if you let their son do it....you have to let the other kids do it. Now you have food mashed all over your house......stick to your rule. If he can't sit still, he must be in a high chair.

For some reason parents act as if their kid is the only one in care.....and that whatever goes at home, goes at your house too.

[daycare]

No, you are doing right thing. I have a 2 year old dcg that will not sit still on the table and I put her in the highchair which she don't like it. She have to learn to sit still until she eats all or most. I am not allowed dck walk around with foods.

To me, I don't believe his father that he don't do that at home. Yeah, right!

yeah i am on the same page as you..... Yeah right this kid wont sit down for more than 30 seconds.... I guess what happens at my house only happens at my house.....NEVER at home...yeah uh huh sure

[Blackcat31]

I have a rule in my house that all children must stay seated druing meal times until finished. I think this is quite normal. This means no walking around with the food, up and down out of seat and so on

I have a DCB that just turned 2 and has been able to sit a the big kid table for the last month. Does pretty good, but the last few days, he is flipping over his chiar, standing up, walking around with food and the list goes on

I told both parents that this has been an issue and that DCB will need to sit back in the highchair.

So this morning at drop as dcd and dcb are walking in the door i pull out the highchair. its a really nice chair and is not a typical baby seat. Infact my 3.5 year old still likes to sit in it from time to time..

DCD walks right by me and put DCB at the table with the rest of the kids. I tell DCD not sure if you remember, but he needs to be in the highchair until he can get used to staying seated again.

DCD says No way, thats not going to happen. He is not a baby and we don't have him in a Highchair at home..So I go on to tell DCD " I cant have him walking around with food, it's not allowed here"

Of course dcd says well he doesnt do that at home.... Ok well he does it here, along with other things and i am not ok with it. He needs to sit in the highchair.

Dcd says your treating him like a baby and i don't approve of it...hands me dck and leaves pissed off..

As soon as dad leaves I put the DCB in the highchair. DCB could not care less about where he sits.

am I wrong for having dcb sit in the high chair? Am I making it seem like he is a baby?

Did i go about this the wrong way?

Then feed him at home.

It really doesn't matter what he does or doesn't do at home....ONLY what he does at your house and since he does not stay seated at your house...he is NOT ready to sit at the big kid table.

You do what works for you and they can do what works for them. None of my parents know where anyone sits, sleeps, plays or stays while their kid is here unless I tell them and I generally don't because it doesn't matter. It has no effect on what happens at home....and visa versa.

[Meyou]

I cannot believe how RUDE that man was to you!?!?!?!?! "It's not going to happen???" I'm fuming and it wasn't even me!!

You are totally right and it's none of his beeswax where his ds sits for meals. Your daycare works on your schedule and with your rules. Period. Why is he allowed to walk in and put him at the table?

[morgan24]

I don't think it really matters if it was wrong or right. It's your house, so you are right. He sits to eat. That dcd would get his walking papers at pick up. They have every right to disagree with me, but the minute it's rude or disrespectful bye bye.

[daycare]

I cannot believe how RUDE that man was to you!?!?!?!?! "It's not going to happen???" I'm fuming and it wasn't even me!!

You are totally right and it's none of his beeswax where his ds sits for meals. Your daycare works on your schedule and with your rules. Period. Why is he allowed to walk in and put him at the table?

ohhhhh man this DCD is a doozey... he takes longer than anyone under the sun to drop off even though I have tried to shoo him out the door many times.
He has to wash hands make him sit at the table, get up from the table, walk him to the door, give hugs say good bye, then more hugs more kisses, then a talk, then then then OMG get out already............

This dcd is so pushy that I gave up on this dcd sometime ago. we don't get along at all. So I just try not to cause drama... If it were not for the wife who is a sweetheart I would have kicked them out years ago,

[grandmom]

When a child moves to the table here, even at 2, if they get down, their plate disappears. It only happens a couple times before they figure out they need to stay seated. "Oh, so sorry, you got down, I thought you were finished. It will be snack time soon."

Granted, with the very young, I'll scoot them back to the table a couple times initially, but then nope, not again. Plate gone.

[Lucy]

Not wrong at all. However, in my opinion it really doesn't concern the parents. I wouldn't even have told them. No, it's not keeping secrets from them, but I feel like WHERE you sit the kids to eat really has nothing to do with the parents. It's great that you tried him in a regular chair, but he obviously wasn't ready for it, so he goes back in a high chair for another month or so till you can try again. I see the dilemma with the dad placing him in a chair and all, but I would still not have said anything (just to avoid a possible "discussion") and would have moved him as soon as dad left.

ETA: Sorry, didn't read anything past your original posting. Now I see why you told dad. But I'm trying to picture myself in that situation, (asking about high chair at the PM snack) and I think I would have down-played it and just shrugged and said, "oh, he almost tipped the chair and fell, so I thought he'd be safer in the high chair today" and then just move the conversation elsewhere. Play it off like it isn't a big thing. I dunno... that's just me I guess. And yes, I STILL would have not said anything the next morning and just moved him after dad left. It would make dad feel like he "won", but whatever. *shrug*

[cheerfuldom]

well no reason to doubt what you are doing. obviously the DCD is just a big pain and most likely will get ticked off every couple of weeks just to have some sort of power trip. you're not doing anything wrong.

[Unregistered]

I would start a rule that all parents stay in the entry way until you take the child from them or give them their child. He never should have even walked over to the table.

Some parents just think they are entitled and you know what their kids grow up thinking that as well. Drives me nuts.

Ps I am registered but having problems signing in. (momatheart)