Training Tonight

[MG&Lsmom]

The topic is 'Emotions Coaching'.

From the brochure: "Emotions dominate the world of children. When they are "fluent in the language of emotions", children bounce back from adversities faster, make friends more easily and have an innate ability to enjoy life. Children who can regulate their emotions have a greater likelihood of regulating their behavior. Our responsibility, as caregivers, is to consciously nurture their emotional skills. This workshop will explore ways to do this so every child develops emotional fluency. This is a hands on, make and take workshop."

I'm kinda excited and hoping it's a good lesson. I know sometimes these things are duds.

I will surely share what I've learned.

[daycare]

thanks for posting sounds interesting!! and yes please update us on anything you wish to share.

[MG&Lsmom]

Ok, so the training was amazing! It was not really a make & take, but I did get a packet of information to read through. There is so much I want to share!

The presenter was a Certified Human Behavior Consultant named Jeanine Fitzgerald. She has a consulting company called the Better Behavior Bureau and she works and consults with at risk kids around the country. While I didn't completely agree with her on some things, most of what she said was great information.

She talked about the emotional competency and explained in detail about the emotional development of children from birth to preschool years.

1. We tend to focus on the social competency of school readiness, but that unless a child knows how to self-regulate their emotions they can't be successful socially. As a parent of 2 ASD kids this is exactly what I live every. single. day.

2. The foundation of emotional competency and regulation starts at birth with a secure attachment to a primary caregiver. To form the attachment one must be able to provide for the needs of a child in a timely and sensitive manner. These kids trust and expect to be treated well. Insecure attachments lead to being cautiously trustful and not knowing when one will be treated well or badly. Uncertainty = anxiety. Disordered is your classic attachment disorder of abused/neglected children.

3. Those with a secure attachment usually have a positive working models for emotional well being. Those insecure or varied attachment tend to have poor working models. Disordered = bad.

4. Forming positive working models is 2 part and for all ages. A) giving a child meaningful responsibility B) encouraging behavior rather than always praising - she threw out 4x as much encouragement than praise.

She then went on to talk about the regulation piece. We enter the world being co-regulated by our caregivers, move into self regulation during the first 3 decades of life, and normally end our life back in the co-regulated state.

Infancy (birth to 12months): we need help with regulating our crying, sleeping and eating. She is a firm believer that one can never spoil a baby, so hold and sooth a crying baby, allow for a baby to sleep as much as they need, and feed a hungry baby - even if it's not on our schedule. As an infant moves into toddler hood you ease into regulating these things.

Toddler: toileting and emotions. Emotions in this age groups deals with identification of the 4 basic emotions (mad, glad, sad, afraid). This is all they can handle. She calls this Name It.

Preschool: Emotions modulation becomes owning your emotions (Claim It) means using "I" statements. And not "I feel sad you won't pick up" but rather "I feel sad everyone left these toys for me to pick up". "I feel sad XYZ took my toy" "I feel sad the toy was taken from me". Then Taming It, or modeling safe ways to show your emotions. Punch a pillow not your classmate. Instead of feel -> act -> think it should be feel -> think -> act

Impulse control: engage children in problem solving planning, play start and stop games (simon says, red light green light), and allow for relaxation.

She also mentioned a program called How Does Your Engine Run speaks to regulation of activity level. Every activity has an Eeyore, Pooh & Tigger speed and modeling which is correct. Also Brain Gym which physically helps children connect their bodies to their minds so they can think before acting.

Finally she spoke about mood and that's the toughest. But the biggest thing I took from that was, if you wake up on the wrong side of the bed, go back to bed, get up again and smile. She literally talked about sending a child back out the door who came in in a bad mood and let them try coming back in. Now I've actually used this one when I taught middle school and it stuns them so much it actually works.

This presenter was great and if you ever have the chance to see her I would grab it. She also has a book which I plan to buy if I can't find it at the library.

[momofsix]

Sounds like a great training, thanks for sharing some of what you learned with us!