Terminated Family Last Night

[texascare]

I terminated a family last night that I have been struggling with. They told me a year ago they picked me over other providers in the area because of my experience. The mother(first time mom) and I have butted heads 4 times now. Over little things. --vacation days, size of diapers what to feed the baby and how many times a day to feed him, etc. She is very dominant and has come in and literally told me how to do things in my buisness....I don't want to go into much detail becasue it isn't worth it, but last night was just the last straw. I am tired of being put down and repremanded by a parent. It was just the attitude and tone she used with me. I was professional about the situation and let her have her say but after she left I sat down and started thinking about all she said and the madder I got. I calmed down and several hours later I called her and asked if we could discuss what had happened that afternoon. Her attitude changed and she got defensive right away. I told her I hoped that she trusted me with her child and that i would never do anything that would hurt or harm him, but if she couldn't trust me then she needed to find alternate care. She agreed and then started in on me. About 20 minuites ladter I finally just said, "look I am giving you your two weeks notice." She finally quit gripping and said "oh well I want that in writting".

Why is it that we as providers (well most that I know) sometimes feel bad after we terminate? I feel bad for the child, but it was time to part ways. I am dreading when she shows up today.....

[morgan24]

Sounds like this is a dcm who is never going to be happy no matter what or how you handle a situation. I think terminating her was in your best interest. When I get talked down or they try to bully me even once, I let them go. I operate on mutual respect and when it's not there I don't waste my time. good for you, hope today goes well for you.

[ninosqueridos]

sounds like it was for the best good luck these next 2 weeks.

[safechner]

Don't feel bad about it, you are doing right thing to do. I would do the same thing if parents don't trust me doing with her/his child/ren.

Sometimes, the providers feel bad but it will take off your shoulder in a few days. Trust me, you will feel better for doing right thing to do.

[E Daycare]

I just termed a family I've been having issues with too. I have a notebook full of issues and i still felt bad when handing the mom the term letter. My human nature is to please everyone and if that doesn't happen then I feel it was somehow my fault. The mom tried to work something out or sit down to talk about my issues but she signed the contract, I tried to give them the benefit of the doubt but in the end the parent wanted things her way.

I stood my ground, let them know what their ending balance would be and that they would have to pay it even if their kid didn't come. The face to face was awkward and I felt really bad (I don't do well with confrontation.) but I didn't back track. After they left and I went over the things that irked me and read through the notebook I stopped feeling bad. I feel a sense of relief. She's still coming this week and i guess next week but it makes for anawkward time let me tell you.

I think they are hoping that if they show me they can now follow some of the rules in my contract come next Thursday (dcg last day) I will forgive them and continue care. I'm not changing my mind though, it's been a long time coming
I already dropped a new paper ad, have a new cl ad, word of mouth interviews and am hoping I've learned from this.

No one likes to be fired and this is almost the same type of situation. I say break up and move on!

[cheerfuldom]

yeah it is kind of like a break up. No one is happy but parting ways is still hard. Sounds like you did the right thing. I know I hate when parents treat me like a teen babysitter.....hello? 30 year old mom of 3 here!

[texascare]

well they won't be returning! I just got the call. They will pick up his belongings this week and wants me to email her my 2 weeks termination paper. This way we will have no more buisness dealings.....

[Lucy]

But she'll pay you for the two weeks right?

[texascare]

yes! Sorry forgot to add that! She wants to know how much she owes so that they can pay it and "have no more buisness dealings w/me.".....I found a termination notice that I liked on a website for providers and filled it out accordingly and put in when the last date of care would be and exactl;y how much they owed and when they owed it. In 20 years I have only terminated twice....just felt a bit odd to do it. Glad I stood up for myself though!

[wdmmom]

That's the best "break up" that can happen. A family that will pay the notice and not come back! I bet you feel so exhilarating! That's the best feeling ever, if you ask me!

Gimme my money and have a nice day! LOL::::::

[Evansmom]

Can you post a link to the termination letter? I'd like to have that on hand for myself should I ever need it.

I just termed a family that had been with me for almost 3 years b/c they had promised from the beginning that the DCG would come full time and she never did. I worked with them a long time and ended up losing money so I had to let them go. The "break up" didn't go well. The DCM was my "friend" until I told her the truth about needing to get a full time tuition for that spot. Now she's dropping off and picking up but not talking to me. At least you skipped that part! ::

[E Daycare]

That's the best "break up" that can happen. A family that will pay the notice and not come back! I bet you feel so exhilarating! That's the best feeling ever, if you ask me!

Gimme my money and have a nice day! LOL::::::

Man I wish that wouldve happened to me! The family that I termed (the one with all the issues and dcp showing up at like 10am on a day when the kid isnt supposed to be here etc...), I gave 2 weeks notice to. Their last day is the 14th and they are still bringing her. I understand mom works a lot and well they need the care, hence the part of my contract giving 2 weeks notice, but it makes things very awkward.

I really think they are hoping I change my mind because now they have been dilagent with bringing dck the times they say they are and picking her up on time with no issues. NOW. After 6 months of crap they think my termination letter is just a "scare tactic" I think. Sorry, come next Thursday all her stuff will be packed and ready to go.

For now though it just makes things really weird. I knew they'd stay the two weeks though.