Letting Them Go...What to Say??

[My4SunshineGirlsNY]

Well I have had the last straw...I am letting this one family go...I have vented here about them before, the 12 year old girl has BiPolar and she has an 8 year old brother. They have had severe behavior issues here at my daycare over the summer.

My little 3 year old girl was so sick today with a fever, stiff neck, upset stomach, even medicine was not bringing her fever down...when they all got home from school I asked them all to be quiet so she could rest. It got a little loud so I reminded the kids OVER and OVER. The 12 year old girl got really loud with my own daughter so I yelled at them both to sit down...while I was putting my 3 year old in my room to rest away from the noise, I hear the 12 year old crying (and she does this frequently because of her BiPolar..she cries LOUD!)...I asked them to explain what happenend...her and her brother were messing around and she got hurt. I asked her if she was sitting and she said no. I told her to sit and she got up. (just a little history, this girl NEVER sits, she paces the house and is constantly following me or the other kids...it's very destracting). Her fault, she should have listened to me. So her and her brother were in a little squabble AGAIN despite me telling them to be quiet so my sick girl could rest.

I text the mom and asked her what time the kids would be picked up..she told me and asked why, is something wrong? So I told her how my little girl was very sick and her kids were not listening and starting an argument (which happened ALL the time over the summer)....and she said to me..."well that's daycare, you can't expect them to be good all the time, every day". OMG, I knew that was the end..my little girl is sick, I am a very polite patient person and have been through a TON of stress with her kids due to their behavior and she had NO consideration that my girl was sick and needed to rest. I am so done!!

So any advise on a professional way to word it that they need to find other daycare?

[Former Teacher]

I do feel your pain. There are many ways you can handle it though. You could say that the 12 year old is to old to be in dc and that the brother is to rough to be around the little ones.

However you handle it, just make sure your personal feelings don't get involved. As you can tell from the news, people are report happy nowadays. Make sure you do this professionally.

What I would also suggest is that you give her an advance notice such as a week. Tell her on Monday that Friday is their last day. That way, she can't say you are throwing them out in the cold.

Remember, you ARE doing the right thing!

Good Luck!

[tymaboy]

In my policy I have a list of reasons that I can terminate. 1 being behavorial problems but if you took the kids knowing about the bipolar then I would not use that as a reason. I also have my inability to meet the childs needs, I think that would be the one I would use in this case. That way it sounds like it is your fault not theirs & may make it easier on the parents. Then they will think that you are looking at what is best for their child.

[ecemom]

I guess my first thought was what were they doing there if you daughter is sick?

But to answer your question, I agree with the previous answers. Take the high road and just say you do not feel like you are able to meet the needs of the children. And if you can stand it, I might give them 2 weeks notice.

Good luck! I would also do this in writing and in person.

[My4SunshineGirlsNY]

Thank you ladies...my husband and I sat down last night and wrote a proffesional letter...I was thinking of all the things I would have liked to say, but we kept it professional and didn't put any emotion or specifics in there....we stated it was in our best interest they seek other daycare as previous issues that have been addressed have not been resolved....and also that things were a little more than I anticipated (since I took her in knowing of her BiPolar, I was not anticipating how difficult it really was).

I also gave them 2 weeks to give them time to find someone since I ask for 2 weeks notice if anyone leaves my daycare.

Thanks ladies, I appreciate all your feedback. It is very helpful to me.