Screaming

[grandmom]

Hi all,

Looking for advice. I have a one-year old, been here full time for 9 months. He just went to the 1-year checkup and got a clean bill of health. He's an ony child.

He screams. It's naptime right now, and after a 25 minute nap, he woke up screaming. He didn't wake up and fuss, a little, and work up to a scream. He simply screams. He will settle down for a minute or so, and then start up again. Sometimes he will go back to sleep, sometimes he will scream the rest of nap. He's in a play pen situated so that he can't see us because if he sees anyone, his tone gets very irritated.

At anytime throughout the day he will scream if we (one of the adults) walk past him but don't pick him up. Or if we are standing, he seems to quiet down if one of us sits on the floor so he can crawl to our lap. If we start to go outside, and he's not first in line, he screams. If he's next to us and one of us gets up to walk across the room or yard, he screams.

At the 5 mo state it was suggested that we hold him all the time for a month because perhaps he has a need not being met. We did that for 2 months. Nothing changed.

We have talked calmly to him, sat on the floor, tried to anticipate his needs so that he's never hungry, touch him as we walk by so he knows we've acknowledged him.

We have ignored him until he's done screaming. How long does this go on?

My co-worker and I are at a point of just not knowing what to do. Any suggestions?

Thanks.

[marniewon]

My only thought is that holding him constantly for 2 months probably did way more harm than good, in that he expects it now (kind of like when we get an infant in our care that is constantly held and doesn't learn to soothe/entertain themselves).

Other than the above opinion, I have no words of wisdom or even any clues to help you. I had one of those also. He wasn't a screamer at the first, but after a few months became one. He was still a screamer when he left at 14 months.

[Angelwings36]

I agree with the above poster...holding him for two months probably did more harm then good. More than likely and especially being that he is an only child he is held alot, played with alot and has all attention on him at home. I have dealt with children like this before and my advice to you would be to try to 'wait' it out. He needs to settle into your routines, your rules and the way he is suppose to behave in your daycare. The only way for him to learn these ways is for you to enforce them. It may be hard for the first little while listening to him scream every time he doesn't get his own way but after a while he will give up and just go along with things and before you know he could quite well end up being a joy to see everyday! PATIENCE...PATIENCE...PATIENCE....