How Much Do Your Own Kids Know About...

[QualiTcare]

let's say "the life cycle"..?? i was wondering after reading the thread about bathing together.

i've always answered my kid's questions and told them what they needed to know, but not more than they were satisfied with. for example, my kids knew that babies came from "down there" but apparently were confused about EXACTLY where they come from because a few days ago they were arguing about it when my daughter said, "mommy, tell him babies come from your butt!" ::

i told her where exactly they do come from and she seemed mortified. later that night she came into the living room and said, "are you SURE that's where babies come from?"

anyhow, people seem really uncomfortable to know that both of my kids (especially my son) know about menstruation - to a degree. i personally don't see how a child can live with a female and NOT figure it out - either by walking into the bathroom, having to go to the bathroom with you out in public, or seeing "evidence" of feminine products and asking questions. i've just told them that it's something "mommies do" and it helps them have babies. i don't see anything gross about it or think it's inappropriate for kids to know about since it's a natural part of life. i wouldn't hesitate to tell them the truth about that anymore than i would to tell them about breasts and breastmilk. what do you think?

[jessrlee]

My daughter is slightly older (10) so she has the basic groundwork. She is just hitting puberty so she knows all about her period, she knows about the products to help with it and where they are located. She also has an emergency supply in her purse. As for sex she doesn't have all of the deets but we are working up to a basic understanding of what sex is, why we should wait, open communication, and boys are ucky anyway! LOL! I'm not always sure how much info to give her but so far it has all been very factual and she has been really mature about it. (Thank GOD she doesn't do the "oh so and so is soooo cute!" thing yet!") If anyone else has/had a 10 year old girl I would love some tips. I don't want to go over the line but it seems like you have to! We have a 6th grader preggers in town!

[laundrymom]

I have 4. 19-9. So when the oldest was 5 the middle was born. I told him boys had two holes, one for pee one for poop Girls had an extra for babies. Through the years it cycled through my kids and by the time they were 3/4 they knew about them. I see no reason to give specifics until they ask. Each family is different and there is no one " right " way. I am completely open with my oldest 3. The 9 yr old has never asked how they get there so I've not told her but she knows all about periods, boy and girl diferences, correct terms, and general workings. But we still call them " girl parts" and " boy parts" to be considerate to the differing parenting styles of the kids here. She knows the correct terms but we use girl or boy parts. In daily conversation. Right or wrong it's our way.

[QualiTcare]

- mine haven't asked specifically how babies get there, but when finding out where they come from my daughter was saying, "i don't want to get pregnant! that will hurt!" etc. i told her she doesn't have to get pregnant if she doesn't want to, and the only way she would get pregnant is if she and her husband both decided they wanted to - which isn't a lie! then she started saying she's never getting married - she's going to have a bf for awhile and then say "see ya ****a!" and get another one and say "see ya ****a!"

i'm sure the next question after finding out babies don't come from your butt is HOW they get in your belly. i'm not looking forward to that one.

[Blackcat31]

My kids are pretty on top of what goes on in their personal area and others too....I should hope so since they are 22 and 19! :: LOL!!


On a serious note, though I was very open and honest with them about anything they asked. I tried not to tell them more than what they were ready to digest at the time and just made really sure that they were comfortable in asking me anything they wanted to know. I think for us that was the key; setting the comfort level so they knew they could ask anytime.

Myown mother gave me a book when I was 12 and said, "If you read this and have any questions, just ask." I remember thinking WTH? I already knew most of it from my friends but I thought she could have been a bit more open about it. I later learned that she was simply uncomfortable talking about it and that was how her mom handled it so thats how she did it too.....

I vowed to make sure I was closer to my own kids than that...and both are very comfortable asking. This came in handy when my dd wanted to have birth control when she 17. It helped that we were already comfortable taking about stuff in that topic.

[QualiTcare]

My kids are pretty on top of what goes on in their personal area and others too....I should hope so since they are 22 and 19! :: LOL!!


On a serious note, though I was very open and honest with them about anything they asked. I tried not to tell them more than what they were ready to digest at the time and just made really sure that they were comfortable in asking me anything they wanted to know. I think for us that was the key; setting the comfort level so they knew they could ask anytime.

Myown mother gave me a book when I was 12 and said, "If you read this and have any questions, just ask." I remember thinking WTH? I already knew most of it from my friends but I thought she could have been a bit more open about it. I later learned that she was simply uncomfortable talking about it and that was how her mom handled it so thats how she did it too.....

I vowed to make sure I was closer to my own kids than that...and both are very comfortable asking. This came in handy when my dd wanted to have birth control when she 17. It helped that we were already comfortable taking about stuff in that topic.

my mom never talked to me either about anything - ever. i did have older siblings who told me pretty much everything i needed to know and then made a few things up along the way - like when they told me you could get pregnant from using a tampon.

my daughter is 6 (almost 7) and my son is 4 (almost 5) but everything they know so far is because i've answered questions they've asked. i'm surprised that laundrymom says her 9 year old hasn't asked about the "how" of babies bc i can't imagine at this rate i'll ever make it that long. maybe it's because someone already told her?

[DBug]

My boys (8 & 10) know the real names for all of the parts (internal and external) and they know the mechanics of baby-making, but I haven't gotten into menstruation with them yet. I know I need to, because as an un-informed teenager, my own husband got caught with his foot in his mouth on several occasions ::. I'm just not sure when I'm going to tell them. We have a kids' bathroom and a master bathroom in our house, so it's not like they'll come across my supplies and ask out of curiosity.

It better be soon though, because it'll start happening to their female classmates soon!

My 3 yo DD knows the names for boy parts, but not girl parts yet . I guess words for boy parts come up a lot more often when you do 5 potty breaks a day with 4 or 5 toddlers!

[SandeeAR]

Since mine are 27 and 29 and the 29 yr old is trying to get pregnant, they better TOTALLY understand it!::

[Blackcat31]

A dcm brought me this book one day and I about choked as I read it!! It is hilarious, but very correct in how it explains the whole process. It uses cartoonish pictures and all but it shows pretty much everything and how it all works...if you have never seen it before, it is totally worth getting it from your library to look at.....probably one of the best informative and funny books on this topic out there....

http://search.barnesandnoble.com/Mommy-Laid-an-Egg/Babette-Cole/e/9780811803502

[cillybean83]

my oldest is 8...and it's pretty entertaining to hear what HE thinks about all this stuff.

He asked me what a tampon was, so I told him that mommies bodies like to stay ready just in case a baby wants to grow in their tummy, and if after a few weeks, if no baby grows, all the blood that was getting ready for the baby has to get cleaned out, and tampons catch the blood. He says "so it's like changing the sheets...except in your guts and stuff?" I was like well...kinda except not in the guts, in the womb. He says "where's my room (womb)?" I told him only girls have a womb, it's also called a uterus...so he was content with that info, then a few days later he out of no where, at the dinner table, turns to my hubby and says "ya know...mom has a ute-eh-bus...and i don't"

[jen]

my mom never talked to me either about anything - ever. i did have older siblings who told me pretty much everything i needed to know and then made a few things up along the way - like when they told me you could get pregnant from using a tampon.

my daughter is 6 (almost 7) and my son is 4 (almost 5) but everything they know so far is because i've answered questions they've asked. i'm surprised that laundrymom says her 9 year old hasn't asked about the "how" of babies bc i can't imagine at this rate i'll ever make it that long. maybe it's because someone already told her?

I have a 7 & 11 year old (16 too, but he obviously knows whats up) and they have never asked....

[ammama]

My DD7 has asked how babies get in there (i'm pregnant right now, so she is pretty curious), and I don't know what to say. I tried the basic "when a mommy and daddy decide to have a baby.." talk, but then she got a bit freaked out thinking she might get pregnant at any minute. My DH thinks we should tell her the basic mechanics, that boy and girl parts fit together to make a baby, but I don't want to put that picture in her mind. I just told her i'll tell her more when she's a bit older. Bad cop out, I know, but I didn't know what else to say.

[QualiTcare]

I have a 7 & 11 year old (16 too, but he obviously knows whats up) and they have never asked....

so do you think they've learned elsewhere, possibly from your 16 year old - or have you had any "sit down" type talks before?

i would say my daughter was 4/5 when she started asking questions about babies and my son was three when he sort of accidentally learned about menstruation and went to inform his sister who started asking a million questions.

[QualiTcare]

My DD7 has asked how babies get in there (i'm pregnant right now, so she is pretty curious), and I don't know what to say. I tried the basic "when a mommy and daddy decide to have a baby.." talk, but then she got a bit freaked out thinking she might get pregnant at any minute. My DH thinks we should tell her the basic mechanics, that boy and girl parts fit together to make a baby, but I don't want to put that picture in her mind. I just told her i'll tell her more when she's a bit older. Bad cop out, I know, but I didn't know what else to say.

that's exactly what mine did - freaked out acting like she could spontaneously get pregnant! that's when i told her it wasn't possible until she started her period and even then that she and her "husband" both had to DECIDE they wanted a baby. it's not lying - it's just giving enough info. to satisfy them until next time.

[jessrlee]

Just be careful not to make it a "big exciting secret". My mom told me at 12 that she would tell me about the birds and the bees when I got older. She never wanted to answer any questions or talk about it so later in life my boyfriend taught me all about the birds and the bees. I assure you, you don't want a 17 year old boy teaching your daughter ! I still don't know what my mom was thinking!