Should I Term

[gbcc]

I am very upset by this daycare mother and I am considering terming the family over this one incident.

So this 9 year old boy "lost" his PSP charger. Now my rule is, you bring it, you watch it. Not my responsibility. Anyways, he throws a fit saying someone stole it. So I was helping look for it in the playroom when I heard my son yelling and having his own fit.:confused:

Turns out DCM took it upon herself to search my sons room

I was so upset and just speachless. I couldn't say anything. Where would I begin. Who does she think she is??? First off this kid looses his games daily. My son finds them in the yard, down the couch wherever and always returns them to the kid. So if he is going to steal it would be a $50 game not a stupid charger to a game system he doesn't even have.

So duh she doesn't find it up there and they leave. Well she calls about 15 minutes later to let me know they found it. It was in the kids bag the whole time, he just didn't look. No appologies or anything. She just wanted to let me know. UGHHHHH.

Now I don't mind a parent seeing the conditions of my home where the child is ALLOWED to be. My bathroom, kitchen whatever. If you have questions by all means come see. But no one has a right to walk up my stairs and invade my families private rooms. This happened Friday and I am still just fuming about it 4 days later.

[jen]

I am very upset by this daycare mother and I am considering terming the family over this one incident.

So this 9 year old boy "lost" his PSP charger. Now my rule is, you bring it, you watch it. Not my responsibility. Anyways, he throws a fit saying someone stole it. So I was helping look for it in the playroom when I heard my son yelling and having his own fit.:confused:

Turns out DCM took it upon herself to search my sons room

I was so upset and just speachless. I couldn't say anything. Where would I begin. Who does she think she is??? First off this kid looses his games daily. My son finds them in the yard, down the couch wherever and always returns them to the kid. So if he is going to steal it would be a $50 game not a stupid charger to a game system he doesn't even have.

So duh she doesn't find it up there and they leave. Well she calls about 15 minutes later to let me know they found it. It was in the kids bag the whole time, he just didn't look. No appologies or anything. She just wanted to let me know. UGHHHHH.

Now I don't mind a parent seeing the conditions of my home where the child is ALLOWED to be. My bathroom, kitchen whatever. If you have questions by all means come see. But no one has a right to walk up my stairs and invade my families private rooms. This happened Friday and I am still just fuming about it 4 days later.

I would absolutely terminate! No question.

[SilverSabre25]

I think I would absolutely term. That was a total invasion of privacy--yours AND your son's! That dcm had NO RIGHT to search your son's room...that's as good as accusing him of theft! That she would do that makes me wonder what tales her son tells her that made her "suspect" your son that way.

Totally, absolutely, over the top inappropriate.

[Cat Herder]

Buh-Bye PITA mom.....


BUT......why do you let them bring toys from home???


Just thought of this... Is her son allowed to play in your son's room at all?

[Blackcat31]

I would term IMMEDIATELY! Total disreguard for boundaries! I would be livid at the implied accusation!

Your situation is EXACTLY why I do NOT allow toys from home. I do not want the responsibility or the hassle.

[SandeeAR]

I would have THROWN them out right then!!!!!! She would never set foot in my home again and neither would the child. I don't care if I did need the money!

I agree, why allow toys from home? And how did she get past you and into your sons room anyway?

[gbcc]

Buh-Bye PITA mom.....


BUT......why do you let them bring toys from home???


Just thought of this... Is her son allowed to play in your son's room at all?

No he is not allowed in my sons room. If my son would like to share something he can bring it down but it's his problem if it breaks.

I allow toys from home but I make it very clear that it is each child's responsibility. If the toy is lost or broken it's not my responsibility. I tell parents I need more money to babysit toys.

Is it too late to term seeing as this happened 4 days ago? I just couldn't address it because I was really mad and I didn't want to be unprofessional. How do I bring it up?

[My4SunshineGirlsNY]

The audacity of her! Wow, seriously, I would NEVER think of doing such a thing.

Does she disrespect on other things as well? If she made me feel uncomfortable I would consider it...I seem to be a ****er and hold on to families that really should have been gone long ago, but I'm working on my backbone.

[MommyMuffin]

That would upset me. That is why I do not take school age or toys from home. When they come with toys they get taken away and given back to parent at pick up time.

[Blackcat31]

No he is not allowed in my sons room. If my son would like to share something he can bring it down but it's his problem if it breaks.

I allow toys from home but I make it very clear that it is each child's responsibility. If the toy is lost or broken it's not my responsibility. I tell parents I need more money to babysit toys.

Is it too late to term seeing as this happened 4 days ago? I just couldn't address it because I was really mad and I didn't want to be unprofessional. How do I bring it up?

I would term and just tell mom you waited because you were so angry you did not want to do anything out of anger but after calming down and rationally thinking over the situation, you are still mad and you just cannot continue providing care to someone who has no respect for you or your (and families) privacy. IT IS NOT TOO LATE.

[gbcc]

And how did she get past you and into your sons room anyway?

I was in the playroom so I didn't see her walk by me to the stairs. I have a gate up so I knew no children could get by so I wasn't really paying attention to the doorway. I thought she was just waiting for me in the coat room. My living room is off my coat room and then the playroom is off to the side of the living room and coat room. So usually parents just wait in the coat room or come to the gate to get the children.

[Cat Herder]

It is never too late.

Especially if she knew those bedrooms were off limits.

IMHO, it was an accusation, an intrusion, blatant disrespect and you have every right to kick her to the curb.

I bet she never considered how scary that was for your son...

I can't imagine how that felt as a child having his "safety area" violated with a physical intrusion AND accusation by an adult acquaintance like that.

I'd have my own Mom by the throat for that one...YKWIM? (and before any of you read too far into that, she raised me that way Team Mama Bear!!)

OMG...I just saw she stepped over a gate to do it.... I would have lost it.

What would she have done if you allowed your husband to corner her son alone in a room???

[JenNJ]

Wow - just wow. I would have a letter at pickup today. Its never too late. She implicated your son was a thief and disregarded your family's privacy
I would not want her in my home again.

[gbcc]

Does she disrespect on other things as well?

She has never disrespected me ever. That is what is so surprising. She always pays and is polite. This was like a different person.

[cillybean83]

next time she comes, tell her to go back home with her kid, she's no longer welcome...and if she doesn't like it. TOUGH