Such a Fool Duped By DC Parents :( Need Advice Please!

[QualiTcare]

What schools around you have school for over 7 1/2 hours a day? Every school in my area is 6 - 6 .5 hrs! Unless you are talking about a center or after-school care.

schools here typically start at 8am and let out at 3pm so that's 7 hours - but teachers have to be there before the kids arrive obviously which was 7:30 when i worked so if a teacher had to be at school by 7:30 they would obviously have to drop their own child(ren) at daycare by 7 or 7:15 at the latest.

then school dismisses at 3, but the kids have to wait for the carpool line and/or the bus - so teachers rarely leave before 3:30 at the earliest and stay later than that typically, especially when there are meetings.

so even if a teacher had to work from 7:30 - 3:30, their own children would still be in care for 9 hours counting commute time.

[3kidzmama]

I currently teach public school. I am required to be there at 7:15 am and cannot leave until 3:45 pm, and that is only if every student has been picked up or has left on the bus. We also have weekly meetings every Monday from 4-5 pm. These are required.

[momofboys]

schools here typically start at 8am and let out at 3pm so that's 7 hours - but teachers have to be there before the kids arrive obviously which was 7:30 when i worked so if a teacher had to be at school by 7:30 they would obviously have to drop their own child(ren) at daycare by 7 or 7:15 at the latest.

then school dismisses at 3, but the kids have to wait for the carpool line and/or the bus - so teachers rarely leave before 3:30 at the earliest and stay later than that typically, especially when there are meetings.

so even if a teacher had to work from 7:30 - 3:30, their own children would still be in care for 9 hours counting commute time.

I'm surprised they are in for 7 hrs. . . our kids' school is 9-3:10 (early elementary). I misunderstood you. . . I realize teachers stay later & come early. I thought you meant the kids were physically there for 8 hrs :-)

[cillybean83]

personally, I would keep this parent for as long as they would stay. This is a business, and you are getting a lot of perks from this business deal with the birthday gifts and toys and whatever else...plus now they will be paying you for the extra time so it isn't like you've extended your hours for free. There are a lot of parents who would want to leave their kids in daycare for 12 hours a day, for a lot less.

Does it **** getting up at 6, definately...but is it worth the extra income for your family? Thats what it would boil down to for me, not some moral objection to the amout if time mom and dad were spending with dcb, just because a child is physically with a parent doesn't mean the parent is engaging with the kid...your kid who stays in daycare for 12 hours could potentially be getting 100% more quality time with mom and dad than a kid who spends 7 hours...we don't know what goes on at THEIR house, and it isn't our business, our business is what goes on in OUR homes...and if you love dcb, and he is happy there, and you can handle the extra hours, and you need the extra money...i don't get what the problem is...minus an issue with the kid being away from mom and dad for so long

[Zoe]

OP, I understand how hard this must be for you. I can tell you care a great deal about this child. I'd have a difficult time terming as well, knowing that the kid could potentially be going to a not-so-great center. I'm going through something similar right now with a school-ager. But I won't get into it.

Are there any other in-home providers that you know and trust who would be more okay with the scenario that you could refer this family to? That way you KNOW that this child will be well taken care of and on top of that, you are less stressed and can be the great childcare provider that it sounds like you really are. This is really a moral issue and if it's something you can't get past (I'd have a hard time with it too), then it will start to show and the parents will probably pick up on this and leave on their own.

Something to think about!

[missnikki]

So they are on to me. Just got an email from DC Dad. It basically Thanks me again for the new schedule and then says that since March 1st is coming, he needs to know what the new weekly fee will be. He also adds that he will of course, add in the difference between the new and old fee for the last three weeks on to March's check. He also tells me again how wonderful I am that I did not even mention this to them when I honored their request for the new schedule. He also says that I do not need to hesitate when naming that price as they expect to pay at least what a center would charge, since "in his opinion" my daycare is "superior" to any center out there. So there you have it folks - either thursday's revelation with my learning the truth regarding his wife's work schedule prompted this or they have been reading this thread ( ! Highly, highly unlikely)

Well, it seems to me that they would have egg on their face to put the kid in a center after that. Tell them your concerns, and be upfront and honest. Let them know that raising a child while having decompression time is not a catch 22 that you throw money at. It won't end well. Tell them you have a couple of suggestions that will benefit the child, and may require sacrifice other than financial on their part. That may get through to them.

[Unregistered]

This breaks my heart . . .

I'm so sorry that this family is doing this to you. I know so many parents that do this to their provider or center, it blows my mind. I would give anything to be able to afford to be a stay at home mom or just to have more time. I've rearranged my personal chore schedule (laundry, grocery shopping, cleaning) to best accomodate spending more the most time with my child. Your story breaks my heart. As a customer, I drop my kid at the latest time and get him at the earliest I can - I never keep him at daycare when I'm home. Every day I have off work or get off early, I have him. I really think there should be more of a nation wide effort to educating parents about the importance of spending more time with their kids. Sorry, but most young kids aren't up as late as parents are. I have plenty of me time after my kid goes to sleep at night. I actually plan regular special events all the time for us as a family and events just for him and his dad, etc. I hate hearing about parents that don't want to spend time with their kids.

[squareone]

So they are on to me. Just got an email from DC Dad. It basically Thanks me again for the new schedule and then says that since March 1st is coming, he needs to know what the new weekly fee will be. He also adds that he will of course, add in the difference between the new and old fee for the last three weeks on to March's check. He also tells me again how wonderful I am that I did not even mention this to them when I honored their request for the new schedule. He also says that I do not need to hesitate when naming that price as they expect to pay at least what a center would charge, since "in his opinion" my daycare is "superior" to any center out there. So there you have it folks - either thursday's revelation with my learning the truth regarding his wife's work schedule prompted this or they have been reading this thread ( ! Highly, highly unlikely)
.

I would put it past them that they have gotten wind of this thread. How else would his email respond to your EXACT concerns regarding the financial part of this?

Just let them know that you appreciate the offer but you don't want more pay - you want dcb picked up by X time. Period. I agree with pp that the new pickup time should be the same time that the last other daycare kid is picked up.

[Debbie]

My mouth dropped when the mom said those where her new hours. Charge them for the extra time. That is a long day. Write up a letter and present it to them. Thats just not right. If she was paying you for that time, that would be one thing but you got dooped! Let us know what happens!

Debbie

[Michael]

Debbie,

You should register. That way you can post freely without having to be moderated.

https://www.daycare.com/forum/register.php

[momma2girls]

My maximum time is 9 hrs. a day- this is 45 hrs. a week. I used to do 11 1/2 hrs. a day- UGHH!!!

[busymomof2]

I am not trying to be harsh here, but I don't see the problem. You have 2 choices. Continue working way before your opening time and until 6 pm (or later), for a family that doesn't need the care OR tell them you won't do it anymore.

Personally, I think you need to look at what makes YOU happy. Does it make you happy to be getting up early when they don't need care? Does it make you happy to know the mom is 'decompressing' while you get to spend time with her child? If the answer is no, you need to tell them 9 hour days only.

If you can live with the fact you are working 3 hours every day for free don't say anything. If you are happy with this situation don't rock the boat.

If it were me, I would not be happy about the situation and I would be okay losing them as clients. As another poster posted they don't respect you. I don't work with people who don't respect me, because it makes ME unhappy.

As much as parents say that it is important to have 'happy mommies' I say it is important to have 'happy daycare providers', if I am not happy, this doesn't work for ANYBODY.

I agree 100%. This past week I was Very sick and closed one day and opened the rest of the week even through I was still very sick. All my kids and dc kids were sick too and sill attending. One day the DCM drops off sick child to me in her pjs and says she is taking the next couple of days off because she is sick. Hello I am sick too, my kids are sick and so is YOUR child. I was too sick to confront her but pissed that she kept him here for the 10 hours while SHE rested. Like I don't rest...or him.

[QualiTcare]

I agree 100%. This past week I was Very sick and closed one day and opened the rest of the week even through I was still very sick. All my kids and dc kids were sick too and sill attending. One day the DCM drops off sick child to me in her pjs and says she is taking the next couple of days off because she is sick. Hello I am sick too, my kids are sick and so is YOUR child. I was too sick to confront her but pissed that she kept him here for the 10 hours while SHE rested. Like I don't rest...or him.

she was sick enough to call off of work. maybe she figured if you were too sick to work, you wouldn't be working either. sorry, but if you were so sick and all the kids were sick as well - it's on you for staying open.

[jen]

she was sick enough to call off of work. maybe she figured if you were too sick to work, you wouldn't be working either. sorry, but if you were so sick and all the kids were sick as well - it's on you for staying open.

She didn't just drop off her kid, she dropped off her SICK kid.

I will agree with you on this...there are people aren't going to do the "right" thing by their provider or by their children unless they are FORCED to. If the kid was sick, send them packing. No doubt, you'll end up losing the client, but those are the clients its OK to lose.

Its just freakin' sad and depressing how many parents care primarily for themselves at the expense of everyone else, including their kids. In order to be OK with daycare we need to resolve ourselves to that fact and decide in advance what we can and cannot deal with, and then stick to it.

[QualiTcare]

She didn't just drop off her kid, she dropped off her SICK kid.

I will agree with you on this...there are people aren't going to do the "right" thing by their provider or by their children unless they are FORCED to. If the kid was sick, send them packing. No doubt, you'll end up losing the client, but those are the clients its OK to lose.

Its just freakin' sad and depressing how many parents care primarily for themselves at the expense of everyone else, including their kids. In order to be OK with daycare we need to resolve ourselves to that fact and decide in advance what we can and cannot deal with, and then stick to it.

right, her sick kid - but not too sick for daycare apparently even by the provider's standards. from the sound of it, she was sick and allowed a house full of sick children. it's true - parents will do what they can get away with - at the same time, "sick" can mean a runny nose and a cough whereas the parent may have been vomiting and/or unable to function - so of course she'd use daycare if it's ALLOWED.