Help Please!!

[daycare]

Try adding this to your PHB

Napping Policy:

Crucial physical and mental development occurs in early childhood, and naps provide much-needed downtime for growth and rejuvenation. Naps also help keep kids from becoming overtired, which not only takes a toll on their moods but may also make it harder for them to fall asleep at night. Not to mention that it is a major requirement for good health.


From 1-3:30 all children will be required to set up a mat and rest in the resting area to allow for those children who need sleep time to do so. Unfortunately, our program does not offer services to children who do not nap.

At 3:30 all lights will be turned on in the napping area and all curtains will be opened. A wake up announcement will be made; no child will be forced to wake up and will have the option to wake up by themselves. Due to our scheduled afternoon snack time and curriculum schedule, no child will be allowed to sleep past 4:00 PM regardless of what time they fell asleep.

[nannyde]

Yes, since I've had him he had been sleeping with mom and dad in there room since they don't have enough bedroom. The 2 older kids each have there own and he sleeps w/mom and dad. But recently they have placed him with his older sister. So I am sure with the recent changes that is part of the problem they have. But even before that they would mention him getting up at night and not wanting to play or so over tired he just cry and cry. He's pretty much driving them nutz and with the lack of rest the parents are just not happy. I want to help but I am not sure that even a 2 hr nap here will make much diff. I don't quite know what time they put him to bed at night although I think I really need to have a sit down talk with them. Prob. mostly with the father. In person. It would be so easy just to call mom and tell her that the 10 to noon is a no go and also that dad will need to stop lingering here bc little guy just wants to go or he gets confused and wants me. It a problem all around.

I wouldn't discuss one second worth of what he does at home and what they do with him. It doesn't have ANYTHING to do with your business.

It doesn't matter if their new nap plan would work for him or them. That doesn't have anything to do with your business.

If you get into discussions like that then you are allowing them to make their parenting woes HAVE something to do with your business.

I would not have a meeting with them. I would just tell them what I have said or simply tell them that it won't work for you. PERIOD. I would also tell them that you don't allow parents to stay during pick up. He needs to pick up and scoot out the door. You don't allow parents to provide care for their children under your roof.

If they REALLY want to solve it they can pick him up at 11:30 and keep him up. You can nap him from ten to 11:30 every day and then they can pick up and keep up for the rest of the day. They are MAKING this about you and it isn't.

I think you are being VERY bullied by these guys and only YOU can get it to stop. They need to BEHAVE if they are going to have a slot in your day care. Nap with the other kids and do a quick arrival and departure every day. NO negotiations.

[daycare]

I wouldn't discuss one second worth of what he does at home and what they do with him. It doesn't have ANYTHING to do with your business.

It doesn't matter if their new nap plan would work for him or them. That doesn't have anything to do with your business.

If you get into discussions like that then you are allowing them to make their parenting woes HAVE something to do with your business.

I would not have a meeting with them. I would just tell them what I have said or simply tell them that it won't work for you. PERIOD. I would also tell them that you don't allow parents to stay during pick up. He needs to pick up and scoot out the door. You don't allow parents to provide care for their children under your roof.

If they REALLY want to solve it they can pick him up at 11:30 and keep him up. You can nap him from ten to 11:30 every day and then they can pick up and keep up for the rest of the day. They are MAKING this about you and it isn't.

I think you are being VERY bullied by these guys and only YOU can get it to stop. They need to BEHAVE if they are going to have a slot in your day care. Nap with the other kids and do a quick arrival and departure every day. NO negotiations.

funny how parents are just like their children... always trying to negotiate the rules....
grow up and follow the rules or find another daycare.....

Ok I would never say that, but really they are acting like children who think they can try to push the boundaries....

[broncomom1973]

Maybe I missed this somewhere cause I just skimmed over the responses, but are you on the food program? I imagine it's the same everywhere, but if we get "caught" feeding a child during a time that we have not listed as a meal time, then we do not get reimbursed. It has to be during the times that have been submitted by the provider as breakfast, lunch and snack time. Is this not the way it is everywhere? If it is, just tell the parents you have to serve lunch between such and such time or lose your reimbursement.

[nikia]

So dad gets off at 11:30 but leaves in care until 4 or so correct? Then that makes this pretty simple I think. Tell them you tried it out it isnt working for the group either he naps with everyone or they are changed to contracted hours and anything over 11:30 is $1 per minute.

As Nannyde said you have to be firm about napping policy right from the beginning, its the one thing I have a backbone for :: the kids know the rules and the schedule and it makes things run smoothly with everyone on the same schedule. It drives me bonkers with late drop offs because it just throws everyone off, I cant imagine if one child saw another child able to stay awake when they had to lay down.

[snbauser]

I agree with the others. I give parents a copy of my schedule during our interview. I am the only one (well and maybe my teachers ) who changes the schedule and it is not at the request of a parent. There is no way I am going to try and keep one child quiet and occupied while the others are trying to sleep. I have children here 10 1/2 hrs/day. Their rest time is my rest time.

[Blackcat31]

I am currently doing a book report for my Challenging Behavior class and the book I was assigned is called Sleepless in America: Is Your Child Misbehaving or Missing Sleep? by Mary Sheedy Kurcinka. All I have to say is WOW!!! I had no idea...it is well worth the read!!!

[Live and Learn]

I agree!!

Every child naps here from 1-3. Unless the parents want to pay a maid to come and do all of the things I really need to do while they sleep there are not going to be any exceptions!

Parents really have no idea what a long day this is for us! I would like to see them work through their lunch and coffee breaks EVERYDAY like we all do!

I decide nap time in my house.::

[Christian Mother]

No, I am not founded with the state or on the food program. Bc my parents claim me I do right off quite a bit and that also being meals. I have a part time parent that brings there child late and then picks up early bc she doesn't want him napping so today I decided to test out everyone's advise. What I did was just plainly tell her that per her contract we agreed on M-T-TH but since she is allowing her son to tell her when he would like to come he is coming on W and F. I know, what am I doing..?!! But, I had a back bone today and told that nap time is important to everyone on so many levels and although I understand she doesn't want her child to nap I would prefer that she pick him up at 12 noon as I put mine down. Before she would come around 1pm sometimes 2pm. I didn't even mention extra money as she didn't argue or defend her self. I just explained that I have another family wanting there child's nap time changed and if I bend the roles for her then I should do the same for them. I just didn't give her an option. This gave me a way to be able to work up to talking to the other parents bc your right they have bullied me and although I love there child I am not loving the stress there parents are giving me. The book "Is Your Child Misbehavior or Missing Sleep". I need to ck that book out!! You guys have been great w/all your inform. thank you really!! I appreciate all the feedback. The reason I haven't really said anything about charging $10 for every hr is basically...If they want to find a diff. childcare that will offer that type of nap time they are more then untitled...I have had to deal w/quite a bit with this family so I am just plain tired. So if they don't like that I have tried what they wanted and it didn't work out then I guess they'll have to find other arrangements. I feel bad for the little guy as they did daycare for quiet a while and she was forced to go back to work bc all of her childrens parents losses there jobs. She did a lot of part time care so she had about 10 kids all together but 3 each day. And the thought hasn't crossed my mind that it strange they all gave notice and said the same thing. hmmm...But this little guy has never been into daycare and it took the normal 2 wk adjustment time to get him comfortable with me. Now, he is attached to me and he is such a diff. child since before summer time. I would hate to see him go bc we've bonded so well but man..his parents are a nightmare!

[Sunny Day]

Sorry, but you're a daycare--not a catering service. I would never agree to that. I make the schedule for my daycare, not the parents. I'm willing to work with parents within reason, but them expecting you to go ALL day without a break, just so they can put their kid to bed at 7:30 is a joke. Plus the whole food thing. omg.

[Christian Mother]

I know!! What baffles me the most is that these parents were in the same biz before using me them selves and I have to just ask them if they would allow there child's parents to dictate when they should have naps. I think that they would have to say no,..so why should I?!! I can't wait for Mond. bc, I will be talking to mom who drops of her son...she is easier going and not as demanding. When I tell her that I have tried to work with them on that nap schedule and it just hasn't worked out for anyone that I need to put him down with everyone else as it really isn't fair to the other parents nor to me. She will have to understand that I should have a little time to my shelf. I will not even give them a option to pay me $10 for the time he is up bc by giving them an option..that wld mean I would be bending my rules and then I can see them trying to bend somewhere else in the future. If I won't allow other parents child here during nap time bc they don't want them napping then why shld they think I would do that for them? I'll have to see how she takes that bc she really wont have any other choice. But for the most part she normally doesn't get crazy...although I can see her w/ all smiles telling me no problem what ever makes things easier and then straight on the phone with her husband to complain which wld then mean I would be getting a call from him or him coming early to pick his son up. I just hope it is around 3pm when my husband comes home as I don't want to be around a cranky parent bc he didn't get his way.

[TSDaycare]

I have 3 almost 2 yr olds, they all sleep at least 2 1/2 if not 3 hrs at naptime. Thay are all up at 530 and at my house by 630 daily, and they usually go down for a nap 1215 1230ish. This seems okay for all of them, by lunch time they are dead tired so they sleep very, very well most days!

[Christian Mother]

All mine are new 2 yr olds as of this past Dec. and then I have a 1 1/2 and another who turns to next month. All the 2 sleep for 2 hrs. except for one which mom picks up at nap time as he is a part timer and here just a couple of hrs. she wanted to leave him through nap time and I said I am sorry but I just can't do that for her as I am about to have the same discussion with another parent. There is one little boy who naps for 2 hrs but man...by 5pm he's sooo tired...he needs a 3 hr nap. But he is also a very big boy and needs a lot of stimuli. Bc I have all boys..they pretty much wear each other out but there are those days its to cold to go out side and we're in AZ...I know...its not snowing but for us we arn't used to 50 degree weather..!! I have never had any problem with my children napping. They don't even cry going to bed. They all go into seperate rooms and lay down. The windows are darked out so it's dark and I play Christian music for back ground noise. I have a wonderful group of kids ...I am just struggling with this particular parent.

[Christian Mother]

Update!!

I lost quite a bit of sleep over this over the last couple of days...prayed a great deal and then today...was numb...!!

I just came out and told DM that I am having quite a bit of problems with putting down DB at 10am. I explained that there is so much noise at 10am and i couldn't possibly ask these children to be quiet as DB is sleeping at 2 yrs old...they don't understand that. She explained that DB that with me putting him down at 10am its helped them as he isn't waking up until 4am now. I said that he isn't getting a full nap in as he can't sleep while the children are playing..it's just to load and then he wants to sleep into 1pm as he missed that first hr trying to rest. Not to mention that I use those 2 hrs to decompress...Cleaning w/listening to soft music helps me get a clear mind...eating my lunch..reading. Those are for me hrs. I said I shouldn't have to work through my lunch. We should all be able to have those 2 hrs for our selves. She was not happy at all. But, at least I said what I wanted to...nervous...but I didn't hold back and I was honest with her about how I felt.

You know, I wonder with both DM and DD bc DD said he isn't sleeping at all for them at night and can't be put back to bed once he's up. I asked what time he goes down for bed and she said between 7:30pm-8pm. So by the time he goes home which can be anywhere between 4-4:30pm he really is only getting 3 hrs of time with his parents. I agree with Nannyde that a child should always have 5 hrs of time with there parents that way they are good an ready for bed. I didn't get a chance to say that though bc she rushed me off and said she will speak to DD about this. I smiled and said no worries. So, either 1 of two things happens. DD comes early lingers and down loads on me about why I can't work on this with them...or he comes at his time of pick up 4:30pm and doesn't say anything but picks up his child and leaves. Now, all I need to do is discuss with DD about him lingering at DC. That I leave for Tues. as my husband will be home and gives me that added security to talk to DD.

[Unregistered]

I agree with what everyone else is saying. It sounds like mom and dad are having sleep through the night issues and forcing that onto you.

I had one mom who told me her 2 yr old could only sleep 30 min (actually only be on her mat 30 min-regarless of if she fell asleep or not in that time I was to remove her from her mat and play/stimulate her from 12:30-4 when her mom came to pick her up.) This kid was dead tired all the time. Mom kept her up until 11 at night just so she wouldnt get up before 5 am everyday. What a joke. Often times, I let her sleep until 3 like everyone else and what do you know those were the nights she was the best behaved and slept normally.

Don't let this family run your daycare. If it doesn't fit for them then they will have to move on to somewhere else.