DCD-"I Had to Bribe Son to Get Him to Want to Come Here"

[Core12]

Last night at pickup, 2 yr old didn’t want to leave, hung onto my leg and dcm had to pull him away from me
This am, dcd says, “I had to bribe him by letting him wear his Mickey Mouse shirt in order to make him want to come over here.”
Why, what the hell?

[Pestle]

Transitions, man.

[Cat Herder]

"I know it's tough sometimes, kids really want to spend time with their parents."

[trytobearunner34]

My 2 cents

It could have been a defensive reaction to feeling badly that her son didn’t want to leave and come home with her.

[e.j.]

I agree that transitions can be tough for kids. What was dcb doing before he had to leave home? Was he woken up before he was ready to wake naturally, was he rushed through breakfast and getting dressed? Was he pulled away from playing with his toys or watching Daniel Tiger? Was he enjoying his time with Dad? Two year olds don't understand a parent's need to get to work on time. I think dcd's need to bribe his kid had more to do with what was going on at home vs. how the dcb feels about going to your day care.

Parents (people in general, really) can be thoughtless when they speak. Dcd probably didn't think about what it was he was saying and how it might make you feel.

[Cat Herder]

Parents (people in general, really) can be thoughtless when they speak.

Re-reading what I typed (with a 6 week old in my arms) I don't think my point was made as well as I hoped.

It sounds like an accusation to me, now. My intended message was that the kid loves being with dad and wants to spend the day with him, not me. Kid loves dad. Period. Dot. :: I eat breakfast with the daycare kids, after arrival, so early mornings are not my shining hours. I'm a bit hangry. ::

I struggled with dropping my kids off with family to work my part-time (out of the house) job. They wanted to be with me. I felt guilty. TBT, I probably spend more on guilt gifts and outings than I earned per shift back in the pre-school days. ::::

[Ariana]

I always say “ah poor guy/girl they love their mommas/poppas as it should be....hopefully we can try to be more fun that momma/poppa today!!!” I say it in a joking empathetic way because kids really should want to be with their parents. I have a 17 month old who does not care when her mom picks her up but gives my DH a hug when he gets home from work. Mom drops off in the morning and kid doesn’t even bat an eyelash just runs in.

[Blackcat31]

Transitions, man.

They don't want to leave, they don't want to come, they don't want to nap, they don't want to get up, they don't want to eat, they won't stop eating......

2 yr olds are tough and they rarely, if ever want to do what you (the adult in charge) want them to do.

[Snowmom]

If I knew throwing a tantrum could work for me...

I could stay in my own bed, play with my own toys and not have to share everything around me, I would stay home (alone) too.

[knoxmomof2]

"Yeah, 2 year olds are unpredictable. Last night at pickup, he didn't want to leave. Hey buddy, nice shirt!" 😁

[e.j.]

Re-reading what I typed (with a 6 week old in my arms) I don't think my point was made as well as I hoped.

It sounds like an accusation to me, now. My intended message was that the kid loves being with dad and wants to spend the day with him, not me. Kid loves dad. Period. Dot. :: I eat breakfast with the daycare kids, after arrival, so early mornings are not my shining hours. I'm a bit hangry. ::

I struggled with dropping my kids off with family to work my part-time (out of the house) job. They wanted to be with me. I felt guilty. TBT, I probably spend more on guilt gifts and outings than I earned per shift back in the pre-school days. ::::

Ooh! I hope you didn't think I was commenting on your reply. I thought you made a very good point: If given the choice, most kids would choose to spend the day with their mom or dad over their day care provider. That's really as it should be.

[Cat Herder]

Ooh! I hope you didn't think I was commenting on your reply. I thought you made a very good point: If given the choice, most kids would choose to spend the day with their mom or dad over their day care provider. That's really as it should be.

I didn't. It just applied.

[lovemykidstoo]

I have a dcm that says that all the time. Last time I got irritated and said thanks alot. Makes me feel good. She's like Oh I'm sorry I didnt' mean it that way. I mean think before you speak. This is a mom though that I swear she builds him up to anxiety when dropping off because he's 4 1/2 and she admits to doing things and letting him do things because she's "not ready for him to get bigger". ugh. She treats him like he's a year old. He still has a pacifier at home and in the car for goodness sakes. He comes in, lifts his feet up 1 at a time and she takes his shoes off. I roll my eyes and say he can do that himself you know.

[nannyde]

I have a dcm that says that all the time. Last time I got irritated and said thanks alot. Makes me feel good. She's like Oh I'm sorry I didnt' mean it that way. I mean think before you speak. This is a mom though that I swear she builds him up to anxiety when dropping off because he's 4 1/2 and she admits to doing things and letting him do things because she's "not ready for him to get bigger". ugh. She treats him like he's a year old. He still has a pacifier at home and in the car for goodness sakes. He comes in, lifts his feet up 1 at a time and she takes his shoes off. I roll my eyes and say he can do that himself you know.

I would tell her that I charge more per day for children that don't want to be here so it's probably best not to relay that information or her rate will have to go up.

[LostMyMarbles]

Last night at pickup, 2 yr old didn’t want to leave, hung onto my leg and dcm had to pull him away from me
This am, dcd says, “I had to bribe him by letting him wear his Mickey Mouse shirt in order to make him want to come over here.”
Why, what the hell?

And I would have responded with oh, yeah I don't like getting up at 6 either.