Touching All the Things And All The People, All The Time

[Hunni Bee]

I have a 4.5 year old. He has ADHD. He's very sweet and he tries his best. But he has to touch everything and everybody constantly. If he's talking to you, he's touching you. If you don't stop him, he'll be on top of you in a few minutes. He squeezes, grabs and rubs parts of my body that I'd rather he not His friends are getting weary too.

I always explain that he's not entitled to someone's personal space, and we practice asking before we touch, talking without touching the person, etc. I try to fulfill some of his needs for touch with frequent hugs, hand holding, hands on the shoulder etc. Also I try to make sure he gets as much physical activity as I can.

I don't know what else to do. He walked his fingers up my dress yesterday - totally absentmindedly, but I could have screamed. Help?

[hwichlaz]

I have a 4.5 year old. He has ADHD. He's very sweet and he tries his best. But he has to touch everything and everybody constantly. If he's talking to you, he's touching you. If you don't stop him, he'll be on top of you in a few minutes. He squeezes, grabs and rubs parts of my body that I'd rather he not His friends are getting weary too.

I always explain that he's not entitled to someone's personal space, and we practice asking before we touch, talking without touching the person, etc. I try to fulfill some of his needs for touch with frequent hugs, hand holding, hands on the shoulder etc. Also I try to make sure he gets as much physical activity as I can.

I don't know what else to do. He walked his fingers up my dress yesterday - totally absentmindedly, but I could have screamed. Help?

He knows that isn't appropriate. He's not doing it on purpose, but he does know. It's okay to have a big reaction when someone's hand goes up your dress. I bet a big reaction might help him remember to stop.

[Ariana]

I had the same kid last year, undiagnosed ADHD but SLP hinted at it and dad has it. Anyway what worked for me was pictures and social stories. I found the pictures and social story online and read the social story a few times at circle and he stopped for the most part. Not enirely but 90% better!

[knoxmomof2]

I don't have much information for you on how to teach him not to do those things, but I use "no thank you" and "I need some space" around here to stop unwanted behavior in the moment. Both for me and for the kids, so the finger walking would have gotten a "no thank you" and me taking a step back, then just continue what I was doing before. Not listening would have resulted in a time out. He may not have done it on purpose, but I put up a boundary and he needs to stop at that point. If any of my kids use "no thank you", that means someone is taking their toy, hurting them, etc... and I intervene in order to prevent someone getting hurt. If they say "I need some space", it means just that - back up and quit following me! Lol....

[kendallina]

My 9 year old daughter is like this. We suspect ADHD but she also has definite sensory issues. She's like this even at 9 years old.

We've tried all kinds of 'discipline'. It's very difficult for her to help herself.

We find that lots of sensory activities helps. Slime, sensory table with rice, etc, and squishies-great, non messy sensory are our friends. She also loves spinning! She has a desk chair in her bedroom that spins and before she goes to sleep she lays on her belly and spins for for-ev-er!

Some kids like this do better with a weighted blanket. My daughter didn't like it and they're expensive, so you probably don't want to invest in one.

[LK5kids]

I was going to suggest tactile items like squishes too. Target has lots on an end isle by the toys.

Also play doh, sensory bottles, water beads, etc.

[BumbleBee]

I have 3 like this . dcb6 Adhd (by far the worst when it comes to this), dcb4 Add, Dcb5 asd/add. I have no advice that actually works but here's some things we do to try and curb it.

No thank you
Asking before touching
Giving their hands something to do
Separating them and giving them something to keep their hands busy when it was escalating.

What worked the 'best' was when dcb6 and Dcb5 got into it because while they both like to touch without permission, they don't like to BE touched without permission . We used it as a teaching moment, over and over.

[flying_babyb]

we had kid like this. You know those bracelet rattles for babies? we bought one and wrapped it with differnt textures. it had a rabbit in the center. We would have the child put it on and that was his "touch" toy. He could touch whenever he wanted. When he would get touchy with his friends, we would make him hold it in his hands. Busy hands, less touching others