Will I Be Successful...

[tenderhearts]

if I try to potty train a child and the mom isn't working on it? Here's the situation, I just started a boy who will be 4 in a few days, he is NOT potty trained. I knew this upon him entering care but I really want to work with him. He's a very big boy and not necessarily overweight he's very tall too, so it feels like I'm changing a 7 or 8 yr old Do you think I'll be successful if I work here on my own? He is full time, here's my thought that I would just make it a normal days routine that we use the bathroom in hopes he'll adjust to that and learn that's what we do and it will click and he'll be potty trained in no time? Think it will work or am I wasting my time? The other problem is the diapers are really too small for him and I think he's at the largest size. If he has a blow out I'm in trouble.

[SilverSabre25]

I don't know if you'll be successful, but holy sheep I don't think you have any choice but to try!

Have you talked to mom about potty-training, found out why he isn't yet, anything like that?

[DCMomOf3]

I have a friend who PTs regardless of if the parents are doing it at home. It ends up being that they are trained at her house and not with mom/dad. I would go ahead and tell the parents you will be expecting him to start using the potty at daycare and it would be very beneficial to her son that she work on it at home too. Just be aware the parents may not want to train too, or not support you in your efforts.

I prefer the parents to do it first, but at 4, there is really not much time to wait since he will be in school in the not-too distant future.

[DBug]

I would totally go ahead and train him. Make a bathroom schedule and stick to, do rewards or a sticker chart -- the whole nine yards. Hopefully he'll jump on the bandwagon and at the very least, he'll be trained at your place even if he's not at home. If you have another child (a toddler, perhaps?) that can be doing the same schedule with him, it may help to add some positive peer pressure.

Good luck and bless you for taking him on! I know I wouldn't want to, but it sounds like he could really benefit from your help!

[tenderhearts]

Thanks, we did discuss it in the interview and he's the youngest child of 5 and the others are quit a bit older, she said they have tried but he just doesn't seem interested at home, so she is hoping he'll be like the last child and just all of a sudden one day it will click. I mentioned at pick up that he used the potty all day and we're working on it and she said oh that's great we'll try to and we have but we have had no success with him. So I'm hoping it will work.

[jen]

I potty trained a little one recently whose parents were not onboard. Every morning I'd bring her to the bathroom, toss the diaper, tell her that we were going to use the potty at Jen's house.

At first, her parents took her home in big-girl pants, but before long they were asking I stick her back in diapers, which I did. That lasted a couple of weeks and then she started to use the bathroom at home as well.

[melskids]

i handle potty training alot differently then most providers. i dont wait until mom and dad do it at home. i figure, they are with me 45-50 hours a week, way more than their parents, so i always start here. i can't tell you how many children i have cared for that are FULLY potty trained here, and not at home. its so funny how that works, how kids know the difference, but humans are creatures of habit, i suppose.

i have an almost 3 year old who i feel is ready, but mom insists he wont go anywhere near the potty at home. he is coming back full time next week (mom has been laid of ~ would have been the perfect time for her to do it, right) so we will start once he gets back in to the routine of things.

[Lilbutterflie]

I think that if you are willing to put in the effort, you could definitely be successful!! Like a PP said, when he walks in the door, take him to the bathroom, take his diaper off, put underwear on, & tell him he will use the potty at your house. No more diapers. Get him excited about this new big boy step!

Good luck! Keep us posted!

[Blackcat31]

I have a friend who PTs regardless of if the parents are doing it at home. It ends up being that they are trained at her house and not with mom/dad. I would go ahead and tell the parents you will be expecting him to start using the potty at daycare and it would be very beneficial to her son that she work on it at home too. Just be aware the parents may not want to train too, or not support you in your efforts.

I prefer the parents to do it first, but at 4, there is really not much time to wait since he will be in school in the not-too distant future.

I agree...I have had several dck's be trained here and not at home. I gave up because without parental support, children seem to revert to whatever is easiest so for me it was like shoveling when it is still snowing out...kwim? Plus, whenever, I took more than a day off it seemed as though I had to start everything all over again when I came back....hubby said I should never have allowed the child to go home! LOL!!

[tenderhearts]

I had him go in there about every 45 min, he seemed fine with it and was successful mostly the later part of the day. It would still bother me but I think it bothers me more because he's just a big kid and his diaper doesn't even go fully around his waist, it barely touches and I'm pretty sure it's the largest size you can get. Wish me luck...Hopefully since I mentioned it they'll work at it more too...

[cillybean83]

Honestly, a 4 year old is old enough and smart enough to understand to use the toilet without a lot of training, he'll probably pick up on it with you just talking to him and saying "ok bobby, it's time to use the bathroom, lets go try and pee in the potty!" or something... IMO...his parents are lazy, there is no excuse for a 4 year old who has no developmental delays to not be potty trained

[tenderhearts]

That's what I'm hoping, I did tell her I was having him use the potty and she did supply pullups today in his bag, that made me happy AND they fit so I'm hoping she's on board too and this will be quick and painless...

[tenderhearts]

Well so far so good, he's stayed dry ALL day, yeah, except he pooped in his pull up, so does anyone have any ways they teach and help the pooping process too? I hope he starts telling me he has to go in the next couple of weeks, maybe I'm expecting too much, we'll see....

[momatheart]

write down the times he poops and put him on the toilet around or close to that time and one of these times you will have success!

[Abigail]

I agree with MomatHeart,
Keep track of when he goes #1 and #2 daily and after a week or two you'll notice it's a routine. Maybe not time wise, but before/after certain activities even. Then you'll be prepared. Have you been reading any "I can Potty" books? I would pull out the sticker rewards for #2 in the potty if he already uses it for #1.