Those Who Have Been Doing Home Daycare For 10+ Years

[JenNJ]

What do you know now that wish you knew the first few years?

[kathiemarie]

If I want people to respect what I do then I have to respect what I do. To stand my ground with my rules and not to be friends with clients, friendly yes but not friends.

[AnythingsPossible]

I will be at 9 years this summer, so not quite 10, but enough to know I would have changed a few things.
~no amount of money is worth it for a child who causes you stress and problems throughout the day. I have had numerous children like this, and I have always tried to "tough it out" and always ended up terming after being miserable for years.
~stick to your policies and don't feel guilty about it. I still don't do this, but i think it is because I didn't from the beginning.
~don't become to friendly with the people you provide services for. in my situation it has made sticking to my policies even harder.
~don't put daycare before your family. i started doing daycare so i could be here for my kids. while I am home for them, I have missed out on so much at their schools because i have never been in a position where i could take kids with me. i don't have a lunch hour i can take to run up to the school to see their play or to have to lunch with them. i have missed a lot.
~stick to your comfort zone, again, I don't do this. i am constantly taking on more kids then i truly feel comfortable with, mainly because it is a lot of part time people and they beg me to take their kids.

Everyone will have different ideas and I'm sure that there are people out there who don't have issues with the things that I do, but these are the things I would have done differently.

~also, have an exit plan. if you know you don't want to do this forever, put money away so that when that day comes, you have the capability of closing and moving on to the next chapter of your life.

[Blackcat31]

whew..where to start...

I wish I had known:

*to never put my "friend" relationship with parents ahead of my business relationship with them.

*to always enforce my policies. Once you give in, there will always be an area for negotiation.

*to NEVER do business with friends or family (no matter how well the intention, IF it doesn't work out, you have tarnished that relationship forever)

*to not think I can save every child who comes my way. It isn't my job or my responsibility.

*to never allow clients make me feel bad for their financial situations. I have obligations too and I do not vent to them about my fiancial woes.

* to remember that I may be the only constant in some kids' lives and it is an important job...even if others don't see it that way.

* to be open minded enough to learn something new every day. I am continually surprised by some of the things I learn even after 16 years.

* to network....providers in your area should never be viewed as competition but as co-workers.

*to never take someone leaving personal. It may feel personal and they may even have left due to my actions, but if I always act in what I believe is in the child's best interest at the time, I can feel good about the outcome.

* to NEVER be afraid to term a child/family who is not fitting in. We are all different and it is okay to admit that someone is just not a good match. Doesn't make them better or worse than us...just not the right fit.

*to ALWAYS take the high road and NEVER get ****ed in to arguments and high school like behaviors.

*to never gossip about anyone in my childcare. Professionalism at all times is how you build a good reputation.

* to remember that candid and frank conversation is all part of the job and it is sometimes necessary to have an uncomfortable conversation with a family. Just keep it factual and professional. Sending mixed signals will get you mixed reactions. Be open and honest...even when it is an uncomfortable subject. (READ: develop a backbone early on and practice using it)

* to not always give so many details and explanations. Sometimes I see threads on here where letters or conversations contain so many extra or unnecessary details it makes my head spin. It is okay to make decisions that are in your best interest and let parents know, but you don't always have to go into in-depth explanations.....

* to take time for yourself and never let a parent make you feel guilty for closing.

* to remember why I started in this profession in the first place. Do what is right for you and your family and NEVER feel guilty for that. EVER.



Those are the things that come to mind when I think of giving advice to newbies....I am sure I could write a book....oh, sorry looks like I did! LOL!

[daycare]

whew..where to start...

I wish I had known:

*to never put my "friend" relationship with parents ahead of my business relationship with them.

*to always enforce my policies. Once you give in, there will always be an area for negotiation.

*to NEVER do business with friends or family (no matter how well the intention, IF it doesn't work out, you have tarnished that relationship forever)

*to not think I can save every child who comes my way. It isn't my job or my responsibility.

*to never allow clients make me feel bad for their financial situations. I have obligations too and I do not vent to them about my fiancial woes.

* to remember that I may be the only constant in some kids' lives and it is an important job...even if others don't see it that way.

* to be open minded enough to learn something new every day. I am continually surprised by some of the things I learn even after 16 years.

* to network....providers in your area should never be viewed as competition but as co-workers.

*to never take someone leaving personal. It may feel personal and they may even have left due to my actions, but if I always act in what I believe is in the child's best interest at the time, I can feel good about the outcome.

* to NEVER be afraid to term a child/family who is not fitting in. We are all different and it is okay to admit that someone is just not a good match. Doesn't make them better or worse than us...just not the right fit.

*to ALWAYS take the high road and NEVER get ****ed in to arguments and high school like behaviors.

*to never gossip about anyone in my childcare. Professionalism at all times is how you build a good reputation.

* to remember that candid and frank conversation is all part of the job and it is sometimes necessary to have an uncomfortable conversation with a family. Just keep it factual and professional. Sending mixed signals will get you mixed reactions. Be open and honest...even when it is an uncomfortable subject. (i.e develop a backbone early on and practice using it)

* to not always give so many details and explanations. Sometimes I see threads on here where letters or conversations contain so many extra or unnecessary details it makes my head spin. It is okay to make decisions that ar ein your best interest and let parents know, but you don't always have to go into in-depth explanations.....

* to take time for yourself and never let a parent make you feel guilty for closing.

* to remember why I started in this profession in the first place. Do what is right for you and your family and NEVER feel guilty for that. EVER.



Those are the things that come to mind when I think of giving advice to newbies....I am sure I could write a book....oh, sorry looks like I did! LOL!

wow thanks so much for sharing...what great advice...

even be a newbie, just being on this site I have learned a few things...One in mind that I have learned here in "dont just fill a spot for the sake of needing to fill it"

meaning, make sure that "who" you are choosing is right for you and your program. I have learned that all realtionships start on a foundation no matter what type of realtionship it is. Being that ours is business, when you see red flags from families, don't settle. No relationship will be good if it starts out with red flags and doubts.


I hope that I am making some sense here, but this is what I have learned from this site through many of your vets.....thank you!!

[ninosqueridos]

In less than two years, I have learned about half of BLACKCAT's advice the hard way. Thank you blackcat for posting for all the newbies like me!

[Blackcat31]

In less than two years, I have learned about half of BLACKCAT's advice the hard way. Thank you blackcat for posting for all the newbies like me!

Thanks! That is funny because I do know that stuff because I learned it the hard way too.....but I do have to say I think the hardest lessons learned are the most remembered also. And besides the negative stuff I have learned alot of positve stuff that I wish I had known when I started such as;

*you will grow to love some of your dck's children as deeply as if they were your own.

*families/parents who truly appreciate you are worth their weight in gold!

*smiles and hugs from a child are unconditional and have no underlying motives.

* Every time I think I have seen and heard it all, I find out I am wrong!

* The fluids that come out of kids aren't the worst part of the job!

* I actually do have control over the things I am willing and un-willing to put up with.

* I have made enough good/happy memories with kids and families that I have cared for over the years to last me a lifetime. They will far outweigh the bad things every time.

* I have, do, and will continue making a difference in every child's life that comes into my home.

*For all the late fees and missed payments I have lost out on over the years, I have earned twice as many hugs, kisses and thank you's to make up for it.

I think the biggest think I have learned through the years though is that:
life is only 10% what happens to us and 90% how we react to it!

[Angelwings36]

For Mom's That Started Their Daycare To Be Home For Their Own Children...

Sorry posted in wrong place and not sure how to delete.