Parents...Long Vent

[Jo123ABC]

A good rule of thumb, at least for me is honesty.
I wouldn't ever lie or pretend I have to be somewhere at pick up just so a parent doesn't linger. You'll end up having to perform the same act every day from now on...

Instead I choose to be open and honest and simply tell a parent, "I understand wanting to chit chat at the end of the day but the nature of my job does not allow me regular breaks during the day so at the end of the day, I want to be done. period. If you would like to chit chat, you are welcome to come a couple minutes earlier in the morning and chat before going to work."

9 out of 10 parents wouldn't dream of wasting THEIR time like that so they don't come early to chat.... they are wasting YOUR time at the end of the day and getting YOU to continue providing care/entertainment for their child for FREE....

Put a stop to it and simply tell them they need to get their child ready and go...don't stop to chat, smell the daisies or anything else, just get your kid and go home.

Everything that needs to be said should be said with a smile and if a parent doesn't understand and respect what you say they are showing you they do not value you or your time in the same manner they value theirs. Do you really want clients like that?

Like I said, I prefer honesty with a smile verses passive aggressive attempts to get selfish parents to see my perspective.


As for the parent with the milk issues.... provide her with a copy of the meal requirements from the food program. Tell her you are required to follow those requirements and if she wants something done differently she needs to have her child's physician fill out a special diet statement outlining feeding requirements.

Uff, I need to work on being more direct... Another thing I've been wondering about but can't seem to find any info on is: who is responsible for the child when the parent is present in my home? The lingering parent once sat on the bottom of my staircase while we were playing downstairs and let her 16 month old go all the way up by himself! my heart was in my throat watching him... he is not stable enough to go up stairs without someone behind him in case he falls. So who's liable for that accident if it happens!?

[Blackcat31]

Uff, I need to work on being more direct... Another thing I've been wondering about but can't seem to find any info on is: who is responsible for the child when the parent is present in my home? The lingering parent once sat on the bottom of my staircase while we were playing downstairs and let her 16 month old go all the way up by himself! my heart was in my throat watching him... he is not stable enough to go up stairs without someone behind him in case he falls. So who's liable for that accident if it happens!?

You. ANYTHING that happens on your property is YOUR responsibility.
Even if the parent signed the child out and left the building but stays to let their child play in your yard.

I have a very strict policy about this. I can message you what it says in my handbook about it if you would like.
Just let me know!

[lovemykidstoo]

A good rule of thumb, at least for me is honesty.
I wouldn't ever lie or pretend I have to be somewhere at pick up just so a parent doesn't linger. You'll end up having to perform the same act every day from now on...

Instead I choose to be open and honest and simply tell a parent, "I understand wanting to chit chat at the end of the day but the nature of my job does not allow me regular breaks during the day so at the end of the day, I want to be done. period. If you would like to chit chat, you are welcome to come a couple minutes earlier in the morning and chat before going to work."

9 out of 10 parents wouldn't dream of wasting THEIR time like that so they don't come early to chat.... they are wasting YOUR time at the end of the day and getting YOU to continue providing care/entertainment for their child for FREE....

Put a stop to it and simply tell them they need to get their child ready and go...don't stop to chat, smell the daisies or anything else, just get your kid and go home.

Everything that needs to be said should be said with a smile and if a parent doesn't understand and respect what you say they are showing you they do not value you or your time in the same manner they value theirs. Do you really want clients like that?

Like I said, I prefer honesty with a smile verses passive aggressive attempts to get selfish parents to see my perspective.


As for the parent with the milk issues.... provide her with a copy of the meal requirements from the food program. Tell her you are required to follow those requirements and if she wants something done differently she needs to have her child's physician fill out a special diet statement outlining feeding requirements.

For the record, my post did not intent to come off as lieing to the parent about running errands. I have to say that it is rare that I'm not running out the door as soon as the last child is picked up. Sometimes I will put fresh makeup on or go to the bathroom first, but when I have a talker, I make sure i'm ready to run out the door and most times I"m getting into my car before they are I would not lie and just drive around the block versus being directly honest with her if I didn't have somewhere honestly to go.

The last part about the milk bingo! I would do the same on that. We have to follow the food program guidelines or have a dr's note.

[Blackcat31]

For the record, my post did not intent to come off as lieing to the parent about running errands. I have to say that it is rare that I'm not running out the door as soon as the last child is picked up. Sometimes I will put fresh makeup on or go to the bathroom first, but when I have a talker, I make sure i'm ready to run out the door and most times I"m getting into my car before they are I would not lie and just drive around the block versus being directly honest with her if I didn't have somewhere honestly to go.

The last part about the milk bingo! I would do the same on that. We have to follow the food program guidelines or have a dr's note.

I wouldn't have thought you would lie personally anyways... we've both been around here long enough to know each other fairly well. lovethis

I was kind of just commenting on it in a general way because I know a lot of newer providers will take the easier ways out of things verses just doing the hard work of telling it like it is.

[Ariana]

A good thing to do if you can’t be direct is to simply nod and smile. DO NOT ENGAGE in any conversations, ask questions nothing. Let every topic drop. They will get the hint and you aren’t being rude in any way.

[lovemykidstoo]

I wouldn't have thought you would lie personally anyways... we've both been around here long enough to know each other fairly well. lovethis

I was kind of just commenting on it in a general way because I know a lot of newer providers will take the easier ways out of things verses just doing the hard work of telling it like it is.

Same here but for others here that dont' know me as well.

[Jo123ABC]

You. ANYTHING that happens on your property is YOUR responsibility.
Even if the parent signed the child out and left the building but stays to let their child play in your yard.

I have a very strict policy about this. I can message you what it says in my handbook about it if you would like.
Just let me know!

I'd be happy to see your policy on this!

[Blackcat31]

I'd be happy to see your policy on this!

I PMed you!

[WBee]

I was in your same situation a couple of years ago. I updated all my policies I included late fees and I actually had a parent leave due to me finally charging a late fee after her sixth late pickup and two verbal notices stating I would be charging a late fee the next time. They will walk all over you if you let them and you will continue to hate your job if you don't put your foot down. I also had a parent who had three other children not in my care and they would literally run around my house at pickup time for 20 minutes. One even sat on my dining room table every afternoon for a 2 weeks and the mom said nothing. I sent a notice home stating that siblings needed to stand near the doorway and notified all parents that I would be closing my business 10 minutes earlier every day in order to do cleanup. That same parent read the notice and came in asking if any policies had changed. My response to her was "you did read the notice right?" She left a couple of months later. I've found my backbone and enjoy the job much more now. I had a family interview a couple of weeks ago and they asked how much late fees were. I knew at that point I did not want them here so I told them one dollar per minute. They never called back. Put the issues back on them not yourself. Good luck! 😊

[amberrose3dg]

I was in your same situation a couple of years ago. I updated all my policies I included late fees and I actually had a parent leave due to me finally charging a late fee after her sixth late pickup and two verbal notices stating I would be charging a late fee the next time. They will walk all over you if you let them and you will continue to hate your job if you don't put your foot down. I also had a parent who had three other children not in my care and they would literally run around my house at pickup time for 20 minutes. One even sat on my dining room table every afternoon for a 2 weeks and the mom said nothing. I sent a notice home stating that siblings needed to stand near the doorway and notified all parents that I would be closing my business 10 minutes earlier every day in order to do cleanup. That same parent read the notice and came in asking if any policies had changed. My response to her was "you did read the notice right?" She left a couple of months later. I've found my backbone and enjoy the job much more now. I had a family interview a couple of weeks ago and they asked how much late fees were. I knew at that point I did not want them here so I told them one dollar per minute. They never called back. Put the issues back on them not yourself. Good luck! 😊

All of this. I had the same thing. A dcm paid me late for months when I warned her so many times. I finally gave her a big fat late fee and she left. I will not let anyone walk on me. They either respect me and my rules or leave.