Parent Observation

[Baby Beluga]

I know there have been threads like this before, but my search terms are not working.

I have a potential parent who has not yet had an interview but has asked about an observation where they can "stop by for a bit in the morning."

Mom is coming from a center. She was the director their for a number of years and has since changed careers.

I am on the fence.

On one hand I get her wanting to see how her child interacts with the group, etc. On the other hand, what is the point? The kids NEVER act normal when a stranger is present. Plus, I can't entertain a parent and give attention to my children at the same time.

Do you allow visits? If so, why/why not?

[Blackcat31]

I do not allow....

My quote below is from another thread

https://www.daycare.com/forum/tags.php?tag=parent+obervation

https://www.daycare.com/forum/tags.php?tag=parent+observation

My reply is usually:

"While I understand that you would want to "see me in action" before leaving your child for the first time, I cannot allow it for several reasons.

First is the privacy of the other children and their family's. I do diaper changes, deal with medical issues/conditions, and discuss their home life with them on a daily basis. I have a strict privacy policy and having another adult around violates the trust between my clients and myself.

Second, you are a stranger to the children and their parents. Please consider how you would feel if your child were in care and I allowed a strange adult to the daycare to observe your child.

Third, I consider the trust my clients place in me the cornerstone of our relationship. In a childcare relationship I am asking that a client trust me completely with their child. I ask for honesty and open communication. Asking me to prove myself above and beyond my criminal background check, photo identification, insurance information, and references is not something I am willing to do.

I do understand if you need to find other arrangements. Just know that I value the children's safety and security above all else and allowing adults in to observe them is not part of the safe and secure environment I promise them each and every day."

[Mom2Two]

I do not allow....

My quote below is from another thread

https://www.daycare.com/forum/tags.php?tag=parent+obervation

https://www.daycare.com/forum/tags.p...nt+observation

I love this and may use it someday.

I wonder what this mom/former director is looking for, specifically.

I don't think I've ever been asked to have a parent sit in here. But to me, they get to see the environment during interview, and I do ask them to bring their child for the interview. If a child gets along well with other children, that is gravy. If they're wondering if there are any awful behavior problems, they can just ask. I talk about the other children (ages, genders) during interview. I put a lot of effort into teaching children to treat each other appropriately (if old enough) or managing the environment (if younger).

I recently had an interview for a (very) part time child where the mom wanted references. I gave her one to call and shared some other public info about another family. Then she wanted the phone number of that second family. I just ignored that request, because it felt so super-controlling. She says she wants the spot anyway. It was just weird, because she knows that three of my families have been with me for 2.5-3.5 years, and she knows the professions of those families. What better reference is there than that?

[HappyEverAfter]

I had someone ask to do that once and I don't allow it. My reasoning is simple. The guest/observer is essentially a stranger to myself and the children that I care for. For their safety, which will always be my highest priority, I do not allow observation. I do allow tours of my home during non daycare hours, references of past and current parents whose children I've watched, and a sit down in depth covering of my policy handbook.

[Meeko]

I don't allow it. I cannot give the children my full attention (which I am being paid for) if I am also monitoring a visiting parent. Current clients are not paying for me to play hostess and allow strangers around their children.

NEVER do children behave normally around strangers and any provider is going to act like Mary Poppins when being watched, so it doesn't ever give a parent a true look into what a day at the daycare is truly like.

I get goofy with my kids and will not ever do that being watched by an adult I do not know!!!

I tell parents to check out my references (I include both past and present clients) and to check my licensing record. Other than that, I expect them to trust me or look elsewhere for care.

[Josiegirl]

I have in the past but the replies have brought up some great points! I, unfortunately, can see both sides. It takes time to trust a provider and if a parent knows little to nothing about them, I can see how leaving their child(especially an infant ) with someone they don't know would be so hard. One of my newest dcfs got my name from a co-worker and I came highly recommended by her boss too. But even with all that, her baby is the most precious being to her and she did want to get to know me better, as HER provider to HER child. She came and read to our group towards the end of the summer, which I thought was a cool idea. But I remember, many years ago, 1 dcm who wanted to come and observe; she ended up staying and playing with us outside. While I understand the reasoning, it makes for a difficult change in routine, to say the least.
I think I'm copying some of BC's wording on this topic and adding to my handbook to prevent future situations and requests from popping up.

[Sweet pea]

And you can nearly always guarantee most will outstay their welcome too, which makes things very uncomfortable fir the whole group

[Baby Beluga]

As always BC has the words to professionally and politely articulate something. I wish I had that talent ::

BC, I tweaked your wording a bit and used it. Thank you!

[Michael]

I know there have been threads like this before, but my search terms are not working.

Here is another thread: https://www.daycare.com/forum/showthread.php?t=38525

[jenboo]

I do tours during daycare hours. That's the parents chance to see how things go.

[LysesKids]

I do not allow....

My quote below is from another thread

https://www.daycare.com/forum/tags.php?tag=parent+obervation

https://www.daycare.com/forum/tags.p...nt+observation

THIS... I actually have a similar policy, for same reasons