Help Me Word This

[amberrose3dg]

I have a daycare grandma that I need help writing a policy for. Her daughter is in jail and she has custody of her granddaughter. The state is paying her daycare. They raised her copay and cut her time back to 6 hours a day. She is constantly late and shows up an hour or two passed the 6 hours. The state told me to get her to sign something stating shes gotta pay x amount of dollars per hour that she is late or terminate her. I know that is the only way I can get her to pick up on time is to hit her wallet so to speak.She already complains about the few dollars a day she has to pay. I have tried to get her to pick up on time as I do not want her money. She is working yada yada and i'm tired of the arguments. I would term but her grand daughter would be really upset and I feel like this is the only thing stable in her life. (both parents in jail, mom got out only to go back on child endangerment charges against her) I have late fees in my contract already but i need something that after 6 hours the state is no longer covering and you are now responsible. I just can't think how to write it up.
Help

[Rockgirl]

Can you make a copy of what the state sent you and show it to her?

[Pestle]

Others can help you with the wording, but I wanted to give you my grouchy pessimistic version of a pep talk:

You are NOT a source of stability in this child's life. You are trying your best to be, but because of the grandmother's refusal to accept the service you offer on its own terms, the grandmother is destabilizing the service. The child only gets to you through the grandmother, so the grandmother holds all the cards here.

You will only be able to hit this woman in the wallet if you actually follow through on whatever you tell her. That means you make it clear: There will be no drop-off on mornings that she owes you out-of-pocket late fees. And the first morning after she picks up late? Don't let her in. Be prepared to do whatever you have to, up to and including calling the police, if she attempts to force a drop-off.

Your job here is to make your policies clear and enforce them. That gives the grandmother a chance to shape up, which is what she needs most right now: clearly established rules and somebody willing to give her a fresh start if she follows those rules. If you allow her to continue abusing you, you're allowing her to make you a participant in her continued spin out of control.

You can do it! We believe in you! happyface

[Blackcat31]

I have a daycare grandma that I need help writing a policy for. Her daughter is in jail and she has custody of her granddaughter. The state is paying her daycare. They raised her copay and cut her time back to 6 hours a day. She is constantly late and shows up an hour or two passed the 6 hours. The state told me to get her to sign something stating shes gotta pay x amount of dollars per hour that she is late or terminate her. I know that is the only way I can get her to pick up on time is to hit her wallet so to speak.She already complains about the few dollars a day she has to pay. I have tried to get her to pick up on time as I do not want her money. She is working yada yada and i'm tired of the arguments. I would term but her grand daughter would be really upset and I feel like this is the only thing stable in her life. (both parents in jail, mom got out only to go back on child endangerment charges against her) I have late fees in my contract already but i need something that after 6 hours the state is no longer covering and you are now responsible. I just can't think how to write it up.
Help

While this is commendable, it's not your place to decide.

You are a business and if grandma uses additional hours beyond what the state will pay for, she owes you for the work you have done. It's not about "saving" the child or not upsetting her. Its not your child to save or provide for. That is grandma's role and obligation to her child and grandchild.

If it's not about the money, then simply tell grandma that she MUST pick up DCG at X time or she is terminated from care. Grandma understand that concept as you said "she works" so she fully understands what a schedule is and how to follow it. She is taking advantage of you because you are allowing her to and without consequence.

So I would absolutely bill her as LATE when she goes above and beyond the state allotted 6 hours. If she doesn't like it, she can take it up with the state. It has nothing to do with you.

I understand empathizing with the children you have in care and their families but empathy is a feeling not an action.

If you really want to "help" DCG, start making the adults in her life take responsibility for their actions and charge grandma. You'd be doing DCG a life long favor verses a temp one in simply keeping her in your program while grandma disrespects and takes advantage of you.

[jenboo]

Others can help you with the wording, but I wanted to give you my grouchy pessimistic version of a pep talk:

You are NOT a source of stability in this child's life. You are trying your best to be, but because of the grandmother's refusal to accept the service you offer on its own terms, the grandmother is destabilizing the service. The child only gets to you through the grandmother, so the grandmother holds all the cards here.

You will only be able to hit this woman in the wallet if you actually follow through on whatever you tell her. That means you make it clear: There will be no drop-off on mornings that she owes you out-of-pocket late fees. And the first morning after she picks up late? Don't let her in. Be prepared to do whatever you have to, up to and including calling the police, if she attempts to force a drop-off.

Your job here is to make your policies clear and enforce them. That gives the grandmother a chance to shape up, which is what she needs most right now: clearly established rules and somebody willing to give her a fresh start if she follows those rules. If you allow her to continue abusing you, you're allowing her to make you a participant in her continued spin out of control.

You can do it! We believe in you! happyface

[LysesKids]

While this is commendable, it's not your place to decide.

You are a business and if grandma uses additional hours beyond what the state will pay for, she owes you for the work you have done. It's not about "saving" the child or not upsetting her. Its not your child to save or provide for. That is grandma's role and obligation to her child and grandchild.

If it's not about the money, then simply tell grandma that she MUST pick up DCG at X time or she is terminated from care. Grandma understand that concept as you said "she works" so she fully understands what a schedule is and how to follow it. She is taking advantage of you because you are allowing her to and without consequence.

So I would absolutely bill her as LATE when she goes above and beyond the state allotted 6 hours. If she doesn't like it, she can take it up with the state. It has nothing to do with you.

I understand empathizing with the children you have in care and their families but empathy is a feeling not an action.

If you really want to "help" DCG, start making the adults in her life take responsibility for their actions and charge grandma. You'd be doing DCG a life long favor verses a temp one in simply keeping her in your program while grandma disrespects and takes advantage of you.

Knowing that area of WV quite well & having a few parents that use to pull the same thing when I lived there... YOU have to enforce late pick up fees; like Major ones, otherwise Grams will continue to pick up late... I had one that cussed me royally - I termed immediately for disrespect. WV doesn't pay enough in Subsidies to put up with the garbage some people give us.

[amberrose3dg]

Thanks guys! I don't plan on letting her walk all over me. This is the third week since her new voucher came out. She did good the first week no issues.
Last week is when it started. I might be a few minutes late etc.. Well Wednesday and Thursday she was an hour and almost 2 hours late! I told her it is not my problem. Have someone else come pick her up then! She has aunts, sisters( she's 3 with two grown sisters) uncles and another grandma. This week she has been ok so far but I wanted something in writing to give her to sign so she doesn't do it again. I will terminate care if she keeps it up or refuses to pay overages.

[amberrose3dg]

Knowing that area of WV quite well & having a few parents that use to pull the same thing when I lived there... YOU have to enforce late pick up fees; like Major ones, otherwise Grams will continue to pick up late... I had one that cussed me royally - I termed immediately for disrespect. WV doesn't pay enough in Subsidies to put up with the garbage some people give us.

They sure don't! Most of my families are private pay. I only take a small percentage of state clients. She is like my only headache now since the foster family left over the summer. She has been here since February and it is always something. She lost of her glasses and give me a big fit and found them around her house weeks later. She had the nerve to say to me I get paid for her no matter how long she is here. The state pays me like 50% of my rates. You are getting free childcare either follow the rules or leave! I am hoping by enforcing it she just leaves.

[Unregistered]

Put it on Grandma..
Grandma,
The state will only pay for 6 hours of daycare for DG. It is your responsibility both personally and financially to ensure that any hours over 6 per day are paid at a normal rate. (State rate) If you are finding that you need more than 6 hours a day then you need to get the state to approve in writing to me that they will pay for those additional hours. If you can not get the state to get that to me in writing then you will be financially responsible for any hours above those 6 each day starting immediately. Payment is expected at time of pick up for any hours above 6. If payment is not received then services will not be provided until said payment is made. While I am sympathetic to your situation, this is a business and my time and services are not free.

Daycare owner.

[amberrose3dg]

Well ladies, grandma gotta go. So she did great with pickups all last week.
Then today happens....
She has other grandma to drop off at 130 in the afternoon. No notice nothing. I don't take kids that late in the day unless I'm told about it and asked permission. I'm not taking a kid in the middle of nap time just because.
There it is no call , no communication and you think you can do whatever. Please go find a center that will cater to you.

[hwichlaz]

I understand that I am responsible for all fees not covered by DHS. DHS currently pays for 6 hours per day with a _____ co-pay. After _____pm I'll be responsible for 100% of the fees which are ______

[Ariana]

Well ladies, grandma gotta go. So she did great with pickups all last week.
Then today happens....
She has other grandma to drop off at 130 in the afternoon. No notice nothing. I don't take kids that late in the day unless I'm told about it and asked permission. I'm not taking a kid in the middle of nap time just because.
There it is no call , no communication and you think you can do whatever. Please go find a center that will cater to you.

Most people who feel entitled treat people like this. Unless there are consequences for their actions people are very unlikely to change.

[amberrose3dg]

Exactly!! I have been more than accommodating. She knows about this rule and can she even send me a text asking if it is ok? Nope. I am extremely angry and tired of it. I felt horrible sending the little girl and other grandma away. I am just done. Sorry your daughter keeps going to jail and sticking you with her kid. She needs to find a center or somewhere that will allow this. I am going to refer the center up the street to her. Tell her I am letting her go because I cannot cater to her needs and be done with it. No notice just be done.