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My daycare provider told my husband on Friday that she has chose to drop our daughter. And gave us a two week notice. The reason she said was because her friend came to her asking if she could take care of her 3 kids. And one of the kids is under 2 and my daughter is 18 months. So she said she can't have two children under the age of two. Which why she is dropping my daughter. My question is can she do that? To me it just feels wrong? My husband and I just don't think she can or should do that. And it was so out of the blue and has left my husband and I scrambling to find care. Help! Can she do this?
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Is it legal? Sure. Is it ethical? Have no idea and it doesn't really matter. If she followed her own contract according to giving you notice, etc., there isn't anything at all you can do. Accept it and find someone else.
I hope you find someone who is twice as good, kind, and loving towards your dd! -
I'm a long time MN provider.
I can decide to term a family for whatever reason I want.
I don't even have to tell them a reason.
How I term (notice/no notice etc) should be clearly written in contract though..Comment
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Yes, she can terminate as she chooses.
She may find it a mistake, though. Many providers find out doing business with friends doesn't work out in the long run.Comment
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Yes it's legal.
When you decide to leave your next provider remember this. Can you imagine her believing you pulling your child is illegal?
What notice time does she require of you?
She's just doing what she believes is best for her family and business. Parents do what's best for their family. Providers do the same.Comment
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:hug: It's always a shock when a child we love is pulled from our care, and it happens for various reasons. Parents find care that is closer to home, parents find cheaper care, parents find relatives to watch child, etc.
I imagine it's equally a shock when we choose to term a family.
For what it's worth, watching the children of friends and family almost always ends up bad. Take a little comfort in the fact that a few months from now, that provider will most likely be regretting her decision, but will be stuck and unable to do anything because that family takes up 3 spots of income. That's a bad place to be in.Comment
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Thank you all! Yes I understand it is legal. But as a parent and even someone who works with children too I don't think it is ethical. To chose to help out friends and throw out another child to make it work does not seem right. Legal yes but not ethical in my mind. And I'm thinking of my daughter who is going to have to go through a adjusting to a new place and routine. She has been with the same lady since she was 7 months so it will be hard.Comment
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At first you asked if it is legal. I'm glad you understand it is now. Your understanding means you get that she is self employed and can choose her own clients.
It is ethical too. From what you haven't said... meaning she contracted to give you more than two weeks... then she could ethically terminate because she didn't like the color of your car.
There's a good chance she termed for different reasons but found this story to be what she thought would cause the least amount of conflict. She may not be experienced enough to know that parents want to be the one who breaks up with the provider. They don't want the provider to break up with them. Any reason she gives isn't going to go well.
In truth your child hasn't been there very long. After you change daycares and as she grows you will see this as a mere blip in her childhood. I've had kids leave for preschool that I had for four YEARS and I never considered the parents to be behaving not ethically because they did what they thought was best for their kid and family.
If you are paying a high tuition, pay on time, have stable attendance, and follow the rules, you will find daycare quickly.
If you are paying a low amount for long hours that are stable or unstable, it may take more than two weeks to replicate the placement you had with her. The length of time for parents to find daycare is dependent on those main factors imo.
Let me ask you something. If you had an offer from a friend who lived closely to you to take care of your child for free for a year, would you give notice and take your kid for free to someone you really liked and liked your kid? Would you put your child thru the change for that awesome deal? Would it be ethical? Would it be fair to the provider?Comment
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I enrolled a 3 child family when their previous provider terminated care because she needed 1 of their spots for a family member . So it does happen .Comment
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Getting rejected hurts. You want to understand why, and you want to be understood by the person who rejected you.
Unfortunately, that kind of closure is usually impossible. You cannot force another person to regard you the way you want to be regarded. Once a care provider has given notice of termination, you're better off putting your energy into moving on. After all, the harder you push back, the more bad feelings they'll have toward you--you don't want to twist somebody's arm until they agree to care for your child! That'd be a terrible situation for your child to be in.Comment
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Well, you could offer to pay her for the 3 spots instead of your 1 spot. But, I'm thinking that's probably not likely.
Just as families need to make the right choice when it comes to their own family situations and finances, childcare providers do too.
Most of the time, it's not personal, just business.Comment
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Just like how you can terminate care for any reason you want, she can terminate for any reason she wants. She doesnt HAVE to take care of your child.Comment
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Yes, she can do this, just like you could submit your two week notice if you had a family friend offer to watch your child for a better price or hours. It is business, not personal. It is ethical to make business choices that help you succeed, just like it is ethical to make decisions about your childcare that are best for you. It stinks to have to move on, but consider it a positive thing and a chance for a fresh start. Good luck to you and your family!Comment
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While it is frustrating if she only requires two weeks notice from you she would only give two weeks notice.
If she were to tell you on Friday and not allow the child on Monday then that would be unethical to me but she is giving you notice.Comment
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I'm betting that she had two full-time openings in her daycare and was having a hard time making her bills because of it. This was an opportunity to be full and take care of her own family's financial needs.Comment
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