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My drop in is $50 a day and I feel guilty charging my friend. She wants to drop in. Last time I didn't charge her. But, I specifically said, "no charge today, but we'll figure out something for forure drop ins"... So now it's the future, and I need to tell her $50, but I feel so guilty. I was in her wedding for Peet's sake! Should I just let it go and do free? I do have to feed him snack, lunch, snack. I mean even if my service of child care were given freely, I need food money, right? :/ Idk. I feel like a bad friend. And of course, you all know, it's the whole single mom story as well. Not that she ever said that. I just know, obviously, since she is my friend.
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Does she ever watch your kids for you? Or do things for you without charging?
I charge my friends for daycare if they are contracting me while they are at work. But for occasional drop in so they can get a much needed day to themselves, I do not. BUT, these are the same people that helped me move houses, that watch my kid on occasion, or fix my computer in their shop and refuse to charge me etc.
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Oh my gosh. You're so right. She never does anything for me actually! I used to just always say no to watching her kids because Everytime I would ask her to watch mine, she couldn't. Every time for years. So, anyway I guess now that she just moved out and separated from her husband, I felt like I should be helpful. But, yeah, I kinda forgot how she literally never does me any favors. I just know she works and she has three kids so she can't fit my kids in her car, and her place is small, etc. So I always make excuses for her in my own head. She doesn't give excuses. I do it to myself
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If you are watching her kid(s) during your business hours, charge her. This is your business and you need to treat it as such. Watching her kids during the weekend or during non-business hours, is personal and you can choose to do what you want at that time. But I highly recommend keeping business and personal completely separate.Comment
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If she gets free daycare it will sour your relationship for sure! Don't do anything for anyone for free unless you can live with it and hold no resentment ever.
If she never does things for you she might be a user. Friends can be users!! One of my best friends is a user and I am the sort of person that goes out of my way for friends. I really had to reign it in with her because I started to resent her.Comment
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This goes both ways....
She should feel like a bad friend if she expects care for free!
My friend owns a beauty salon. I would never in a million years think that she should provide hair coloring/cutting etc for free.
The perks for me from her come in other ways...such as I know she is doing a wonderful job and will happily listen to what I am trying to do (style and/or cut) and is great company while I'm there.
The perks for you friend should be the comfort in knowing someone that truly cares about her/her child is caring for them....you can't buy that kind of security.
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This goes both ways....
She should feel like a bad friend if she expects care for free!
My friend owns a beauty salon. I would never in a million years think that she should provide hair coloring/cutting etc for free.
The perks for me from her come in other ways...such as I know she is doing a wonderful job and will happily listen to what I am trying to do (style and/or cut) and is great company while I'm there.
The perks for you friend should be the comfort in knowing someone that truly cares about her/her child is caring for them....you can't buy that kind of security.
Yep.
Dh is a plumber/contractor. The amount of 'friends' and relatives that want free work is INSANE. Parts and time aren't free people. He DOES give them huge discounts, and very rarely charges for labor (unless he sends and employee, he can't take a loss) but we have lost 'friends' before who were angry about him charging ANYTHING.
I NEVER watch friends/families kids. EVER.Comment
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Yeah. I just couldn't tell if I was being obnoxious charging. Thanks.. I think I will tell her it's $50. Also I'm high priced. So, I feel bad! I really do a lot for any one. I never really care except I did reign it in for her long ago when she never would reciprocate. It's like, I've been so programmed to please, growing up I guess, that it's a very strong urge to suppress!Comment
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I think we have isolated your issue. Projection. :hug:
Take a cue from your friend and tell her what you can and can't do. She has told you no many, many times and you are still her friend. Give her the same opportunity to prove herself to you.
- Unless otherwise stated, all my posts are personal opinion and worth what you paid for them.
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I had a friend that wanted me to give her a discount. And I almost did. But then I thought to myself, "What friend would ask that? This is my business and my livelihood." I almost felt guilty for charging her full price, but she had no issue asking me to devalue myself and my business. So, no. I didn't give her a discount. I just said, "Sorry, I can't. I have to stick to my prices in order to provide the best care I can to my kids." She understood. She didn't sign on with me. But that's OK by me. We are still friends, so no bad blood.
I'm higher priced, too. But I really feel that people get what they pay for. If they don't want to pay my prices, OK by me. Moving on. And true friends understand that it's not personal. It's strictly business.Comment
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If I need the $, I'll give a discount. But never free. I charged a friend $40 for 4 hours for her 2 kids. Not bad.Comment
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I texted her it was $50 and she replied that she really wanted to support me (as in my business, I guess) but she couldn't afford that. She also said she would have her S.O. do the care. So, I guess it's all good .... And she apparently could have gotten SO to do it anyway... Mmmhmm.
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Perfectly handledI texted her it was $50 and she replied that she really wanted to support me (as in my business, I guess) but she couldn't afford that. She also said she would have her S.O. do the care. So, I guess it's all good .... And she apparently could have gotten SO to do it anyway... Mmmhmm.Comment
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