DCM Texted And Asked Last Night If Child Got Injury But I Didn't Notice

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  • trix23
    New Daycare.com Member
    • Apr 2014
    • 525

    DCM Texted And Asked Last Night If Child Got Injury But I Didn't Notice

    DCB is about 2 years old and his mom texted me last night asking if he fell and I replied back "I didn't see him fall or get any boo-boos. We only had outside time in the morning today. Why do you ask?"

    And she said that he had a bump on his head and that his lip was cut and bleeding on the inside! :confused:

    I said "omg really!? Is he ok??"

    She said that he's fine but I feel awful not knowing how it happened. And she told me that one of their biggest problems with a provider is not informing of injuries. I changed DCB's diaper at 5pm and didn't notice any injuries.... just seems odd. And this family is new. :/
  • childcaremom
    Advanced Daycare.com Member
    • May 2013
    • 2955

    #2
    Originally posted by trix23
    DCB is about 2 years old and his mom texted me last night asking if he fell and I replied back "I didn't see him fall or get any boo-boos. We only had outside time in the morning today. Why do you ask?"

    And she said that he had a bump on his head and that his lip was cut and bleeding on the inside! :confused:

    I said "omg really!? Is he ok??"

    She said that he's fine but I feel awful not knowing how it happened. And she told me that one of their biggest problems with a provider is not informing of injuries. I changed DCB's diaper at 5pm and didn't notice any injuries.... just seems odd. And this family is new. :/
    I would just reiterate that you will inform dcm of any injuries that occur while in your care. And then drop it.

    If she continues to push, well I would rethink whether I would continue to work with a family that didn't trust the care I was providing their child.

    Because I think you would notice if a child injured himself that much (bump on head + bleeding lip = at least some tears).

    Comment

    • bklsmum
      Daycare.com Member
      • Feb 2014
      • 565

      #3
      I'd be questioning if that happened at home personally. I think I would notice something like that and the kiddo definitely would have cried or drooled the blood at the very least and cut lips bleed a lot even if a little cut.

      Comment

      • bklsmum
        Daycare.com Member
        • Feb 2014
        • 565

        #4
        Also, what time did she text?

        Comment

        • trix23
          New Daycare.com Member
          • Apr 2014
          • 525

          #5
          6:31pm and her hubby picked up about 6pm. Said they are going through relationship problems and are getting divorced.

          Comment

          • bklsmum
            Daycare.com Member
            • Feb 2014
            • 565

            #6
            Originally posted by trix23
            6:31pm and her hubby picked up about 6pm. Said they are going through relationship problems and are getting divorced.
            If it was still bleeding then I can't see it happening it your house if they didn't clearly see it at pick up. JMHO.

            Comment

            • trix23
              New Daycare.com Member
              • Apr 2014
              • 525

              #7
              I notice everything and i didn't see it, so I'm kinda wondering ??

              Comment

              • e.j.
                Daycare.com Member
                • Dec 2010
                • 3738

                #8
                Probably stating the obvious but my guess would be that either he got hurt while Dad had him and Dad is afraid to tell his wife for fear she might try to use it against him during divorce/child custody proceedings or he got hurt while in Mom's care and she's trying to deflect blame for similar reasons or she wants to cast blame on her husband so she can claim he's an unfit parent. I would think you would have noticed the kind of injuries she described if it had happened on your watch.

                Comment

                • Ariana
                  Advanced Daycare.com Member
                  • Jun 2011
                  • 8969

                  #9
                  She is likely just trying to figure out if it happened at your house or when he was with dad, especially in a divorce situation. I think if it were me, I would ask the dad if DCB fell down or something yesterday after leaving your house and tell him you got a text from mom and are trying tomfigure out what happened. Just play it up like you are overly concerned with DCB and how he got his injuries. If dad is blaming you for injuries that is not good!

                  Comment

                  • trix23
                    New Daycare.com Member
                    • Apr 2014
                    • 525

                    #10
                    Yeah, if I see him today I'll ask. DCB has had fall injuries before andI write up an incident report for it if so. I'm professional about it and honest about what happened, even if I'm at fault (like I bumped them over while walking or something similar)

                    Comment

                    • daycarediva
                      Daycare.com Member
                      • Jul 2012
                      • 11698

                      #11
                      Originally posted by e.j.
                      Probably stating the obvious but my guess would be that either he got hurt while Dad had him and Dad is afraid to tell his wife for fear she might try to use it against him during divorce/child custody proceedings or he got hurt while in Mom's care and she's trying to deflect blame for similar reasons or she wants to cast blame on her husband so she can claim he's an unfit parent. I would think you would have noticed the kind of injuries she described if it had happened on your watch.
                      Yup. No way a kid bumped his head and cut the inside of his lip- and it was STILL bleeding at 6:30 and not only did he not cry, you didn't notice AND they didn't notice at pick up.

                      Comment

                      • Blackcat31
                        • Oct 2010
                        • 36124

                        #12
                        Originally posted by trix23
                        DCB is about 2 years old and his mom texted me last night asking if he fell and I replied back "I didn't see him fall or get any boo-boos. We only had outside time in the morning today. Why do you ask?"

                        And she said that he had a bump on his head and that his lip was cut and bleeding on the inside! :confused:

                        I said "omg really!? Is he ok??"

                        She said that he's fine but I feel awful not knowing how it happened. And she told me that one of their biggest problems with a provider is not informing of injuries. I changed DCB's diaper at 5pm and didn't notice any injuries.... just seems odd. And this family is new. :/
                        Call me jaded but that bolded statement bothers me.

                        He's 2...how many other provider's has she experienced and had that type of problem with?

                        It just seems like something someone would say because they are trying to blame daycare. Also since she is going through a divorce with DCD, it comes across as she is setting the stage for something.

                        I definitely hope I am wrong. It's not a very nice thing to assume but as a provider I despise being accused of something like that by a parent that IF truly having trust issues in regards to providers not being transparent about injuries, you'd think her behavior both at pick up and drop off would demonstrate that.

                        Does she question every little red spot, scratch and mark on his body when picking up? or does she show you those things at drop off? Those types of behaviors come from parents that have trust issues or have had bad experiences with a provider not being forthcoming about injuries.

                        IMHO, if the statement about the topic being a problem for her seems to be out of the blue, then I think something else is brewing here...

                        Comment

                        • daycare
                          Advanced Daycare.com *********
                          • Feb 2011
                          • 16259

                          #13
                          Originally posted by Blackcat31
                          Call me jaded but that bolded statement bothers me.

                          He's 2...how many other provider's has she experienced and had that type of problem with?

                          It just seems like something someone would say because they are trying to blame daycare. Also since she is going through a divorce with DCD, it comes across as she is setting the stage for something.

                          I definitely hope I am wrong. It's not a very nice thing to assume but as a provider I despise being accused of something like that by a parent that IF truly having trust issues in regards to providers not being transparent about injuries, you'd think her behavior both at pick up and drop off would demonstrate that.

                          Does she question every little red spot, scratch and mark on his body when picking up? or does she show you those things at drop off? Those types of behaviors come from parents that have trust issues or have had bad experiences with a provider not being forthcoming about injuries.

                          IMHO, if the statement about the topic being a problem for her seems to be out of the blue, then I think something else is brewing here...
                          BC when I read that, that was my first thought as well. A lot seems to be going on with what this mother has told you.

                          Kid bumped head, split lip, parents are getting a divorce...etc etc etc. If dad picked him up, dad would have seen it. So why didn't she ask dad why he didn't say anything to you??

                          I would proceed with caution with this family. from now on, when kid comes in do a full body check, do the same going out and do it in front of the parents. Don't let them leave until you have done it. I made a family do this with me after they said their kid got a bruise on his stomach from my house. After about two weeks of it the parents asked me to drop it and that they didn't feel it was necessary. I had to put the family in check, they are still here. No my favorite family, but they have learned my personality and styles and I think a lot of it was them being new and trust.

                          Maybe tell the mom, sorry you had trust issues with your last DCP, but if you can't trust me to do my job, I can't provide services.

                          Comment

                          • Leigh
                            Daycare.com Member
                            • Apr 2013
                            • 3814

                            #14
                            Originally posted by bklsmum
                            I'd be questioning if that happened at home personally. I think I would notice something like that and the kiddo definitely would have cried or drooled the blood at the very least and cut lips bleed a lot even if a little cut.
                            It didn't happen at your house. Cut lips DO bleed a lot, and there is no way that you or DCD wouldn't have seen it. The bleeding would have subsided within 30 minutes, as well.

                            Comment

                            • DaveA
                              Daycare.com Member and Bladesmith
                              • Jul 2014
                              • 4245

                              #15
                              I agree with the PPs saying something is fishy about this. I'd be really careful with this DCF.

                              Comment

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