Afraid Of Men?

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  • daycarediva
    Daycare.com Member
    • Jul 2012
    • 11698

    #16
    Originally posted by JackandJill
    I have a child like this! It isn't just my husband either, if a dcd drops off/picks up, she gets teared up and hugs my leg. I don't think its abuse, I think some kids are just super shy.

    I have never paid too much attention to it, because I don't want to inadvertently encourage the behavior.

    Would love to hear what others say!
    I have had three girls in my care that were simply petrified of ANY man. It was incredibly unnerving.

    One was an otherwise very outgoing child. She had been abused by her father. Mom left the state to get away from him.

    The other was a very reserved child, dcm said she was just timid about everyone- which I saw to be true, she would cry when grandparents (grandma OR grandpa) came to pick her up and when ANY parent came in the door she would climb me like a monkey. Over the course of a year grew to just love my dh, though. She had to hug him when he came in or left, would joke around and let him help her, didn't mind when he was my back up, etc. I ended up making a call as she got older and started playing inappropriately, making very unusual comments, etc. They did investigate, and the next week, dcm came in with her parents, gave two weeks notice and let us say goodbye to dcg. Her dh (dcg's step father) had been abusing her. They were together and married AFTER dcg started- so she was already timid or who knows, possibly abused previous to that situation.

    The other little one was (still IS, really-now SA) scared to death of men. She's a timid, shy, very reserved, quiet little mouse, and doing a LITTLE better now with school and all the male teachers she has pretty much had to get used to. Dcm actually approached me about it, and brought her to see a child psychologist.

    With the ASTRONOMICALLY HIGH abuse rates, I would rather make the call and be wrong, than not make it.

    Comment

    • Ariana
      Advanced Daycare.com Member
      • Jun 2011
      • 8969

      #17
      Do you think this warrants a call? Just by the fact that she is afraid of men and is not sleeping at home?

      She is very fond of her dad which is why this throws me for a loop. She does have lots of relatives that have access to her though with plenty of sleepovers.

      She is very clingy when she is here with me. I have to be with her at all times or she gets upset and will cry (even if DH is not around). She seems super super anxious. Bites all of her nails down to the quick type of anxiety.

      I have always had a sneaking suspicion that there is something going on at that house and my spidey sense mainly points to mom. The baby is refusing to eat food and they waited 4 days to take him to the DR when he had a fever of 105! Mom took a spa day during this time. Something is just not right

      Comment

      • Mike
        starting daycare someday
        • Jan 2014
        • 2507

        #18
        I would definitely call. Like BC said
        "Once the proper agency is aware, they decide the next steps, if any."

        We don't like to get involved in this type of thing, but we may be the only ones who can stop it.
        Children are little angels, even when they are little devils.
        They are also our future.

        Comment

        • MOM OF 4
          Jack of All Trades
          • Jul 2014
          • 306

          #19
          I hope you either called OR Will call. I have had to make the call twice. Once, a boy was being physically abused the next time, a girl was being abused sexually. Her NEXT daycare reported to me a horrible incident that happened and so then we BOTH called again. It was horrible but necessary in both cases. That was 2 in 12 yrs. The ONLY way a child has a voice at this age is through a trusted adult that gives them one.

          Call if you have a suspicion something ain't right. If ur wrong, NOTHING will happen. BUT IF YOU'RE RIGHT, the child will get assistance.

          Best of luck

          Comment

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