DCM Asks To Skip 2 Weeks Of Payment To Catch Up On Money

[Mom2Two]

I picked up a handful of state assist brochures a few days ago. My plan is to hand out one of those if I'm ever asked for charity. In most cases, either they can cut expenses or they qualify for the state assistance.

[CathyVarnell]

Your husband is right; it's a business. I know it's difficult for some parents at times, but because you are watching their children, it is allowing them to work to make the money they have. They cannot go to the grocery store and say I cannot pay for this food, but I am going to take it. They cannot fill up their car with gas and say they are unable to pay for it. It is so hard to be stern with parents about payment, but you have expenses of your own. It took me over 10 years to get a backbone when it comes to collecting money, but I am glad I did. Maybe you can ask her to pay at least part of her balance. Even $20 is better than $0.

[pritbrit@optonline.net]

Another point

I have had my business for 21 years. Yes, I have been in your shoes and lost money but at the same time you have a heart and thats why you are here asking for opinions. If she has been a good customer, her kid is good and you cant afford to lose her is it worth it to say no? If you dont have a waiting list chances of you filling the spot quickly is pretty slim isnt it? Just my opinion try negotiating something with her. We all have been in a hard place before and sometimes you just need a little boost to get you back on track. I am not saying let her come for free but how about discuss something along the lines of...I'm really sorry as much as I would love to tell you yes I financially can't do it. How about for the next two weeks you pay half then the third week we go back to normal with the full amount and 25% of the first week payback, then week four normal payment and the balance of week 1, then week 5 full payment and 25% of 2nd week reduction and final week 6 full payment and balance (25%) of 2nd week missed. If you put it all in writing at least you wont lose the kid. You have to go with your gut. Do you think she will pull immediately and you will get stuck then don't do it. However if you feel that she has always been a good customer and just needs a little break I would do it.

[lovemykidstoo]

Please do what your gut is telling you to. I have a feeling you're torn because you're trying to make her happy along with your family. It's hard for you because you're a caring individual. However, we can get stung too. I had a mom one time get her hours cut and what we did was have her bring her son part time and her family watched him for free the rest of the time. The deal we had though was if I got someone else during this time, then he had to come back full time with full pay or lose the spot. It ended up working out, she got her hours back. Is there anyone that can watch her child for free and then have him come to you for as much time as she can afford? Did you have your interview yet with the other family and have you talked to her yet?

[Crazy8]

Daycare is not a charity.

I wonder if she'd be willing to suspend her internet or cell service for a period of time instead....

It's disheartening that child care providers are the first one's asked when in reality, you can still work if you don't have cell or internet but you can't work if you don't have child care services so I will never understand this thought process in regards to parents.....

@OP ~ if you are unable to make this arrangement with the mom, simply say no. You are NOT wrong for being honest and not being able to take the cut in pay.

Bolded is sooo true!! Mom probably wouldn't think of cancelling her $200/m cable but will come asking us for some leeway.
Different situation but I had a mom crying to me about how she's so behind at work and getting looks for leaving on time to get to me by my closing time - basically asking for an extra half hour for free. I stood firm and said sorry I couldn't do that but she is welcome to come earlier in the morning (she shows up an hour after I open, usually running very late for work). Funny how I haven't heard a peep about it since.
People often want US to make all the sacrifices for them.

[Mike]

People often want US to make all the sacrifices for them.

I used to be bad at that. I got it from my father. Back when I was a kid, he owned a garage and his customers would get to know him, get friendly with him, then start asking for financial favors because they couldn't afford the gas or work on their vehicle. He would of course be mr nice guy, until the day came he declared bankruptcy.

I still get taken advantage of sometimes, but have learned to cut back. I need to make sure that when I start my daycare, I stay professional. I can't do favors, can I? ::

[nannyde]

Was she planning on bringing the kids during the "two weeks"?

Remember when parents are asking not to pay they are really asking to borrow money. You don't ask a service provider to borrow money. You go to your family, friends, church, whatever... but not your child care provider.

It sounds to me like she wants to bring the kids and not pay or pull the kids for the two weeks and hold a spot without paying. Either one is not workable.

You need to look inside yourself to see what made her think she could ask something like this. Always stress the importance of payment and contracted notice throughout the relationship so they understand you want to get paid and don't hold spots for free.

I would just tell her that you can't loan her the money for child care for two weeks. It's not something you offer in your business. Nothing personal... but like most other businesses, you don't offer services for free when customers come on hard times.

If you have a contract, remind her she is obligated to give her notice time if she is going to pull the child and pay for it regardless of attendance.

[Unregistered]

UPDATE:

She's gone. Silly me. I offered to watch him for one more week so she could find someone, which idk who, because who is going to watch him for free, etc. (I know, not my problem, but I am a softie and I know there's a whole situation going on with dcb and his dad coming in and out of the picture. I don't know if in hindsight I was hoping to give him some sort of consistency or what....). I never felt forced or obligated, just...sympathetic? anyway, guess who was a no call no show after agreeing to take me up on the offer? Then today, I saw she posted on facebook as her status about the struggle of going to Target just to return things only to leave with 3 bags full of stuff..........

So! lesson learned. From here on out, I keep it professional only. No more fb friends, no more chatty cathy at pick up/drop off. No more favors. Sure, I can be nice and congenial, but I don't need to be doing favors or be best friends with these people.

Thank you everyone for your insight and advice.

[happymom]

Sorry to hear. Hope you can fill the spot quickly :hug:

[Lil_Diddle]

When I first started out within the first year, I had a family that was really good about policies and unfortunately DCD lost his job. They asked for a discount. It is really hard to try and forget that these are families as well just trying to get by. I also didn't want to be a pushover because in all of my years working in daycares I seen parents take advantage and rack up bills. I created my handbook by looking at the faults I found in the centers I had worked at. I ended up not giving the family a discount but I did allow them to do a 3 month part time contract. The kids still had to come three days a week and be picked up by 3pm. Plenty of time for dad to fill out applications and go on interviews. I didn't want him bringing the kids at a discount all week and him going home to nap all day. We wrote up a contract and I emphasized I could only afford to provide part time care for two spots for 3 months. Luckily, before the 3 months was up he found a good job and the DCK's came back full time.

I had a family that fell into temporary hard times a couple of years ago. I discounted their rate for 2 months down to $15/day/child. I explained to them that I could NOT watch them for free because I would end up spending my own money for the privilege of caring for their children. It DOES cost you money to care for kids, so there's no way you should do it for nothing. I don't regret offering the temporary discount, but I doubt I'd do it again-I need my full rate. I can't justify taking money from my family to give to theirs.

[Pandaluver21]

I have done something similar for 2 parents.
1- Parent has a very unsteady paycheck. She could get a large check one month, then go a few months without one. She never made this my problem, and actually helped me out several times when she got a big check by paying me a few weeks in advance. She asked (no obligation or guilt) if she could wait a week or so until her check came in. She wrote a check and asked if I could hold it. At the time I was able to do so and LOVED this family and knew she wouldn't pull anything. She was able to get her check the following week and things turned out great.
2- Parent was on an internship the first two weeks, then would get a pay check after that. Had payment plans in place, dotted every i, crossed every t. She made payments after the first wo weeks to start to include the unpaid time. Then her and her husband separated, she got kicked out, etc. Things fell more and more behind. I felt sympathy for the kids so I let it happen. Ended up having to terminate and take the issue to court. Won and got my first "payment" from her last month.. $25. This happened 2 years go..