How To Be A Firm Teacher?

[vivivi113]

I work in different classroom now. When I work with older children, I feel like I am not firm enough because they act out sometimes; but when I work with younger children, I feel like I am too strict because they looked scared.

How can I be a firm teacher while having a positive relationship with them??

[Unregistered]

I'm not naturally a firm teacher, so I've had to work at it. What works best for me has just been setting limits and sticking to them. You can do it and still empathize "I'm really sad that we have to put the tinker toys away now, it's not safe to fight with the sticks. We'll try to Remer that next time" works for me. If they try to argue I repeat the statement and change the subject. If they get upset and have a tantrum they can sit apart until they calm down. If they begin to act destructive or get too loud I ask an assistant to take them out to the hallway.

[Indoorvoice]

For me, being firm means I stick to my rules and boundaries. Not necessarily that I yell or talk down to them. My favorite phrase is "I won't let you____" It gets my point across without yelling and then I stick to the consequence that goes with it.

[Blackcat31]

For me, being firm means I stick to my rules and boundaries. Not necessarily that I yell or talk down to them. My favorite phrase is "I won't let you____" It gets my point across without yelling and then I stick to the consequence that goes with it.

I agree! Firm means consistent it doesn't mean yelling or having to raise your voice.

[racemom]

I'm not naturally a firm teacher, so I've had to work at it. What works best for me has just been setting limits and sticking to them. You can do it and still empathize "I'm really sad that we have to put the tinker toys away now, it's not safe to fight with the sticks. We'll try to Remer that next time" works for me. If they try to argue I repeat the statement and change the subject. If they get upset and have a tantrum they can sit apart until they calm down. If they begin to act destructive or get too loud I ask an assistant to take them out to the hallway.

This^^^ I am currently going through social emotional training, and am surprised how effective it is. Also, catch them being good. Reward good behavior and try to ignore those who are struggling, when they see the attention and praise is given to those who listen, they will try to please you.

[Ariana]

Calm and assertive, not angry and mean! I have great relationships with kids because they respect me and I am a very assertive, firm person. I have healthy boundaries for behavior and if they don't adhere to those boundaries there are consequences.

I will give a good example: I was a new teacher at a centre and many of the kids did not respect me. I was in charge of the gross motor room one day and at the end a couple of boys wouldn't help me clean up. They made it very difficult for me. The next day I would not allow them in my room. I remained very firm. One boy started to cry and then I knew I had them. I wasn't angry I simply said "Remember yesterday when you wouldn't help me clean up? I do not hold places for people who are not going to help me clean up" and I left it at that. I let them stew for about 10 minutes and then I called them over and asked them if they wanted a second chance. They said yes and I never had a problem after thst day. Due to the fact that everyone saw this I gained a lot of respect from many kids just by doing that simple thing.

Giving consequences and following through while also being fair (giving them a second chance to do the right thing) is super important.