Pre-K Boyfriend/Girlfriend

[happymom]

Should a daycare provider encourage/discourage boyfriend/girlfriend relationships among preschool aged kids? Or just leave them be and let them do their thing?

My son has "had a girlfriend" for about a month now. They are both in the pre-k class and seeing them together, they act way more like adults than little children. They say that they love each other, hold hands, are ALWAYS together. The lunch lady told me that she's been having to separate them at meal times because they only talk to each other and do not eat their food.

It's widely known by the teachers that they are a "couple". I have had 3 different teachers tell me (not sure if they were concerned or joking) that the girl is flirty with another boy when my son is not there. I don't know what they expect... am I supposed to get upset with her that she's "cheating" on him... they're just little kids... I don't think they understand that concept AT ALL. It definitely is amusing to watch them and I think it's fine for them to explore and role play, but it seems weird that the teachers want to create drama with this "other boy".


Is it developmentally appropriate? How do you handle it in your own classrooms? Does it ever create problems?

[sharlan]

I wouldn't make an issue out of it. Things will change as they grow.

My grandson has had a "girlfriend" since preschool. They have sat together most days at lunch for 6 years now. They aren't in the same class anymore and they don't associate outside of school.

[mommyneedsadayoff]

I am not a fan of adults putting descriptions on child relationships. It seems like boys and girls cant be friends without being labeled bf/gf, even whdn they are too young to know the difference. I wouldnt make a big deal of it, but i tell my son (7) that we have friends. We dont need a gender label of it right now, so the people he likes and plays with are his friends...nothing more

[TXhomedaycare]

I am not a fan of adults putting descriptions on child relationships. It seems like boys and girls cant be friends without being labeled bf/gf, even whdn they are too young to know the difference. I wouldnt make a big deal of it, but i tell my son (7) that we have friends. We dont need a gender label of it right now, so the people he likes and plays with are his friends...nothing more

[Alwaysgreener]

I was that child, my best friend at that age was a boy. His little sister and my little brother were (just) friends, so was our parents and older siblings. The boy and I held hands even kissed once (his idea). We attended different schools, so when we started school, we started to grow apart. Our parents knew, but never did anything about it.
I never thought twice about the situation until I saw it play out in two kids in a preschool I was working at. They would have fights and break up, refuse to participate in projects together. They were, IMO, reflective the way their role models behaved.

[Ariana]

I am not a fan of adults putting descriptions on child relationships. It seems like boys and girls cant be friends without being labeled bf/gf, even whdn they are too young to know the difference. I wouldnt make a big deal of it, but i tell my son (7) that we have friends. We dont need a gender label of it right now, so the people he likes and plays with are his friends...nothing more

This. It is like the only way a male can be friends with a female is if she is a love interest. So very annoying, especially for a mom of two girls.