Child Falling Asleep During Meals...Tell Parents?

[SnowGirl]

I have DCG 1 yo whose parents recently requested she transition from unlimited daytime sleep to only 4 hours during the day. Previously, they wanted her to get the bulk of her sleep here during the day because their home life was too hectic at night for her to sleep properly.

We transitioned to two naps, two hours each. Then parents requested I transition to one nap, to occur with my 2.5 yo DD, and that DCG wake up no later than 4 pm.

Parents have been really pleased with the transition, and even told me how happy they were that DCG is falling asleep at the dinner table and/or on the couch well before bedtime because she just can't keep her eyes open.

This morning at our 9:30 snack, DCG fell asleep within seconds of being put in the highchair. When I tried to wake her, she started crying hysterically and refused to open her eyes no matter how I tried. I got her out of the high chair and washed her hands. She slept through it all.

I'm planning on just putting her to sleep and letting her catch up on obviously much needed sleep. My question: would you tell her parents? I worry that they'll think if she's sleeping too much here that she won't sleep at home and then the progress they're making on sleep at home will go away due to placebo affect...if that makes sense.

ETA - Currently DCG is my only DCK. We're moving to a new house later this month and I'm not running my full program until I get licensed over there. Therefore, I can be really flexible with my schedule and that's why I've worked with this family so much with their schedule.

[daycarediva]

1 year olds are not typically able to transition to one nap.

I would tell the parents that she's cranky and falling asleep in her highchair, and you will be putting her down upon arrival for a short cat-nap to refresh her. Tell them it may shorten her PM nap (and it might), but 2 naps at that age is ideal.

[childcaremom]

I find that btwn 15-18 mos, most are ready to do just 1 nap.

She sounds like she still needs a morning nap. My morning nappers all lay down at 8:30-9:30. If she is tired earlier than that, I would lay her down earlier. They are usually ready to lay back down with the rest of the group at 12:30.

I don't understand why she isn't sleeping at home. If they are excited that she is falling asleep at dinner time, is she not sleeping because they have no bed routine?

Honestly, I just do what I need to do during the day. I can't accomodate individual schedules for each child so work to get all the kids on the same one, or at least a complementary one. Having said that, once the morning nap is about 30 mins, or they are having a hard time settling down in the morning, I will drop the morning one, bring the afternoon one up slightly for a few weeks, and slowly push it back to our regular time. It usually takes a good month to get through the adjustment.

[laundrymom]

Will family move w you?

[SnowGirl]

Thanks everyone.

Yes, they are going with me to the new house. It's only in the next neighborhood over from where I live now.

They have always had a hard time with sleep in their house (I used to watch their ODD as well - same type of story). I think they're just really weak on sleep training. They're from an entirely different culture, they all share a room/bed. DCG is not cranky or misbehaved, so I don't really mind what happens at home. Since she's my only DCK, I also don't mind adjusting her schedule to fit her best needs. But I really like her and my DD being on the same schedule because then they can play together more.

I will try the early morning catnap and explain to the parents why I'm doing it. There's not a lot I can/want to do about their home life. They are very different from me!! (But we really get along).

ETA - I also wanted to say that getting her on the same schedule as DD is also wise to do now because in a couple of months I hope to fill my program and will need some more regularity in scheduling.

[childcaremom]

Just read your edit.

If she is going with you, I would start the schedule you want to stick with now. That way, you are only transitioning once.

I understand wanting to be flexible, but tread carefully when letting dcps control your day. (speaking from experience )

[AmyKidsCo]

If she needs sleep I'd let her sleep and not tell the parents. It could be that she's getting sick or needs to catch up from a busy night and will sleep less another day.