Terminated A Parent Today and Now the Anger Is Coming

[lovemy3littles]

I had the unfortunate job of terminating a parent today. My husband is returning to work and I have to decrease my numbers so that I can stay within ratio.

We just received an irate text from the Father voicing his displeasure with us for terminating care and that his child shouldn't be the first to go. His child was one of the last children enrolled, so first to exit. He isn't understanding this.

Frankly, this father is known for having a temper and I am very concerned of what pick up will be like. I am not a confrontational person, but will now allow him to treat us disrespectfully.

Has anyone encountered a situation like this? If so, how did you handle it? I welcome feedback and advise.

Thank you

[Denali]

Did you give them any kind of notice? Like in two weeks will be their last day of care?

[permanentvacation]

Most likely, the dad will just rant and rave, yell, and cuss. But won't really be a threat to you. However, just in case, here's my advise.

I have had a couple of irate parents. If you truly feel that anyone (daycare client or anyone else for that matter) is making you fearful at your residence, you can and should call the police immediately. Now, of course, that's if that dad or anyone else truly create a situation that is so extreme that you need to call the police.

Another thing you could try to do is try to have someone at your house especially at drop off and pick up times. Since you don't know if a parent might decide to arrive in the middle of the day, if you can get someone to be at the house with you all day until that child leaves your daycare, that would be nice. If you can, you might want to get the person who's hanging out with you be a man just in case that dad tries to become violent.

Honestly, most parents who are mad just yell at you, cuss, throw their hands around in large gestures while yelling, etc. No one has ever actually physically assaulted me. So, although you don't like confrontations, if you just stand there while he's hollering and simply say something like "I'm sorry, but I just won't be able to continue taking care of 'Johnny'." and don't really get into a big conversation. He should give up and leave after yelling a bit.

You might also want to get in the habit of having your landline (hopefully you have a landline phone) phone in your hand or right next to you all day and especially when that dad arrives at your house. Keep the door locked at all times and before you open the door to him, get your landline phone in your hand so if needed, you can quickly call 911. You can use your cell phone to call 911 if that's all you have, but cell phones sometimes send your call to a location other than your closest 911 operator and can't give the operator your home address if you're not able to do so. So you're better to use your landline.

[Daycare Insurance]

You may want to call licensing and let them know that you have an angry parent on your hands just in case the parent decides to file a false complaint against you. We see this a lot with parents who don't get their way.
Document your conversations with him. This way, if you do have to call the police or if he does make a complaint to licensing, you don't have to try to remember the conversations later.

[childcaremom]

Is your husband there with you? I would have both of you at the door, or at least have your dh nearby in case things get out of hand.

When I have been concerned in the past, I have met parents at the door, had their child dressed and ready to go so it was a quick pass off. Parent did not even come in the house. I had my phone set to record and had my home phone handy in case I needed to call someone.

I would give a heads up to licensing.

I would also be prepared, if dad acts in a threatening manner, to term immediately.

Good luck!

[EntropyControlSpecialist]

Hopefully there's no anger.