Worst DC Parent

[EntropyControlSpecialist]

1. I was newly pregnant with a high risk pregnancy, family kept bringing in sick children and saying it was because of too much granola/watermelon/candy/etc. They broke policies (or, tried to) all the time and I had enough. Mom yelled at me and slammed the door at pick up time in front of all of the children and then sent her husband here to chew me out. My husband wouldn't allow him in.

2. I was still newly pregnant with a high risk pregnancy and the behavior of a child continued escalating. I had tried to deal with it for 9 months but he was 4.5 and enjoyed hurting other children. He found it funny and it made him happy. I placed him on a behavior plan to attempt to get the parents to assist me more but he was suspended within 24 hours for 3 incidents of harming other children. The Dad then blamed me for his child's behavior (even though he did things like throw rocks at his Grandma's head outside of here which his wife let me know...) and told me he was suing me unless I gave the remainder of their tuition back. I wound up giving it back to avoid additional stress. They knew I had lost 3 babies before and needed to minimize my stress levels. We still saw him around for years after that and he always smiled, waved, and asked how we were doing. I always walked away.

3. This year...
Mother fabricated her child's abilities and the child needed one on one care. It wasn't safe for anyone for her not to have it. I terminated care, she didn't bring her back, demanded the belongings by a certain time, and I placed them on the porch so as not to have an explosive Mom around my kids. She still rang the bell and proceeded to yell at me in front of the kids at pick up time about how rude of a person I was. I told her that her e-mail sounded upset so I was making it a safe situation for my current kids by not allowing anger or yelling around them. She continued to yell.

[KiwiKids]

All off these are bad, but as a husband this one infuriates me. If someone put my pregnant wife's/ unborn child's health at risk to keep from having to take care of their own sick kid I'd have a real hard time not absolutely chewing out DCP the next time I saw them.

It was pretty unreal. I was very adamant with all my DCP's that this was a high risk pregnancy for a few reasons including gestational diabetes and I would be able to work up to delivery IF I could avoid any complications.

My husband was very upset too. It took almost two weeks for me to eat normally and have my bloodsugar balance back out. They were in their last few weeks of care because I was downsizing before baby. They opted to leave even earlier after knowing how sick I ended up getting.

[KiwiKids]

1. I was newly pregnant with a high risk pregnancy, family kept bringing in sick children and saying it was because of too much granola/watermelon/candy/etc. They broke policies (or, tried to) all the time and I had enough. Mom yelled at me and slammed the door at pick up time in front of all of the children and then sent her husband here to chew me out. My husband wouldn't allow him in.

2. I was still newly pregnant with a high risk pregnancy and the behavior of a child continued escalating. I had tried to deal with it for 9 months but he was 4.5 and enjoyed hurting other children. He found it funny and it made him happy. I placed him on a behavior plan to attempt to get the parents to assist me more but he was suspended within 24 hours for 3 incidents of harming other children. The Dad then blamed me for his child's behavior (even though he did things like throw rocks at his Grandma's head outside of here which his wife let me know...) and told me he was suing me unless I gave the remainder of their tuition back. I wound up giving it back to avoid additional stress. They knew I had lost 3 babies before and needed to minimize my stress levels. We still saw him around for years after that and he always smiled, waved, and asked how we were doing. I always walked away.

3. This year...
Mother fabricated her child's abilities and the child needed one on one care. It wasn't safe for anyone for her not to have it. I terminated care, she didn't bring her back, demanded the belongings by a certain time, and I placed them on the porch so as not to have an explosive Mom around my kids. She still rang the bell and proceeded to yell at me in front of the kids at pick up time about how rude of a person I was. I told her that her e-mail sounded upset so I was making it a safe situation for my current kids by not allowing anger or yelling around them. She continued to yell.

Oh man! My four pregnancies were all high risk and knowing you are supposed to be low stress and then having DCP's be so impossible... It is the worst feeling.

[Hunni Bee]

Hmmm....

Can't decide between the creeper dad who made sexually and racially inappropriate comments, stood around watching us all day and creeped me out so bad I started having nightmares about him...

...or the aunt with custody of one of most challenging children ever who made rude comments about our director and daycare, then aggressively confronted us about it in front of dc parents and children. This woman also once picked her kid up, sat in the parking lot for an hour on the phone, and then sent the 5-year-old back across the parking lot and into the building alone for a snack when she got hungry.

Perhaps the parents of a little girl who came for a week, screamed every day all day and then suddenly on Friday when their copay was due...accused us of slapping the the nonverbal child and threatened us with physical harm

Or maybe the parents who said their children's severe aggression, sexually inappropriate behavior, rage disorder and health issues were all the result of my ineptitude as a teacher.

Somewhere in there.

[e.j.]

All I can say is WOW after reading all of these replies.
I don't know how some of you put up with all that you did for so long. Makes for eye-opening stories to share on here and many learning experiences. I think you all should be writing books!!

I was going to share but after reading these, I've got nothing. My dcparents have all been creme de la creme dcfs. Thanking my lucky stars too.lovethis

I was thinking the same thing! I've had my share of dc parents that drove me crazy for various reasons but none were as bad as the ones described here! You all make me feel very grateful for the dc families I've had over the years!

[lovemydaycare0912]

None of mine were as bad as these yet I've only been open 1.5 yrs. Here goes my list:

1- mom of 2 only spoke Spanish just moved in across the street was waiting for her military assistance to kick in. I offered discount until then, (bad idea I now know) but she got so upset when she found out that I wouldn't give her a discount on top of her assistance. So upset that she had her husband call me from Afghanistan while he was fighting down there to threaten me.
2- of course you all know my 1st family who tried calling all the shots. Last straw was when she accused me of depriving her child from a meal yet she always came after breakfast was over. Once I termed her, she waited 5 or 6 weeks to file a complaint with my state office.

That's about it.

[daycarediva]

There are so many!

The dcp who sent me DOZENS of texts all night long when her kid got a stomach bug accusing me of giving him food poisoning.

The dcp who baby wore 24/7 (even to shower, sleep, etc) and expected me to do the same. He screamed blood murder the entire time he was here, from open to close, for months before I termed. That was also the last infant I ever took.

The dcp who tried to accuse me/my dc children of sexually abusing her child to protect the actual abuser.

The dcp who tried to cover up abuse as a car accident and drop off dck.

The dcg who has a dog bite so severe there was a hole in her cheek and parents refused to bring her to the ER.

The dcp who lied for months about being at work, even FORGING signatures on her forms for the hours I billed the state for. I ended up having to repay a TON of money.

[Annalee]

There are some close races for the worst at my daycare, but the one who asked me to use a medicine dropper to get her child to drink breastmilk because he wouldn't take a bottle was definitely the worst experience I ever had. This battle went on for 3 months and ended in an abrupt termination. No way was I letting her work out a two week notice. She had some way out there ideas about parenting.

[Unregistered]

Mine worst would be a new parent who sent the police to my house after she picked up claiming that all the children were home alone with no adults.probally to get out of paying

[EntropyControlSpecialist]

Mine worst would be a new parent who sent the police to my house after she picked up claiming that all the children were home alone with no adults.probally to get out of paying

Ohh. I think that a police issue was my worst one, too.

Last winter a Mom was going to be late dropping off (the door locks when the drop off window is closed and I will not answer any longer). She was speeding here, a police officer turned on his lights and began chasing her, she was flying over the median to avoid him, and when he finally caught up with her she was leaving a voicemail on my phone saying don't worry, she would be here soon to take care of her son, call an ambulance, etc. Her son was IN THE CAR WITH HER. She told the police officer that her son was having seizures in my home and that she had to race to get here. She then texted telling me to not answer the door and the police officer was "acting weird." I heard knocks at the door shortly after and thinking it was her didn't answer. It was actually an ambulance. The police officer had sent a firetruck and ambulance here because he thought it odd that I hadn't requested them (he called it all in). Then more knocks came a bit later. I answered and it was the police officer. He checked my sign in log, read the text, listened to the voicemail and then pursued the Mom. My licensor then showed up right after for my yearly surprise inspection that had NOTHING to do with this incident. I began crying because of the stress and she gave me a hug.
I terminated them effective immediately and my licensor said I NEEDED to.

[childcaremom]

to a lot of these stories.

Mine were bad. Some of these are just awful.

[KiwiKids]

Ohh. I think that a police issue was my worst one, too.

Last winter a Mom was going to be late dropping off (the door locks when the drop off window is closed and I will not answer any longer). She was speeding here, a police officer turned on his lights and began chasing her, she was flying over the median to avoid him, and when he finally caught up with her she was leaving a voicemail on my phone saying don't worry, she would be here soon to take care of her son, call an ambulance, etc. Her son was IN THE CAR WITH HER. She told the police officer that her son was having seizures in my home and that she had to race to get here. She then texted telling me to not answer the door and the police officer was "acting weird." I heard knocks at the door shortly after and thinking it was her didn't answer. It was actually an ambulance. The police officer had sent a firetruck and ambulance here because he thought it odd that I hadn't requested them (he called it all in). Then more knocks came a bit later. I answered and it was the police officer. He checked my sign in log, read the text, listened to the voicemail and then pursued the Mom. My licensor then showed up right after for my yearly surprise inspection that had NOTHING to do with this incident. I began crying because of the stress and she gave me a hug.
I terminated them effective immediately and my licensor said I NEEDED to.

OMG! She sounds crazy! It was a speeding ticket. Pay it and move on.

[Mike]

I sure hope I don't end up having stories like some of these.

I'm mostly worried about the possibility of a false charge of sexual abuse by an angry parent. I never was worried about that when I started making my plans, but a few weeks ago my sister brought it up. Like she said, there is always a risk of angry parents, or even kids, making a false charge, and if I'm watching other people's kids and it ever did happen, it could be trouble.

Why she brought that up, we know of 5 men, directly or indirectly, who have been charged in the last 20 years. 2 we know were innocent and just had an angry step-daughter. 1 we know was guilty and is in prison now. The other 2, only him, the accuser, and God know the truth. All 5 of their lives were ruined, even the 2 innocent ones, so now I'm starting to wonder if male daycare is a high risk, or if I just have to have cameras keeping a record of everything just in case.

DaveA and any other guys here, have you ever thought about the risks of false charges? Do you do anything to prevent or protect from that possible problem? Even the ladies here could be falsely charged, so do you ever think about that, or do anything about that possibility?

I'm thinking maybe it would be safer to be a manny instead. That way it's only 1 family, so much less risky.

[DaveA]

I sure hope I don't end up having stories like some of these.

I'm mostly worried about the possibility of a false charge of sexual abuse by an angry parent. I never was worried about that when I started making my plans, but a few weeks ago my sister brought it up. Like she said, there is always a risk of angry parents, or even kids, making a false charge, and if I'm watching other people's kids and it ever did happen, it could be trouble.

Why she brought that up, we know of 5 men, directly or indirectly, who have been charged in the last 20 years. 2 we know were innocent and just had an angry step-daughter. 1 we know was guilty and is in prison now. The other 2, only him, the accuser, and God know the truth. All 5 of their lives were ruined, even the 2 innocent ones, so now I'm starting to wonder if male daycare is a high risk, or if I just have to have cameras keeping a record of everything just in case.

DaveA and any other guys here, have you ever thought about the risks of false charges? Do you do anything to prevent or protect from that possible problem? Even the ladies here could be falsely charged, so do you ever think about that, or do anything about that possibility?

I'm thinking maybe it would be safer to be a manny instead. That way it's only 1 family, so much less risky.

Short answer- yes I've thought about it. Longer answer- I don't think I could have made in this business 2 decades if it worried me. If it happens I know my career is probably screwed, but I can't live my life based on the possibility of someone else might lie. By that line of logic I wouldn't have gotten married because if things went south she might say I abused her. As for "special precautions" not really other when I was in centers the standard policies for all staff. I had problems centers not letting me work with infants and individual parents not letting their kids be in my classroom/ staff not wanting me there, but it was the minority. I say set your own guidelines to your comfort level and go with it.

[Blackcat31]

Short answer- yes I've thought about it. Longer answer- I don't think I could have made in this business 2 decades if it worried me. If it happens I know my career is probably screwed, but I can't live my life based on the possibility of someone else might lie. By that line of logic I wouldn't have gotten married because if things went south she might say I abused her. As for "special precautions" not really other when I was in centers the standard policies for all staff. I had problems centers not letting me work with infants and individual parents not letting their kids be in my classroom/ staff not wanting me there, but it was the minority. I say set your own guidelines to your comfort level and go with it.

This is great advice from a male provider!!

My DH feels the same....he said he can't control others and how they perceive things but he can be cautious and do whatever it takes to avoid situations where someone might make something out of nothing but even if he does that every day without fail, it doesn't mean he is guaranteed to never be accused of anything (we all know how some parents can be...) Instead of living in fear of "what if..." we all need to make sure we are PRO-active verses reactive.