Child on the Spectrum?

[Logged out for privacy]

I have a dcb, 3 this past May. He's made long strides in my care, but I dealt with hitting for a loooong year. He still doesn't always play well with others.

He can play with himself for very long periods of time, often I think he prefers it. Always cars & trucks or blocks. Sits in the same place, does the same play.

He gets frustrated so easily and has a repetitive behavior that I can't stand. He lays on the floor and rubs his private parts back and forth, not using his hands, just friction from holding hinself up on his arms. He can do this for 15 minutes. Way longer during naptime.

He's not particularly attached to me, or the kids here, but does seem happy around mom and dad, but not the normal smile/laugh happy.

He is pretty smart, but doesn't involve himself in activities here unless I force him.

Parents see him as perfect, so....my question is, what do you think could be going on, since I have him for 1 more year and want to help him as much as possible?

[Thriftylady]

I think it sounds like he needs an evaluation. But you can't force the parents to do it. The only way you can try to force their hand is to tell them you will have to term if they don't. Even then they may just decide to find a new provider. But it sounds like someone needs to advocate for this child. I have one I have begged the parents to get an eval on, but have had him since January and he starts Kindy next month. I am hoping the school will do it, since the parents wont. But his behaviors are not as severe as you are mentioning.

[lovemydaycare0912]

I have dcb 2.5 like that
I truly believe he is autistic but mom doesn't even listen to doctors when they say he's behind. She has an appointment coming up so maybe something will happen then. I feel like only 2 options are term or keep them as we can't force an evaluation on them.

[Unregistered]

I have dcb 2.5 like that
I truly believe he is autistic but mom doesn't even listen to doctors when they say he's behind. She has an appointment coming up so maybe something will happen then. I feel like only 2 options are term or keep them as we can't force an evaluation on them.

Problem with my dcb is that he isn't behind. Just doesn't have normal behaviors. He is an only sibling, and no close family nearby. I don't think the parents make a huge effort to have friends for him outside of daycare, so they only see his action one-on-one with them. He can be very sweet one on one.

He is 3, though, and can tell me all about Harry Potter and Star Wars. Yes, his parents lets him watch them. My other 3's wouldn't be able to comprehend things like that. They would lose interest in 2 minutes, and be very scared of those movies.

[Unregistered]

Hahahaha, I wrote "only sibling". Hahahaha, only child. *Smacks self on head*

[Unregistered]

I think it sounds like he needs an evaluation. But you can't force the parents to do it. The only way you can try to force their hand is to tell them you will have to term if they don't. Even then they may just decide to find a new provider. But it sounds like someone needs to advocate for this child. I have one I have begged the parents to get an eval on, but have had him since January and he starts Kindy next month. I am hoping the school will do it, since the parents wont. But his behaviors are not as severe as you are mentioning.

Eval is definitely not happening here. I want to get him prepped for kindy as much as possible, and then hope they ask for an eval.

[daycarediva]

I agree with a pp, keep or term.

I would bring up at conferences (if you have them) your social concerns and suggest they enroll him in a class outside of school to make 'non school friends' eg= library story time, playgroup, swimming class, etc.

As far as the genital rubbing I would stop that. "Not at daycare." and move him so he can't do it, every.single.time.

I have a little guy I feel is on the spectrum as well, but since he also has incredible verbal ability (no social skills whatsoever, similar situation with parents). I just mention what I see. He speaks in the first person, has some obvious SPD/SID, lack of eye contact, patterned/repeated behavior, he even has delayed echoalia.

[adnilwis]

He's not particularly attached to me, or the kids here, but does seem happy around mom and dad, but not the normal smile/laugh happy.

He is pretty smart, but doesn't involve himself in activities here unless I force him.

Parents see him as perfect, so....my question is, what do you think could be going on, since I have him for 1 more year and want to help him as much as possible?

I have a dck almost identical, except she will be 2 the end of this month. I know it's still a bit young to consider on the spectrum but she's the same way. Very smart but doesn't involve herself unless I give her the ok or physically move her where everyone is. Not attached to me (she's been with me almost 2 years) and does seem happy around her parents but like you said not the usual happy excitement. I very rarely get a smile out of her even when I'm purposely being silly and everyone else is laughing. :she has a very robotic like quality to her voice too.

Her parents say she is totally different at home. Not sure what ever came about with your dck. Mine is going to a center starting 9/6/16 so I'm just trying to wait it out but curious how much you have said to mom and dad about his behaviors? And how often? I just don't know if I should continue to point to out observations or just stop pointing them out since she's leaving my daycare.

[Unregistered]

I have a dck almost identical, except she will be 2 the end of this month. I know it's still a bit young to consider on the spectrum but she's the same way. Very smart but doesn't involve herself unless I give her the ok or physically move her where everyone is. Not attached to me (she's been with me almost 2 years) and does seem happy around her parents but like you said not the usual happy excitement. I very rarely get a smile out of her even when I'm purposely being silly and everyone else is laughing. :she has a very robotic like quality to her voice too.

Her parents say she is totally different at home. Not sure what ever came about with your dck. Mine is going to a center starting 9/6/16 so I'm just trying to wait it out but curious how much you have said to mom and dad about his behaviors? And how often? I just don't know if I should continue to point to out observations or just stop pointing them out since she's leaving my daycare.

OP here. This post was just from a few weeks ago. There is no way dcm or dcd will accept dcb being on the spectrum. I just do the best I can with him. Our school system is really good at bringing behaviors to the attention of parents, so for now, I'm just trying to prepare him for school. He may be that kid who smacks another kid in the face when they call him a butthead, or the teacher tells him to stop playing blocks. So we work on handling emotions a lot.

[Ariana]

I just termed a child on the spectrum. Mom was in denial and I just couldn't deal with some of his behaviors anymore, not to mention he wouldn't play with my daughter. He would do the same things, sit by himself mostly and verbally repeat things over and over 50-100 times a day. If he had gotten evaluated I likely would have kept him but the denial was way worse than the bahavior. It is never good to be in a business relationship with someone who is not able to trust you IMO. The only thing you can do is mention it, recommend an evaluation and then see what happens.