How Do You Remain Calm in Chaos?

[Pestle]

I'm stone cold. Stay centered, make sure nobody's stepping on the baby, deal with poop first and hungry bellies next, and it's all going to be okay.

Years of retail, and customer service, and working in an office at a desk that abutted a screaming-cussing-threatening manager, taught me to distance myself emotionally and keep focused on my job when there's panic in the streets. Is this person freaking out AT ME? No. This person is freaking out at a situation they lack the skills to cope with. And what's my job? To make things work.

Unpack that: What's "Making things work" when it applies to toddlers? Well, it's NOT forcing them to behave the way I prefer them to behave, and it's NOT coaxing them to complete the tasks/lessons I have for them. "Making things work" is to spend this day nurturing these kids into healthy and decent human beings. It's not going to always feel like progress in the moment.

The day will be bad and I will fail if I engage in an emotional battle with a toddler, or get hung up on steering everything that happens. The day will be good if I keep my cool, because the boundaries and security I provide will be reinforced to the kids.

The trick is keeping that mindset at the very moment it's needed. That's where the customer service experience comes in; I'm Pavlovian conditioned to chill wayyyyy out as soon as somebody else starts screaming.

[Nurse Jackie]

I have a two and under crown and sometimes they have melt downs for no apparent reason at all. When my stress levels feel like they are getting high for some reason whistling calms me

[Unregistered]

While I have lots of fun learning centers for play and am a fun loving, let's have a good time provider I nip crazy play in the bud. It doesn't even start. They know I don't tolerate it. They know what will happen if it starts and they know I'm right on it each and every time. Crazy, wild play is for outside and outside only.

Now maybe I've just been lucky. Some of the kids described on some threads would test my nerves for sure! I'm not sure if my no room for wild and hurtful play and actions is because I have consistent rules and routines and lots of play stations/centers to explore or if I have just been lucky!

I understand not every has or wants a dedicated preschool only space. I just find it works really well for me. It's a NEED for me. I Can't do this in my living room!

Now the every day wacky kid stuff (all kids do it!) that has to be dealt with, long hours, isolation, etc. now that gets to me! I just find I have to take care of me. I go before kids arrive and get a cappuccino and sit by the River (I live in a beautiful natural area), I eat well, exercise, hang with friends, have an assistant come in so I can go to lunch with a friend regularly, use essential oils for calming, take baths, turn on my twinkly lights, play soft music during the day, make sure I get an hour break at naptime-no housework, don't take kids under one, etc.