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She even said this morning (because he was whiny), "he didn't want to come because he knows we're (she and dcb) going to the park." Then she kind of laughed. He was clinging to her leg and whining until she pried him off and left with older brother.
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I've had a couple of families over the years who did this same thing. The latest one went on vacation to a very famous theme park and left their younger child home, even though they were at an age where they would have enjoyed it so much :confused:.
I try not to judge, but I'm not very good at not judging apparently :
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Lol. Me either. I've learned to get passed her bringing him all the time when she's off, but this just takes the cake. He KNOWS they're doing fun stuff and that he's left out. Last summer, he didn't realize it but now he's old enough to understand.Comment
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I think the easiest and simplest solution to something you (general you) don't like or agree with is to refuse to be part of it.
If you feel so strongly about what is happening, why participate? Why not refuse care when you know mom isn't working?
If you are allowing it just so the child can have routine or a safe place to be where you feel he is wanted etc, then I don't understand what the issue is....seems mom feels the same.
If you are allowing it because you need the income then I don't think it warrants venting/complaining about it.
You made the choice to accept the dollar and be a participant.
I know many don't feel it's that black and white but to me it really is....if something bothers me that deeply, I would refuse to be a player in the game. Saves my head from spinning, my heart from worrying and leaves my conscious clear.
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I'm not quick on my feet with responses. When I'm surprised by something a parent says/is doing then I just stare with REALLY big eyes.
Like that with my mouth closed. ::
I would have been shocked in that moment and would have stared. But yes, please do say some common sense thing like that when given a moment now that you're able to fully process her level of crazy.
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It's not really something i'm "allowing". Not my child, not my decision to leave him out. I wouldn't refuse care while mom is off because she pays for a full time spot. It's her prerogative to do with that time as she wishes. And I wouldn't let them go over this, it's just something that I would never do to my own child. It makes me sad for him.I think the easiest and simplest solution to something you (general you) don't like or agree with is to refuse to be part of it.
If you feel so strongly about what is happening, why participate? Why not refuse care when you know mom isn't working?
If you are allowing it just so the child can have routine or a safe place to be where you feel he is wanted etc, then I don't understand what the issue is....seems mom feels the same.
If you are allowing it because you need the income then I don't think it warrants venting/complaining about it.
You made the choice to accept the dollar and be a participant.
I know many don't feel it's that black and white but to me it really is....if something bothers me that deeply, I would refuse to be a player in the game. Saves my head from spinning, my heart from worrying and leaves my conscious clear.
And don't we all come here sometimes to "vent and complain" about the things we put up with for the sake of money or because we love the kids? That's all i was doing, like most everyone else here does on occasion.
I didn't choose to participate in her decision to leave her son out. And I never would. She's a client, we have a business relationship, it's technically none of my business. But that doesn't mean i'm blind to his feelings and can ignore them, unlike his mother. I still feel for him when she's leaving with the older brother and little brother's feelings are hurt. That's the main point of my whole post. It's just a sad thing to me. :'(Comment
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Me either. I usually think of a fantastic response about 5 minutes too late! LolI'm not quick on my feet with responses. When I'm surprised by something a parent says/is doing then I just stare with REALLY big eyes. Like that with my mouth closed. ::
I would have been shocked in that moment and would have stared. But yes, please do say some common sense thing like that when given a moment now that you're able to fully process her level of crazy.Comment
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I had a mom several years ago who would take a Friday off every few weeks during the summer. The first time, she said she and her older son were going to hang out, go to the pool, etc. The next time, I thought it would be the younger boy's turn. Nope. Older brother again, and every time. It made me sad for little brother, too.
I was the youngest kid in my family....how sad I would've been if my mom had done that.Comment
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You said a mouthful there. Plus not only will they not get those years back, but what happens if that younger child grows up remembering the hurt these times caused him, that mom definitely appeared to love big brother best, etc. It's plainly showing him he's not as good as big brother if mom can't bring him to those fun paces too. Maybe he feels like a bad kid causing this treatment. You just never know what can go through a 3 yo's mind and what he'll grow up telling himself. I'm not saying any of this is true but it doesn't need to be for him to believe it.
Actions speak louder than words.
Children absolutely treasure one on one time with their mom and/or dad. It tells them they're important enough for the parent to want to be with. What does the opposite show a young child. Shame on dcm. Yes, I'll judge them. 
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Last year, I didn't judge so much. He was 2 then and couldn't do some things that DCM was doing with big brother. I thought it would be different this summer, but no. It's obvious now that she prefers big brother and/or is just lazy and doesn't want to take DCB because he's younger and would be more work for her. So I judge away now.Comment
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