Kids with No Shoes... Advice??

[KTsKids]

I'm new on here, I apologize if this has been addressed already. I've got a DCB, just turned 3, who typically gets here between 5am and 6am and arrives in pj's and slippers or pj's with feet. Mom has been consistently forgetting to pack a pair of sneakers with his clothes for the day.... CLEARLY this becomes an issue when it's time for outdoor play. I've tried explaining to her that it not only prevents him from going out, but all the children because I can't supervise him inside while supervising them outside. A few months back I gave up and purchased a cheap pair of sneakers for DCB to wear while here.

DCB is starting to outgrow the pair I bought him so I once again started asking mom to bring sneakers, which she has not done more than two or three times in the last two weeks. I could take the high road and drop 10 bucks on a bigger pair, however I feel like I'm setting a bad precedence (I have literally no backbone). I know it sounds like a relatively insignificant issue, but for some reason it's really been bugging me. What would you do... but more shoes for DCB? Would it be to extreme to refuse to take him when she shows up with no sneakers?

[Thriftylady]

I still have a weak backbone, but can tell you if you are going to survive in this business, you have to start growing one! If you don't put a stop to this, it will not only continue but probably grow worse with other things. Not meant to be harsh at all.

In the morning at drop off ask "does he have shoes in his bag today?". When she says "oh I forgot" say "well you are going to have to take him with you to get a pair". You will only have to do this once. But be sure you do it.

[Unregistered]

Buy a pair. Charge her 5 dollars a day for shoe rental. Continue to charge her for shoe rental everytime she forgets. Have her sign off on the rental form too.

[MunchkinWrangler]

I like the rental idea! But I agree with Thrifty. I am horrible with backbone too. I get caught off guard and my mind goes blank. I would do exactly what she said to do. She is the parent, not you.

It was a very nice gesture to buy him shoes. Unfortunately, without mom knowing this and without you saying this is an issue, mom has come to expect that you will just take care of it. Make it unacceptable and remind her that it is a basic responsibility of having a child. Also, I know you didn't really mention the pj thing but I would request he show up ready for the day. If it's not a big deal to you, no problem but that would bother me also.

[Ariana]

When she brings the shoes, keep them at your house. Put him back in his pjs at the end of the day and hand him back to her. Start looking for a replacement child.

[NillaWafers]

I'd be calling for pickup if he couldn't participate. Pickup or bring his gosh darn shoes! I like the rent idea, money is a universal language.

[childcaremom]

My policy is that a child who isn't prepared for the day does not stay. I would turn away at the door. Alternatively, if I don't realize that they are missing something until outdoor time, I call for pick up and they have one hour to come and get their child.

You should only have to do this once for dcm to 'get it'. (although I did it about 5 times with a former dcf ) I would send home a note tonight that this is the plan. I would verbally tell mom to read the note in the bag concerning outdoor wear. Strap on that backbone for tomorrow morning. It gets easier the more you use it! lovethis

All of my dcfs currently leave items here for their kids. It saves them from forgetting items.

[JackandJill]

I had a similiar situation this winter with snow boots. It only took turning mom away at the door once to stop the "forgetfulness"!

I asked her before she even got down the stairs if she remembered the boots, she said no. I said (with a nice big smile) that she would have to take dcb back and get his boots before they could come play.

You can do it!

[Unregistered]

Especially since she can't take the time to make sure her child has what he needs for the day, I'd be telling her starting immediately dcb needs to come dressed and ready for the day. It is a nice gesture to buy the shoes but what if someone consistently forgets something else? Shirt, pants, socks, diapers, etc...these things can get out of hand quickly

[lovemydaycare0912]

I would turn away at the door. No shoes, no stay. Its a hazard. If licensing came, they would try to cite for it. Tell her to bring a pair to leave with you, or bring some everyday. A parent of mine gave me some I could keep here.

[Mike]

Tell her he can't be dropped off without shoes, but let her know that ahead of time. That way if she shows tomorrow without shoes, you can say, "sorry, you have to get shoes first", and she can't say she wasn't warned.

[Cat Herder]

I keep a supply of shoes here because it is a regulation that every child have shoes. It prevents a parents lapse from costing me $ and a citation on my record. I excised the parents ability to mess with my day at all. They can literally bring me a naked, dirty, hungry kid every day and it would change nothing in my day other than a quick phone call to DHS . Sad, really. Not sure how that speaks to my level of trust, but there you go. ::

Now, I would have no problem turning them away at the door to go get some shoes. Like unregistered stated; make them come dressed for the day. You gave them a chance, they blew it. Simple.

[VWMom]

You could be a real hard ass and insist she take her son with her to buy shoes at 5 am some morning, but is that the bridge you want to die on? Sometimes parents forget. Sometimes shoes at 5 am is the last thing on their mind. Sometimes parents are just unconcerned. Whatever the reason...to me the fight isn't worth it. I have a couple pair of kids flip flops. They are .97 at Walmart. Problem solved for under $2

[Thriftylady]

You could be a real hard ass and insist she take her son with her to buy shoes at 5 am some morning, but is that the bridge you want to die on? Sometimes parents forget. Sometimes shoes at 5 am is the last thing on their mind. Sometimes parents are just unconcerned. Whatever the reason...to me the fight isn't worth it. I have a couple pair of kids flip flops. They are .97 at Walmart. Problem solved for under $2

I wouldn't do this because I don't allow flip flops in daycare, they are a huge liability. And this isn't a situation where the parent has forgotten once, this is happening day after day. The parent is not following policy of the OP. As providers we have policies in place for a reason.

[VWMom]

liability? Flip flops in a grassy yard? Jeez! I've been in business for 27 years. Never had a child even require stitches on my watch-so they must not be too freaking dangerous. Also, OP never stated anything about a policy including the child's expected dress for the day.