Normal Toddler Behavior?

[Josiegirl]

I didn't read everything but can you do an ages and stages assessment, for your own information then pass on what you learn from it, to the parents? Each child is so different sometimes it's difficult to see the variation as an upcoming problem or if they're just a little bit more of a late comer, KWIM?
There could be lots of other reasons for the affection issues even though they've been with you for awhile.

[adnilwis]

I didn't read everything but can you do an ages and stages assessment, for your own information then pass on what you learn from it, to the parents? Each child is so different sometimes it's difficult to see the variation as an upcoming problem or if they're just a little bit more of a late comer, KWIM?
There could be lots of other reasons for the affection issues even though they've been with you for awhile.

Yes I could try that. Also did an MCHAT for both too, and came back high risk for them. I'll see if I can find an ASQ online to print out for them.

[Ariana]

Yes I could try that. Also did an MCHAT for both too, and came back high risk for them. I'll see if I can find an ASQ online to print out for them.

I did an MCHAT for my DCK and got an 8 which is very high risk. The parents did it and got 2-3 so low risk. There was a huge discrepency between what the parents were seeing and what I was seeing.

For example this child hated swings. I would put him in a swing and he would freak out and look completely terrified. I had never seen a kid act like that. When I told the mom she looked at me like I had 10 heads but didn't day anything which lead me to believe she had never put him in a swing before but didn't want to say that. The child was exposed to very little at home and everything was done for him. When he started with me at 18 months he had never held a marker or a balloon before. He could barely drink out of a sippy cup and would over stuff his mouth all the time. The mom, who was very educated in early childhood education, thought this was completely normal :confused:

Is it possible they just aren't being stimulated at home? Eventhough my DCK slept 12 hours at night he would sleep here for up to 5 hours some days! Again, at home he rarely slept more than 2 hours. I just never knew what to believe to be honest. How could a child be soooo different with me??

[adnilwis]

I did an MCHAT for my DCK and got an 8 which is very high risk. The parents did it and got 2-3 so low risk. There was a huge discrepency between what the parents were seeing and what I was seeing.

For example this child hated swings. I would put him in a swing and he would freak out and look completely terrified. I had never seen a kid act like that. When I told the mom she looked at me like I had 10 heads but didn't day anything which lead me to believe she had never put him in a swing before but didn't want to say that. The child was exposed to very little at home and everything was done for him. When he started with me at 18 months he had never held a marker or a balloon before. He could barely drink out of a sippy cup and would over stuff his mouth all the time. The mom, who was very educated in early childhood education, thought this was completely normal :confused:

Is it possible they just aren't being stimulated at home? Eventhough my DCK slept 12 hours at night he would sleep here for up to 5 hours some days! Again, at home he rarely slept more than 2 hours. I just never knew what to believe to be honest. How could a child be soooo different with me??

It is very possible yes. The MCHAT I did was a 10 for each of them, but no clue if parents did it and know score. They most likely get a lot done for them at home being only children but since they have been with me since 3 months I've been with them a long time.

[Ariana]

It is very possible yes. The MCHAT I did was a 10 for each of them, but no clue if parents did it and know score. They most likely get a lot done for them at home being only children but since they have been with me since 3 months I've been with them a long time.

Well this might not be the case for you. In my case the child was only with me two days a week and spent the rest of the time with mom or dad. I am thinking something is going on here if you got a 10 on the MChat. I would bring it up with the parents and forward them a copy of the Mchat to complete and then highly recommend they see a pediatrician for further exploration. I ignored it with my DCK for about a year because I was so confused about why he was so different with me and why mom wasn't seeing anything.

[adnilwis]

Yes I could try that. Also did an MCHAT for both too, and came back high risk for them. I'll see if I can find an ASQ online to print out for them.

I did an ASQ for those two and my daughter who is the same age. They were right at cutoff for almost all areas except a few. My daughter was just where she should be, but again, for mom and dad they could act different. The boy scored really low in problem solving and personal/social. The girl was low in communication and a few others. I don't have it to look at right now to know for sure.

[adnilwis]

I'm the original poster and just to update. The DCBI wrote about is no longer in my care. He goes to a center and according to mom had no issues with the change and is doing well. He enjoys being with kids his own age.
The Dcg is still with me. She will be 2 on August 26. Her last day with me is September 2. They are moving her to a center so she'll be with all 2 year olds. She still doesn't play much. She only will if I or someone else gets out something. She has access to whatever she wants and would rather rock the rocking chair back and forth or run around in circles . Her playtime doesn't last long. She either puts the toy in her mouth or gets up and just watches everyone play, She doesn't attract my attention by taking my hand or coming up to me with a toy nor does she sit on my lap EVER. Rarely responds to her name (and when she does the eye contact is very short and minimal). I've noticed it with Dad when he picks up and drops off. He'll say her name at least 3 times before he leaves in the morning to get her to say bye and she won't look at him. At night he comes and picks her up and will talk to her and ask how her day was. She never looks at him. Mom has told me she gives eye contact at home.

But now that she's leaving I feel like I shouldn't bring up anything else to mom and dad. Any thoughts on the behavior or advice? She's been in my care since she was 6 weeks old.