Difficult Daycare Provider

[Blackcat31]

My first reaction was to contact police. This is hard, because I've trusted her care for the past 1.5 years with my kids. And her husband is a cop. So I've been proceeding with caution. I didn't realize asking for a signed contract would unfold into a crazy mess (which I still have not received!) I need to figure out how to get her license. She gave me a business card when the kids just started, but I can't find it! I've been searching all over the internet, which led me to this website, but to no avail.

To give you an idea of

Here are her exact words, "My daughter is sitting with me watching powerful drugs run through me as she cries day and night wondering if I will live or die and all you give a crap about is a damn signed contract you know you signed a year and a half ago. Are you that heartless?? You need help... you seriously need help. Think about who are you as a human!! My daughter is crying as she is laying in bed with me and you care about yourself. Sick."

I can't even make up stuff like this! She's seriously insane. And having her husband as a cop does not make this situation any easier for me. All the while, I KNEW she was not at the hospital because the other mom was giving me updates on her! (Making spaghetti for the kids, going to softball with her daughter?!) Pretty good for someone who was doing 5 days of chemo? A horrible reason to avoid giving me a signed contract!

It took me awhile to respond, because I have no experience with dealing with a person like this. My response was simply "Please send over the signed contract and we will be happy to pay the rest"

She is NOT fit to run a childcare. It's weird cause literally not even a month ago I was raving about what a great daycare my kids go to... and now suddenly I'm fearing for any child that still goes there... and that gut wrenching thoughts of what did she do, what did she give them, when I was completely unaware of her bizarre behavior/personality... =/

You need to stop responding to her. Period.

Report this entire situation to licensing. If you need help finding out who and where to contact, send me a PM with your exact location (what town you live in) and I will find the contact info for you.

You need to keep any documentation you have from her and report this. Do NOT continue discussing this with her. It's pointless.

Whether her DH is law enforcement or not has nothing to do with the fact that something very odd is going on here.

For future reference ANY time you sign paperwork for enrollment in child care you are entitled to make and KEEP a copy for your own records. Do not sign without keeping a copy for yourself.

Save all documentation you have (texts, e-mails etc) from her and report this entire situation the the proper authorities. They will assist you in figuring out the next legal and logical steps.

[mka_mommy]

In the future, I would look for a provider who has the things i mentioned in place such as the sign in/sigh out sheet, etc. That is for the provider, but it helps protect you also.

Yes, I will. She seemingly had a very nice and bubbly personality. Up until recently. In hind-sight, and now with talking to another mom whose child is in her care, we are connecting dots and I am suspecting she gives the children allergy medicine to make them drowsy. I told the other mom to not give the daycare provider ANY IDEA that we still keep in contact, to keep her babies safe. It's hard not to feel that way with thinking back how she would give my kids allergy medicine. I was so naive! but thankful to God my children are OUT OF THERE.

[Blackcat31]

http://www.ccld.ca.gov/PG408.htm

[Rockgirl]

Why is the other mom leaving her child there, when she suspects the children are being medicated?

[mka_mommy]

I agree!! Something is totally off with this entire situation. Definitely call licensing. And if needed, go right up the list to get satisfaction. Get all the documentation you have kept so far plus everything else she sends you. Is this woman licensed with the state, do you know if there are online complaints about her, maybe you could talk further with the other dcm you seem to have a bond with(discuss actions such as bathing, meds., etc.), does she seem to have tons of kids(over ratios), it doesn't add up. If you can afford to get a lawyer maybe go that route? If not, then check around and see if there is some kind of agency that can help you with the legalities of this.
I also don't understand....did dcp try to get OTC meds or prescription meds? IF she did bring your dd to the drs. why would she need to know which pharmacy you used to get OTC?

The prescription was for amox. I have proof of the days I've already brought my child to the doctor, 2/25 I brought my 17 mo suspecting an ear infection, but the doctor confirmed it was likely digestive problems. (I was concerned because she had been fussy, and very cranky lately, mommy & daddy weren’t getting any sleep either) No fever, no cough. 3/02 is when DCP brought her to her “friend” doctor, and prescribed her amoxicillin. (literally 5 days after I had brought her to her own pediatrician) I found it odd when she was asking which pharmacy I go to, I asked her why. She told me she brought my daughter to the doctor, and need to pick up prescription (Like it was no big deal!) Red flags blaring, I made an appointment that same day (I love Kaiser) with her pediatrician. She did in fact have an ear infection, I found it odd, but my daughters doctor said some children do get ear infections without a fever, and advised that the DCP should not have brought her to any doctor and that it was considered child assault. The doctor had not medical history on the child, and that I being the parent had no idea she was brought there. The level of trust was completely broken. AND DCP now had her own supply of amox. How she did that, I still have no idea ~ just scary that she’s able to get prescription drugs that way!

[mka_mommy]

Why is the other mom leaving her child there, when she suspects the children are being medicated?

She's currently looking. This has happened over the course of 3 days (3/22 - 3/24). It took me a week to figure out a new daycare situation for my kids. (she took my daughter to the dr. w/ out my consent 3/02, had to silently stay nice without her suspecting I was trying to get my kids out the week of 3/07 - 3/11 - and terminated her as a DCP 3/13) She asked me for 2 weeks notice pay. I cooperated and gave her 1 week pay 3/14 in good faith she would provide the signed contract. 3/22 she contacted for the last week of pay, and it all unraveled between 3/22 - 3/24. All I asked for was a signed copy of the contract for my records, which I still haven't received. I was ready to pay the week just to get her off my back, but I was advised that I am entitled for a copy of the contract, and if I she does not provide, than I am not responsible for paying it if it was not in her contract I signed upon enrollment. When I told her that I don't remember reading that on her terms and if she can provide a copy, she got defensive and said it wasn't me who signed, it was my husband. Where i then politely asked for a copy. I still haven't received it. Keep in mind, I did already pay the first week, without even seeing her contract believing I would have gotten it by now.

[Rockgirl]

She's currently looking. This has happened over the course of 3 days (3/22 - 3/24). It took me a week to figure out a new daycare situation for my kids. (she took my daughter to the dr. w/ out my consent 3/02, had to silently stay nice without her suspecting I was trying to get my kids out the week of 3/07 - 3/11 - and terminated her as a DCP 3/13) She asked me for 2 weeks notice pay. I cooperated and gave her 1 week pay 3/14 in good faith she would provide the signed contract. 3/22 she contacted for the last week of pay, and it all unraveled between 3/22 - 3/24. All I asked for was a signed copy of the contract for my records, which I still haven't received. I was ready to pay the week just to get her off my back, but I was advised that I am entitled for a copy of the contract, and if I she does not provide, than I am not responsible for paying it if it was not in her contract I signed upon enrollment. When I told her that I don't remember reading that on her terms and if she can provide a copy, she got defensive and said it wasn't me who signed, it was my husband. Where i then politely asked for a copy. I still haven't received it. Keep in mind, I did already pay the first week, without even seeing her contract believing I would have gotten it by now.

I totally get all the contract part--it's not valid unless both parties received a copy.

But if I suspected my child was being medicated, I would pull immediately. Children have died in care when medicated to make them sleep. No way would I take that risk with my child just to avoid upsetting the provider!

[mka_mommy]

Thank you Blackcat31

[mka_mommy]

I totally get all the contract part--it's not valid unless both parties received a copy.

But if I suspected my child was being medicated, I would pull immediately. Children have died in care when medicated to make them sleep. No way would I take that risk with my child just to avoid upsetting the provider!

Exactly... knowing what I know now, I would have done it the instant i had a bad feeling. If you ever met the DCP you literally would never in your wildest imagination think she would be doing anything to harm your child. I trusted her for 1.5 years whole heartedly. And it was when the other DCM reached out to me in FB and asked why I took my children out is when I began to realize the true harm in this all. I really believe I was put in this position to now protect any child under her care. I was so naive, but now with all this research I've done in the past 48 hours is mind blowing. It's a scary thought that my children could have been a victim of hers. I'm doing everything I can, get the right resources. I'm reaching out to family attorneys, i'm reaching out to friend attorneys, I've just submitted an inquiry at my local attorney office, i'm reaching out here on a forum, friends family. Every outlet I can get to, to take the calculated steps that will protect a child. Believe me, in hindsight there are so many things I would have done differently. But I'm focusing on today, and right now. Thanking my lucky stars my children are safe, and now ensuring the safety of other children is my goal. And taking it as a true lesson learned.

[Josiegirl]

She should be investigated pronto. Either by state licensing or police with a warrant. I don't know the procedure to go through for them to obtain a warrant but something needs to happen soon, to stop her.

[sharlan]

In CA, we cannot give children prescription medication without a SIGNED LIC 9221.

You need to contact licensing ASAP.

[mka_mommy]

In CA, we cannot give children prescription medication without a SIGNED LIC 9221.

You need to contact licensing ASAP.

Thank you for this. I was unaware of this form, and googled it. I will tell you right now I never received or signed this form. It was amazing how nonchalant DCP was about getting the prescription. She went on to tell me to let the doctor know she doesn't need to prescribe any amox because she already has some??! When I told the pediatrician she was just as shocked as I was.

[SnowGirl]

Regardless of her status as licensed or illegally run, the licensing office will want to know about this.

Contact them with her address and name, they'll take it from there (I'm in CO, not CA, but they investigate illegal daycares here through licensing. I would think CA would as well).

I'm so glad your child is safe now, please get this woman investigated ASAP. Call licensing!.

[NeedaVaca]

This entire thread is odd to me, you say you looked at all the contracts and didn't see anything about a 2 weeks notice, then you say you need a copy of the contract. A Dr saw your daughter as a patient and prescribed her medicine and you are more worried about the contract? You took a week before pulling your daughter? You now suspect drugging them for naps and another parent is aware of this and still taking her daughter there? She actually got a prescription? I'm sorry but the contract would be the least of my worries, the provider could likely go to jail for this, the Dr that wrote a prescription for your child could also bear legal troubles, lose medical license etc. this whole story is just strange IMO

[NightOwl]

This entire thread is odd to me, you say you looked at all the contracts and didn't see anything about a 2 weeks notice, then you say you need a copy of the contract. A Dr saw your daughter as a patient and prescribed her medicine and you are more worried about the contract? You took a week before pulling your daughter? You now suspect drugging them for naps and another parent is aware of this and still taking her daughter there? She actually got a prescription? I'm sorry but the contract would be the least of my worries, the provider could likely go to jail for this, the Dr that wrote a prescription for your child could also bear legal troubles, lose medical license etc. this whole story is just strange IMO

I agree. This is a really strange thread. I would have had this woman arrested on day ONE of this debacle, not kept my child enrolled with her for another full week, which gave her 7 more days to medicate my child behind my back. No way. No job is worth endangering my kid (assuming the fear of losing her job was the "reason" for keeping her child enrolled).