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I started thinking about this after reading another thread on here. I am in a same sex relationship and have a day care in my home. I always introduce my girlfriend as "my roommate" when people come for interviews because I don't believe it is their business what our relationship is, but of course they will meet her. I have certainly had potential clients act strangely during the interview and sometimes I feel it is because of that. Would you exclude me as a caregiver for your child because of this? Has anyone else ever had a similar issue? My girlfriend always feels bad and says she thinks itsher fault when the interview doesn't work out, I just say I'd rather find out they are uncomfortable now, rather than later if they didn't meet her at the interview.
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nope would not be an issue for me. BUT I would say this.
If someone had a problem with it, then they are not the right fit for you and your program.
You don't have to disclose that information, you don't ask them what they do behind closed doors, and they shouldn't either.
People don't choose me sometimes I am certain because of my culture and it's ok, I don't take it personal. They just weren't for me. I have learned to let it go.
You only want the ones that are the right fit and you can't change people. Even if you could, you wouldn't want to.
Tell your SO not to feel bad. It's not her fault people feel that way and learn to let it roll off your back. who you choose as your partner has zero affect on the care you will provide. -
I think it's a sad sad world we live in that would make you feel like you have to choose careful wording like 'roomate' to protect yourself. To me, it would not matter.Comment
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It wouldn't bother me either. Reassure your partner it mostly likely isn't the case.
Keep in mind that we all get turned down by potential dcfs so it might not be what you're imagining at all. We get no-shows, dcfs that choose other dcs, etc. all the time.Comment
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Absolutely not. I'm a BIG LGBT advocate, even though I am straight. No one should be treated as if they are "less than" just because they were born with different preferences. It disgusts me that we live in the 21st century and this is still an issue. If we were a good fit, I'd bring my kid to you without batting an eye.Comment
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Not that is is the same at all, but I have pink hair and my tongue pierced, I also 15 years experience in child care and am in grad school. I know some people don't choose my dc because of my appearance and that's ok! I love my families because they accept me and I think they all know I am accepting of out of the norm lifestyles. Many of my parents signed on with me when my hair was blue! You are you and at at the end of the day, those who are supposed to will come.Comment
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This was exactly me. ^
I think we are all ruled by our fears. We can't run our lives by the fears others have. I started to "not care" at 40. That's a long time to suffer. Live and let live.Comment
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It wouldn't matter to me. But the one thing that irritates me about my church is the attitudes there over it. Many of those people would have issue with it. That bugs me, because although I wouldn't live that way, it isn't my place to judge anyone else. My church teaches not to judge and forgiveness, but in this one area I feel they judge, you can't have it both ways!:confused: I have had a couple of really good friends at different point in my life that were gay. One of them was a driving force in giving me enough caring and support with a dose of tough love that helped me break away from my abusive ex husband. A part of me will always feel indebted to her, because she knew just when to support me and just when and how to be firm with me. "You have two babies to take care of" she would say! I guess to me, I try to decide if I want to hang out with you or be friends with you based on how you treat people, and if (when) I looked for daycare I was worried about how you treat my child.
I agree with those who say you are better off if those people don't sign up. You don't want a bad match. But those of us who are straight have interviews that don't sign also, so remember there are always other reasons.
Try to encourage your partner not to feel bad. Let her know that these things can and do happen, but at the end of the day your relationship is more important than some better than thou type person.Comment
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I have lots of tattoos. My avatar is a big one on my right shoulder blade. I'm sure I've been passed over for that reason.Comment
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I hope the attachment works!
I read these words all the time. They have really helped me come to terms with the fact that not everyone is going to like me or sign up with me.Attached FilesComment
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I would not have an issue, at all and I'm sorry that it is something that you feel might be. :hug:Comment
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Everyone judges for something. Some people it won't bother, some people it will.
I'm switching over to a Christian daycare, and there is a good probability I will lose one or two families. But I will attract others, too.
Figure out who is most attracted to your services. What are their commonalities? Then advertise to reach those types of people.
When my ds was in daycare (not with me), we chose a male provider. After we had been there a few weeks, he asked me what church I went to, if any. I told him Catholic. He said, "I have all Catholic parents. They are the only ones who trust me and don't question me as a male provider."
Maybe conduct similar research.Comment
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As a dcm I wouldn't have a problem with this at all. At the daycare center my son attended two of the teachers were lesbians and married to each other, no one batted an eye. I actually requested my son be in one of the woman's classrooms (nothing to do with her sexual orientation, but because she was just an awesome teacher and my son loved her when she was a floater in his classroom before she became a lead teacher). His infant teacher at his old daycare had tons of tattoos and that never bothered me either, I'm more interested in how a dcp treats my son and his/her qualifications than how they look.Comment
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