See-Through Dress Strikes Again

[midaycare]

I was surprised at this being such a touchy subject when I saw the first post and that so many people again feel this way. I suppose it's another one of these cultural differences we just have to learn to view from a place of neutrality and not judgement. I live by the beach and we have basically naked (wearing just a diaper, just undies or sometimes nothing) kids at the beach all the time. The beaches have playgrounds so kids'll go play with very little on and parents will drive them to get groceries and such on the way home. So kids often wear little tops and see through skirts and its just normal. Kids also go to school (childcare) in whatever. It doesn't seem logical to not be worried out in the world and then be worried at your 'second home'- family childcare or even center based care. Many feminists today really don't believe in concerning themselves with what a girl or woman is wearing because it is their choice to be comfortable and express themselves. If a sick person looks at the half dressed child in a sick way, can that really be the fault of the clothing (or child or parent for wearing it)? This is what people call victim blaming. I know many will say 'no no this is not what we are talking about'. You think it's what? Unethical, immoral? To wear those see through things? Why? The child's certain areas shouldn't be seen? Why? Because those areas are different from other areas (bottom is different than an arm)? Why? Because that area is viewed as sexual? I think we should examine what is it that makes people uncomfortable to see a child in see through clothing. And where do we draw the line. Should they cover their knees as well? Ankles? Shoulders? Neck? Hair?

Parents have a responsibility to keep their children safe from perverts, rapists, kidnappers, and altogether sick people.

And, in my opinion, there is a difference between a butt/private parts and an arm. A child can't get raped on the arm. Nor can they make babies with one.

[Hunni Bee]

I was surprised at this being such a touchy subject when I saw the first post and that so many people again feel this way. I suppose it's another one of these cultural differences we just have to learn to view from a place of neutrality and not judgement. I live by the beach and we have basically naked (wearing just a diaper, just undies or sometimes nothing) kids at the beach all the time. The beaches have playgrounds so kids'll go play with very little on and parents will drive them to get groceries and such on the way home. So kids often wear little tops and see through skirts and its just normal. Kids also go to school (childcare) in whatever. It doesn't seem logical to not be worried out in the world and then be worried at your 'second home'- family childcare or even center based care. Many feminists today really don't believe in concerning themselves with what a girl or woman is wearing because it is their choice to be comfortable and express themselves. If a sick person looks at the half dressed child in a sick way, can that really be the fault of the clothing (or child or parent for wearing it)? This is what people call victim blaming. I know many will say 'no no this is not what we are talking about'. You think it's what? Unethical, immoral? To wear those see through things? Why? The child's certain areas shouldn't be seen? Why? Because those areas are different from other areas (bottom is different than an arm)? Why? Because that area is viewed as sexual? I think we should examine what is it that makes people uncomfortable to see a child in see through clothing. And where do we draw the line. Should they cover their knees as well? Ankles? Shoulders? Neck? Hair?

It really isn't any of that. And I agree with what your saying.

A woman has the choice of whether she wants to have her underwear seen or what level of modesty she wants to have. This little girl doesn't. I'm am certain if she knew her underwear were showing or if one of her friends mentioned it, she'd be mortified.

Daycare is not an appropriate place to show underwear, or bottoms, or any other private parts. That's for at home or with parents. I'm not set up to be liable for anyone's private areas to be showing. Not to mention it's unsanitary.

[auntymimi]

I think it is more of a cultural shift in what is considered clothing-appropriate. Dd(16yo) and I were talking about a similar issue just this week.

Back in the day(high school) a few decades ago ...it was THE most embarrassing thing to have a bra strap show. Or if one could see the color of your underwear/bra through the white basketball/volleyball uniforms for home games. Like, "OMG I could just die" worthy. Bff had her older brother drive 20 miles out of the way to get a different colored sports bra for her.
Showing a bra strap when wearing a tank/cami is no big deal, and hasn't been for quite some time. Or wearing leggings as pants, or seeing the hint of the undies color under white shorts/pants. I mean, my grandma flipped her lid if I wore a skirt/dress without a slip and nylons (even if not see-through). I ditched wearing slips before high school, nylons shortly after...even though grandma thought it was trashy --or "gross". Haven't owned either of those items in over 20 years.

So I am guessing mom doesn't care or pay attention while dressing her child, because it is a non-issue to her. Just provide an explicit dress code acceptable to you that you can enforce, and dcm can eye-roll all she wants. You cannot rely on common sense for clothing choice, because I see it as an overall shift in what is considered appropriate.

I was born in the early 80's and remembered this line of thinking as well. I still wear a strapless bra with any tank top and a nude slip under any white/cream colored dress as do my daughters. I remember when walking around "with your undergarments out" as my grandma put it, was very bad taste. Also, I think clothing tends to be made more cheaply now than before. Even grown women's clothing, the fabric is a lot of times is very thin.

[auntymimi]

I was surprised at this being such a touchy subject when I saw the first post and that so many people again feel this way. I suppose it's another one of these cultural differences we just have to learn to view from a place of neutrality and not judgement. I live by the beach and we have basically naked (wearing just a diaper, just undies or sometimes nothing) kids at the beach all the time. The beaches have playgrounds so kids'll go play with very little on and parents will drive them to get groceries and such on the way home. So kids often wear little tops and see through skirts and its just normal. Kids also go to school (childcare) in whatever. It doesn't seem logical to not be worried out in the world and then be worried at your 'second home'- family childcare or even center based care. Many feminists today really don't believe in concerning themselves with what a girl or woman is wearing because it is their choice to be comfortable and express themselves. If a sick person looks at the half dressed child in a sick way, can that really be the fault of the clothing (or child or parent for wearing it)? This is what people call victim blaming. I know many will say 'no no this is not what we are talking about'. You think it's what? Unethical, immoral? To wear those see through things? Why? The child's certain areas shouldn't be seen? Why? Because those areas are different from other areas (bottom is different than an arm)? Why? Because that area is viewed as sexual? I think we should examine what is it that makes people uncomfortable to see a child in see through clothing. And where do we draw the line. Should they cover their knees as well? Ankles? Shoulders? Neck? Hair?

I grew up on the beach in Fl, lived there my whole life until 8 years ago. You will occasionally see a baby in just a diaper or a kid in a swimsuit, but not that often. And even still it's looked at as kind of "trashy" that the parents can't bother to at least put a t-shirt on them. Most kids will have cover-ups on, even most babies have clothes on while in public. If for no other reason than, when entering an establishment, usually the air conditioning is blasting and you go from hot as heck to freezing cold in an instant.

[BabyMonkeys]

Feminists today really don't believe in concerning themselves with what a girl or woman is wearing because it is their choice to be comfortable and express themselves. If a sick person looks at the half dressed child in a sick way, can that really be the fault of the clothing (or child or parent for wearing it)? This is what people call victim blaming. I know many will say 'no no this is not what we are talking about'. You think it's what? Unethical, immoral? To wear those see through things? Why? The child's certain areas shouldn't be seen? Why? Because those areas are different from other areas (bottom is different than an arm)? Why? Because that area is viewed as sexual? I think we should examine what is it that makes people uncomfortable to see a child in see through clothing. And where do we draw the line. Should they cover their knees as well? Ankles? Shoulders? Neck? Hair?

Seriously? :confused:

[Unregistered]

Absolutely seriously.

http://www.bustle.com/articles/83035-7-reasons-to-stop-shaming-women-who-wear-revealing-clothing-your-ideas-of-propriety-aside

This title says 'women' but also explains thoughts on younger girls clothing quite well.

[Josiegirl]

I don't think see-through clothes are appropriate for little girls. Period. All the kids will notice and make comments and tease them. That, in itself, makes it harder to keep a group focused and remembering their manners. Lord knows, there's enough a child could get picked on for, why add one more opportunity?
Whenever a dcg wears dresses here, they're always wearing shorts, tights, etc. underneath so they can play like a kid. And the parents themselves have dressed them that way because I've never brought it up.
Whether or not dcm(or anybody else) agrees with the OP and the rules, if dcm has been requested to dress her dd in more appropriate clothing, then why isn't she??
It all comes down to following the rules in the establishment where you want your child to be.

I kind of think this side note is related in some way but to older kids. Our high school has a dress code, boys wear collared shirts and ties, no jeans, girls' skirts can't be shorter than a certain place, tops have to be appropriate, no shirts allowed that have writing(there are few exceptions), things like that. The students focus on tasks at hand, not on the girls' b00bs hanging out. This school is almost like a small college and is wonderful. The kids receive and give respect, the community respects them. Sure, you have a few challenging kids out of 1000 but everybody looks upon this school as prestigious. That's not really the word I wanted but all I can think of and hope you get my meaning.

[Unregistered]

I was surprised at this being such a touchy subject when I saw the first post and that so many people again feel this way. I suppose it's another one of these cultural differences we just have to learn to view from a place of neutrality and not judgement. I live by the beach and we have basically naked (wearing just a diaper, just undies or sometimes nothing) kids at the beach all the time. The beaches have playgrounds so kids'll go play with very little on and parents will drive them to get groceries and such on the way home. So kids often wear little tops and see through skirts and its just normal. Kids also go to school (childcare) in whatever. It doesn't seem logical to not be worried out in the world and then be worried at your 'second home'- family childcare or even center based care. Many feminists today really don't believe in concerning themselves with what a girl or woman is wearing because it is their choice to be comfortable and express themselves. If a sick person looks at the half dressed child in a sick way, can that really be the fault of the clothing (or child or parent for wearing it)? This is what people call victim blaming. I know many will say 'no no this is not what we are talking about'. You think it's what? Unethical, immoral? To wear those see through things? Why? The child's certain areas shouldn't be seen? Why? Because those areas are different from other areas (bottom is different than an arm)? Why? Because that area is viewed as sexual? I think we should examine what is it that makes people uncomfortable to see a child in see through clothing. And where do we draw the line. Should they cover their knees as well? Ankles? Shoulders? Neck? Hair?

Feminist just means the belief of equality between men and women.
Just because you can doesn't mean you should show it all off. There is a law for public indecency for a reason.