Do You Ever....?

[Cat Herder]

( what in the world!?)

If you don't understand that feel blessed. Mocking is a tad dramatic, though.

Look at some of the "Mandated Reporter" and "testifying in court" threads... It can be a rough career sometimes.

[midaycare]

This doesn't bother me. They are paying for the spot and I have a job. Win/Win.

I don't close when I'm sick. If I'm vomiting, my hubby will call in to his work and take over for me, or I take a loss for the day and pay my sub all of my profits for the day. Either situation isn't ideal so I work through illness.

[Unregistered]

Sorry but jumping to the conclusion that if people are using childcare when they don't work is probably just because they didn't plan or want their children is pretty wild. Do we really need to find some sort of statistics to prove that a huge majority using childcare while not working did plan for and do want their children!? It seems pretty obvious to me that the didn't plan/didn't want population is so miniscule that it needn't even be mentioned much less thought of as the main reason nonworking parents use child care.

[Cat Herder]

Sorry but jumping to the conclusion that if people are using childcare when they don't work is probably just because they didn't plan or want their children is pretty wild. Do we really need to find some sort of statistics to prove that a huge majority using childcare while not working did plan for and do want their children!? It seems pretty obvious to me that the didn't plan/didn't want population is so miniscule that it needn't even be mentioned much less thought of as the main reason nonworking parents use child care.

:confused::confused: At no point did I state that. Not sure what you read....

My point was Mountain > Molehill .

Nothing more.

Carry on.

[Unregistered]

Even though my children were thoroughly planned and wanted ( what in the world!?) I use child care when I'm not working. I also take care of tons of other people's kids all the time, working or not. It has never once crossed my mind that the non-workers don't deserve child care. This is really bizarre to me.

It's bizarre that people who have kids and aren't working should be taking care of their own children? Clearly we live in a messed up society.

[kendallina]

I absolutely find this annoying! I grit my teeth when I see a parent in their sweats in the morning and again at a 5pm pick up. I just can't stand it.

I admit it. It is my initial reaction to feel judgey of a parent like this, but I'm smarter than that. I realize that it serves no one for me to feel this way. I also know that I have no idea what's going on in someone's life.

I once had a very good friend who did this all the time and at first it annoyed me, but then when she started talking about how she had really bad postpartum depression with her daughter (who she was with every day until she went back to work at 18 months), I realized that I need to relax and realize that she's just doing what's best for her and her family. That really there is just too much judgement about what others do with their kids, but in reality we're all just trying to survive. By no means am I a perfect parent, I'm just trying to survive without damaging my kids too much and I suspect that's what everyone else is doing too.

[Thriftylady]

I absolutely find this annoying! I grit my teeth when I see a parent in their sweats in the morning and again at a 5pm pick up. I just can't stand it.

I admit it. It is my initial reaction to feel judgey of a parent like this, but I'm smarter than that. I realize that it serves no one for me to feel this way. I also know that I have no idea what's going on in someone's life.

I once had a very good friend who did this all the time and at first it annoyed me, but then when she started talking about how she had really bad postpartum depression with her daughter (who she was with every day until she went back to work at 18 months), I realized that I need to relax and realize that she's just doing what's best for her and her family. That really there is just too much judgement about what others do with their kids, but in reality we're all just trying to survive. By no means am I a perfect parent, I'm just trying to survive without damaging my kids too much and I suspect that's what everyone else is doing too.

THIS! We never really know another person's situation, and a job loss is a stressful event. Maybe this parent is stressed to the point that they know it is better if they are not with their child all the time. Like I said sometimes I still feel like a parent could make my day a little easier, but this is my job. I think almost everyone wishes their job was a little easier or less stressful or whatever sometimes. Funny thing is, we all manage somehow to get through it.

I remember when I found out I was PG with DD 17. At the time, I was trying to dig myself out of my horribly abusive first marriage. I was sick and I think part of me knew I was PG, but I didn't want to believe it and I do have fertility issues so I guess I put my blinders on. I finally went to the doctor and got the news. My first thought was "OH NO, I simply cannot have a baby right now, I can't cope with this and I don't want to". Guess what? That passed fairly quickly and even though I allowed it to keep me in my marriage longer, by the time she was born she was my drive to make my life better. She still is. I went from not knowing how in the world I would deal with her, to her being the reason I kept breathing. Sometimes, we go through stuff and it that stuff is hard and we do/say/think things we never would otherwise. I hope if any of my DCPs are ever in a stressful situation where they just can't deal, they will at least know that for a few hours each day, their child is safe and loved with me.

[MunchkinWrangler]

I think you hit the nail on the head! I should have taken today off. I give myself only 5 sick days paid and I guess I am worried that I will need those days when I am SUPER sick. I usually wait until I have a stomach bug or something serious. I reallynhate navigating these murky waters where the parent is taking advantage.

The mom is also pregnant with baby number two and her child was definitely planned. It is more of a Princess attitude than anything else. I just find parents these days put themselves first and their kids last.

BlackCat she has no issues telling me about all of her days off when she was working or time away at hotels for weekends without her kid etc. I do agree though that she probably doesn't want to appear to be a bad parent which is the primary motivation for most parents these days. Anyway I am getting paid so I should just drop it.

You feel trapped by your job. It's understandable, but never compare anyone else to you. When you do that, then you become obsessed with feeling like you don't have freedom, when in fact you do. Sometimes you wake up feeling ill and don't know how bad you feel until the kids are there. And, you start feeling like you should have closed but now what? Honestly, you do have the power to call the parents and say, hey, I'm really under the weather, you need to pick up and leave it at that. Don't feel guilty, don't feel mad. It's okay. :hug: I think that's where you're resentment is coming from. Hope your feel better soon!

[MunchkinWrangler]

:confused::confused: At no point did I state that. Not sure what you read....

My point was Mountain > Molehill .

Nothing more.

Carry on.

[Cat Herder]

Thank you! That seriously had me worried that I had lost the ability to communicate.

My bet is when Mom lost her job she realized she also lost her social group, too. It happens a lot. Our co-workers become our friends. It is a type of mourning nobody seems to recognize.

Maybe she just needed to listen to REM, eat a bag of cheetos and cry for a bit. I know I did when I left my former career. I still miss it.

Empathy. Perspective.

[Rockgirl]

Nope.

As long as they pay me on time, their contract is in full effect.

Same here! If I can reach a parent in case of emergency, I don't give the slightest thought to what they are doing during the day. My job remains the same: to care for their child.

[Unregistered]

Thank you! That seriously had me worried that I had lost the ability to communicate.

My bet is when Mom lost her job she realized she also lost her social group, too. It happens a lot. Our co-workers become our friends. It is a type of mourning nobody seems to recognize.

Maybe she just needed to listen to REM, eat a bag of cheetos and cry for a bit. I know I did when I left my former career. I still miss it.

Empathy. Perspective.

This was actually not a permanent job but a placement/contract so she knew it was going to end but just never told me upfront....or ever.

I think you all give people too much benefit of the doubt. My guess is when the money runs out she'll be taken from my care and given to grandma.

[Rockgirl]

This was actually not a permanent job but a placement/contract so she knew it was going to end but just never told me upfront....or ever.

I think you all give people too much benefit of the doubt. My guess is when the money runs out she'll be taken from my care and given to grandma.

Do you have a policy about children only being present when both parents are working? If not, dcm probably assumes she is free to use the spot she is paying for.

As far as us giving people the benefit of the doubt, it's a non-issue for many of us....we don't care if parents are working, playing, shopping, etc. Pay on time, pick up on time, follow my policies, and you're good here!

The great thing is, we each get to choose how to run our own daycares, so if it's a deal-breaker for a parent not working to drop off their child, write it into your contract, and enforce it.

[Thriftylady]

Do you have a policy about children only being present when both parents are working? If not, dcm probably assumes she is free to use the spot she is paying for.

As far as us giving people the benefit of the doubt, it's a non-issue for many of us....we don't care if parents are working, playing, shopping, etc. Pay on time, pick up on time, follow my policies, and you're good here!

The great thing is, we each get to choose how to run our own daycares, so if it's a deal-breaker for a parent not working to drop off their child, write it into your contract, and enforce it.

This. The only time I really have an issue with it is when it is evening/nighttime hours. I do offer those for my nurse mom when she gets held over because someone calls in. During the daytime hours, I am available for whatever but she knows after 6PM, it is for work only.

[Blackcat31]

Just in case, I want to point out that the unregistered posters are not all the OP.

There is more than one unregistered poster posting.