Advice-Should I Stay Open?

[kristinhomedaycare]

So I opened my daycare 6 months ago. I used to do daycare a long time ago at a center and I remember liking it and not being so stressed out. I decided to have more time with my daughter at home and to do daycare. She is 6 but she is off at 3:30 from schools so I do get to see her from 3:30 until the kids leave at 5:30. I used to work at a bank and work until around 7pm every night and not get home until she was almost in bed so I decided to try to work closer to home. My sister was also moving to town and has a 3 year old and I wanted to have more of a role in her life. So daycare seemed a good fit.

Now 6 months later I'm going crazy. I have good parents. Some are annoying sometimes but all are pretty good. I have a long wait list and a really good income coming in. My kids are learning so much and I am really good at lesson planning, being organized, and being a business owner. However, I'm not too happy. I'm stressed out every day with the kids. I find myself getting angry at them for doing things they should be doing. Like climbing on everything and being normal toddlers and throwing tantrums. I don't know why but it's like I've lost my patience. I would never hurt a kid or anything but I just am so grumpy all the time and finding myself sometimes losing it and yelling at them. I also am getting really irritated with them ruining my stuff. I don't get paid enough for them to ruin my blinds and my daughters toys. My daughter also hates the daycare and doesn't want the other kids in the house. She doesn't want the constant noise and chaos. She's fine with sharing some of her toys but not all of her toys. She has decided she doesn't like it so she runs next door to my mother in laws so that defeats the purpose of me doing this and I don't get to see her any more than I did then. So I decided I should probably close as this isn't the best fit for me. Do I need to do something different and keep trying since it's only been 6 months? I seriously just had 2 families leave other families to come to me and I feel bad. Should I try to close soon to make it easier for families so they don't' get more attached? Or my other idea was to stay open until may and then it will be about a year I was open and then give my notice to do something else? I am worried how my families with react? I feel so horrible for changing their life plans and then thinking this might not be for me. Or I could just be having a few bad weeks and overreacting to the situation.

[spedmommy4]

So I opened my daycare 6 months ago. I used to do daycare a long time ago at a center and I remember liking it and not being so stressed out. I decided to have more time with my daughter at home and to do daycare. She is 6 but she is off at 3:30 from schools so I do get to see her from 3:30 until the kids leave at 5:30. I used to work at a bank and work until around 7pm every night and not get home until she was almost in bed so I decided to try to work closer to home. My sister was also moving to town and has a 3 year old and I wanted to have more of a role in her life. So daycare seemed a good fit.

Now 6 months later I'm going crazy. I have good parents. Some are annoying sometimes but all are pretty good. I have a long wait list and a really good income coming in. My kids are learning so much and I am really good at lesson planning, being organized, and being a business owner. However, I'm not too happy. I'm stressed out every day with the kids. I find myself getting angry at them for doing things they should be doing. Like climbing on everything and being normal toddlers and throwing tantrums. I don't know why but it's like I've lost my patience. I would never hurt a kid or anything but I just am so grumpy all the time and finding myself sometimes losing it and yelling at them. I also am getting really irritated with them ruining my stuff. I don't get paid enough for them to ruin my blinds and my daughters toys. My daughter also hates the daycare and doesn't want the other kids in the house. She doesn't want the constant noise and chaos. She's fine with sharing some of her toys but not all of her toys. She has decided she doesn't like it so she runs next door to my mother in laws so that defeats the purpose of me doing this and I don't get to see her any more than I did then. So I decided I should probably close as this isn't the best fit for me. Do I need to do something different and keep trying since it's only been 6 months? I seriously just had 2 families leave other families to come to me and I feel bad. Should I try to close soon to make it easier for families so they don't' get more attached? Or my other idea was to stay open until may and then it will be about a year I was open and then give my notice to do something else? I am worried how my families with react? I feel so horrible for changing their life plans and then thinking this might not be for me. Or I could just be having a few bad weeks and overreacting to the situation.

In your shoes, I would identify the pros and cons. Then I would sit down and figure out if the cons are something fixable.

For example, would shortening your hours reduce your stress?
Would learning and implementing some new behavior strategies that improved the majority of the challenging behavior make the job more enjoyable?
Is there a way to segregate your daughters toys so that she has her own space?

If you can eliminate the big stressors then stay open. If not, move on. Give notice as you specify in your handbook. The parents will move on. Some will understand. Some will be upset. There is nothing you can do to prevent it. I wouldn't stress over it.

[Thriftylady]

I agree make two lists. However as far as your DD, I believe she is right. She shouldn't have to share all of her toys. We all have things (even as adults) that we just don't want to share. For instance, for me it is my laptop, I can't stand anyone else to use it. Do you allow the DCKs in her bedroom? I would consider not doing so if you do and she can keep some things she doesn't want to share in there. As far as the other maybe consider what is really stressing you out. Are you trying to hard with lesson planning and such? Would more free play solve some of your issues? After you figure out what is really causing you stress, and look at if there are ways to fix those things or not, you can make a decision.

[mommyneedsadayoff]

:hug:

It's totally normal to feel this way! I use to go through periods of this every now and again and it really went with the seasons. In the winter, especially, being cooped up so much would make the kids act like little nutcases and I had much thinner patience. For me, it was best to take a long weekend at that point and reboot. I would clean house, swap out toys, plan activities and meals so it would the days go smoother and most of all...just relax and enjoy some time with my family! I would usually come back refreshed, even though it didn't always last long.

I agree with the others. Are there changes you can make to make your day easier? Less hours, less kids, a different format? Sometimes just making a few changes can help you feel lighter each day.

The important thing is to do what is best for you and your family. If it is not working and you don't want to do it, then don't let your dcp's hold you hostage. It is not healthy for you. They will get over it and you will be happy! Also, one ting that is so different from working in a daycare center and doing in home care is that you don't always feel like you ever leave work. It can be very draining on you and your family. I would definitely let your daughter pick out her toys she wants to herself and keep her bedroom off limits to the other kids. If she needs "me" time, she can go to her room and have some and tehn come back out when she is ready. I do this with my kids now and they love it. Being around other kids all the time is exhausting, so they need a space and stuff to call their very own.

If you think you are just in a slump, I would call in sick or take a personal day on MOnday and see if the long weekend helps you feel better. And if you still are not happy with it, then start looking for other jobs outside the home that will allow you to be home with your daughter after school. Sometimes just looking for something different can help boost the mood. It makes it exciting to think of what could be Don't be hard on yourself though! It is a tough job and I can say all this, because I am closing and will be pretty much done by next friday, so I am so excited to go in a new direction! The sky is the limit!

[childcaremom]

You've gotten some good advice! I think we've all been there at some point.

Don't worry about your dcps. They will survive. If you want out now, if you want out later. Do what you need to do!

[Fiddlesticks]

I agree with everyone else, your daughter needs her own space and toys. I have separate space for my daycare. Our formal living room and dining room are daycare rooms and are gated off from the rest of the house, the only other room the daycare children are allowed in is the main level bathroom. The littlest ones do sleep in pack and plays upstairs, but otherwise the rest of the house is off limits to the daycare children. My children (18 and 12) have the rest of the house to themselves. They can choose to spend time with the daycare children (my daughter always does) or have their own space (my son always chooses to hang out in the basement). The separate space means I don't have the daycare children on our furniture at all, they cannot break any of our things because they do not have access to it. In the past, when my children were younger, the daycare was all through the house, now that it is confined to two rooms I feel like I live in a home again rather than a daycare. It has also allowed me to look at this as my career rather than my life, which makes it easier to take their typical and normal yet annoyingly crazy behavior in stride.

[littletots]

You tried, it wasn't a fit, close & move on. Maybe work at your daughters school?