Term or Not?

[mickey2]

I have been a caregiver for almost 30 years. I had an in home childcare for many years while my four children were small and then when they stated school I went back to work. I worked 10 years in a nursing home and then started childcare again for the second time as I missed it so much! I love what I do! There is nothing more rewarding to me than to know that I am making a difference in a child's life! In all these years I have never termed a child and I have had many! The situation is this. I have a 17 month old girl who is great, parents are great, however I never know when they are bringing her. She can come twice a week or more. never has been here a full week, however parents pay for the whole week as I charge for everyday unless I cancel. Mom is now pregnant and expecting in April. This is a high risk pregnancy and mom is not sure what she is going to do once baby is born. It will all depend on the health of the new baby. Mom we (will call her "Mel") has stated several times that she wants to keep bringing the little girl.

I received a call yesterday from someone looking for childcare for March when returning to work after her own maternity leave is up. She definitely wants me to care for her child although we have never met. She was referred to me by a close friend whose children I cared for for 4 years. I told her that I would speak to "Mel" when she dropped off the little girl today and suggest she just go on call or occasional. Well, Mel never showed up yesterday but did call saying she was not coming but that she would see me today. Today she never showed up and never called.

Last week I was off on Monday. Tuesday Mel kept girl home Wednesday and Thursday she came. Friday she kept girl home. Payday is Friday, but when she called on Friday telling me she was keeping girl home she said she would send husband to pay me. I told her to wait till Monday when she brought girl. (I live 20 minutes away) Yesterday when she called to say she was not bringing girl again she said she would come out later and bring the money. Again I told her to wait until today not to make a special trip. Today no-show, no call. I am not worried about the money, I am fortunate to be in a position where I am doing daycare because I love it and do not need the money immediately and I believe she will pay! I am just concerned that if I turn this prospective client away that in a few weeks mom is going to decide she does not want to pay for daycare when she is keeping the child home.

I know this is long. Thanks everyone. :-)

[laundrymom]

I would term mel and enroll new kid. Go with the gut.

[countrymom]

that would drive me crazy, did she sign a contract with her hours. I think you either have to tell her that she needs to have more stable hours or that you have a full time child coming with stable hours.

[mickey2]

that would drive me crazy, did she sign a contract with her hours. I think you either have to tell her that she needs to have more stable hours or that you have a full time child coming with stable hours.

She is supposed to bring child from 8 30 to 4 30 M-F
She only comes 2-3 times a week and never shows up until after 10 30 but ALWAYS picks up by 4 30.
She also always pays for the full week whether here or not. My concern is she is going to get tired of paying when not coming and I will have let a "good one get away".

[laundrymom]

do you have room for both? I mean, will you have room for mels older and younger?

She is supposed to bring child from 8 30 to 4 30 M-F
She only comes 2-3 times a week and never shows up until after 10 30 but ALWAYS picks up by 4 30.
She also always pays for the full week whether here or not. My concern is she is going to get tired of paying when not coming and I will have let a "good one get away".

[Keri'sKids]

It sounds to me that you are a rather stable person always being on the job and keeping your word whether or not your client does. Please, stop giving her more time to pay or letting her get out of going out of her way to pay you. This whole thing comes down to respect. You, by being nice, are actually teaching her to disrespect you and your terms of payment. She views it as if you don't have respect for yourself/business and what you deserve why should she. Let her come pay you. She prefers a provider who respects others and herself as well. Expecting respect and giving it keeps everyone in line.

[Terri7]

No Show/ No Payment

I have a huge problem with the lack of respect this DC mom is displayed to you. I would call her and explain to her nicely. I am concerned since you are not showing up on our agreed upon time schedule for child care. I am sorry, but this payment schedule isn't working for me either.

Hopefully, you have a contract with her that states specific payment times. Per our contract I need to be paid on the day we agreed upon. Would you like to discuss any concerns or issues that you might be having with the day care. Is your child having a hard time adjusting? Maybe we need to adjust the days and the rate to fit the days you will be using. Maybe you don't need a full time spot, and only need a part time spot. The spot you currently have is a full-time spot, my full-time/part-time spots are not pro-rated and have to paid for in full prior to the week starting not at end of the week.

If you don't have a part-time spot open tell her she will need to find care elsewhere, because you only have so many part-time spots and they are all taken at this time. This full-time spot has to remain a full-time spot, and still has to be paid as a full-time spot. Ask her if you can drop by later this afternoon/evening to pick up the money she already owes you. Let her know that when and if a part-time spot opens up you will call her back at that time. We work hard for our money do not let her off the hook that easy you did the work you are entitled to get for that work.

[Former Teacher]

I have been a caregiver for almost 30 years. I had an in home childcare for many years while my four children were small and then when they stated school I went back to work. I worked 10 years in a nursing home and then started childcare again for the second time as I missed it so much! I love what I do! There is nothing more rewarding to me than to know that I am making a difference in a child's life! In all these years I have never termed a child and I have had many! The situation is this. I have a 17 month old girl who is great, parents are great, however I never know when they are bringing her. She can come twice a week or more. never has been here a full week, however parents pay for the whole week as I charge for everyday unless I cancel. Mom is now pregnant and expecting in April. This is a high risk pregnancy and mom is not sure what she is going to do once baby is born. It will all depend on the health of the new baby. Mom we (will call her "Mel") has stated several times that she wants to keep bringing the little girl.

I received a call yesterday from someone looking for childcare for March when returning to work after her own maternity leave is up. She definitely wants me to care for her child although we have never met. She was referred to me by a close friend whose children I cared for for 4 years. I told her that I would speak to "Mel" when she dropped off the little girl today and suggest she just go on call or occasional. Well, Mel never showed up yesterday but did call saying she was not coming but that she would see me today. Today she never showed up and never called.

Last week I was off on Monday. Tuesday Mel kept girl home Wednesday and Thursday she came. Friday she kept girl home. Payday is Friday, but when she called on Friday telling me she was keeping girl home she said she would send husband to pay me. I told her to wait till Monday when she brought girl. (I live 20 minutes away) Yesterday when she called to say she was not bringing girl again she said she would come out later and bring the money. Again I told her to wait until today not to make a special trip. Today no-show, no call. I am not worried about the money, I am fortunate to be in a position where I am doing daycare because I love it and do not need the money immediately and I believe she will pay! I am just concerned that if I turn this prospective client away that in a few weeks mom is going to decide she does not want to pay for daycare when she is keeping the child home.

I know this is long. Thanks everyone. :-)

Not to be rude or anything but it is late ::

Mel is paying a full time spot. My thinking is that you are upset because you never know when she is coming in. Why would that upset you? You are getting paid regardless.

I understand that you are upset because she is holding off on the payment. However, tomorrow (or whenever she or you contact each other again), simply tell her that payment is due. No more beating around the bush.

As for this March baby, I know you would love to have that child. However alot can happen from now until then. If you do decide to go with this baby, just make sure you get some kind of holding fee and deposit.

Good Luck!

[Cat Herder]

The first thing that came to mind was "a bird in the hand is worth two in the bush" ::::

This is almost that theory to a "T".

[Daycare_Mama]

The first thing that came to mind was "a bird in the hand is worth two in the bush" ::::

This is almost that theory to a "T".

COMPLETELY agree. That's what I thought when reading OP's question, too.

I would keep what you have. You're getting paid for a full week and she's only coming PT. That sounds like a good deal for you. Plus, if "Mel" hasn't given you an idication that she is seriously considering leaving your care, I wouldn't worry about it. Bottom line, she's paying you now and if she decides to keep her daughter home in a few months when new baby is born, then you can deal with that then.

I'm guessing that if this new potential mom REALLY wants her baby to come to you because of the recommendation, that if the family you have now left, that she would be more than willing to send her baby to you on short notice. At least this is how I would feel if I had to take my 2nd choice daycare provider and my 1st choice called and said, "I had a spot open up". I would be willing to lose money to go to my 1st choice.

So, I would be happy with what you have (sounds like a good family) and worry about replacing them if that time comes.

[dEHmom]

By the sounds of it, ChildrenFirst is concerned about the prospective client that could be coming in.

Just call a meeting or have a chat with "Mel". Let her know your position. Even though she is paying full time regardless of what they use, you are still in a position of twiddling your thumbs half the time. You are making the money, but not doing the work. And for some, that's a big no no. You're not "earning" the money. Not that any of it is your fault. But by the lack of disrespect the mom is showing you, I wouldn't stand for it! You need to discuss this with her. If she pays by cheque, I'd suggest she leaves you post dated cheques then, with her being so wonky.
When new baby comes, she's going to take off some time for sure. It might even be a few months. Will she continue to pay you during that time? In Canada working moms almost always take 1 yr off. Some go back between 6-9 months because they get bored at home. Its so strange to me that you all get newborns in your daycare.

Maybe you can tell this new mom coming in that, you will have a spot opening up at the time this baby is due to be born. Have Mel fill out a temp withdrawal form or something, and put in there that if a part time or full time spot should open up, you'd be happy to take her on when she is ready to start dcg again.

If she wants to continue paying you full time rates and you schedule her for part time hours from 10:30-4:30 2 times a week, then let her! you know what her hours are, tell her these are the hours I'm available for you. End of story.

[mickey2]

Thanks everyone for your replies and advice.

The reason I was letting Mel get away with these things for the past two months is because she found out that there was a serious defect with her unborn baby and she has had to travel back and forth to see specialists 8 hours away from where we live. Since I found this out I was cutting her a LOT of slack. I love this family and they have always been great with paying and everything!

That is why I was having such a hard time deciding what to do. I was thinking that she might want to cut back to part time hours or only a few days a week as she is no longer working and it has been costing a lot to travel out of town so often. I know without a doubt that she loves bringing her daughter here and wants to bring both children back in September as long as everything goes well with her new baby. I am not sure what the medical term for it is, but apparently the baby has an opening in its skull and there is a small amount of brain matter outside the skull. The specialists that they saw did a lot of ultrasounds and tests and baby is supposed to be perfectly fine with surgery.

I did speak with Mel. I explained that I had another family who desperately wanted me to provide care (They called 4 times) and we decided that she would go 2-3 days a week until the new family starts, then perhaps one day a week until September. I have 2 going to school at that time.

New family is starting in March for sure! I interviewed them Sunday evening and they are a very nice family and I am sure will be an excellent fit. I only accept families that I like!

I am really excited, dcb1 will be 2.5 and dcb2 will be 1 year. Perfect ages for my existing little group.

[javamama]

Sounds like everything is going to work out perfectly! Yay you!