Is there a way to word this

[childcaremom]

So that I can get parents on board with dcg's behaviour? I've posted about her before. She is just 12 months but insists on screaming and crying and throwing fits whenever she can't get her way. I have been wanting to give her the benefit of the doubt as she has been sick a few times since starting but we are on week 4 and she is still the same way.

Most of her behaviours I can work with (grabbing toys, dumping, hitting) but the constant screaming and demanding is driving me batty. I am ignoring most of it but I think I need to get mom on board to make it stop.

How to word it in a way that frames it positively?

I put her back on 2 naps today and it helped a bit but she is still throwing fits and trying to hit me when I stop her from doing something less than desirable.

Thanks for any help!

[laundrymom]

I would ask them their response when she tantrums. I would suggest to be on the same page.
Maybe.

Hey Sara, when Helmsley screams I usually look into her eyes, and walk away. It seems to have shortened her outbursts and I make sure to give extra cuddles when she is playing nicely with me.
If you could try to mimic this at home it would probably cut her crying down to almost nothing and she would enjoy her days so
Much more.

Always show the benefit to the child. Parents need to see how changing their behavior will benefit them. Not us.

[SilverSabre25]

I often start a conversation like this by asking if they're seeing it at home. That can usually lead into "how do you handle it" and "I've been. ... and it seems to be working. Maybe it would help when she's at home too? " I go at it like I'm trying to do them a huge favor to help this distressing problem. So far I've had good responses... and a few who start asking me "hey how do you handle. .." and "what do you do when. .." kinds of questions. Only ever did one parent brush my advice off. .. but she also brushed off her son's dramatic speech delay as "his teacher will fix it in kindergarten, it's not my problem" so she doesn't count... :confused:

[Ariana]

I often start a conversation like this by asking if they're seeing it at home. That can usually lead into "how do you handle it" and "I've been. ... and it seems to be working. Maybe it would help when she's at home too? " I go at it like I'm trying to do them a huge favor to help this distressing problem. So far I've had good responses... and a few who start asking me "hey how do you handle. .." and "what do you do when. .." kinds of questions. Only ever did one parent brush my advice off. .. but she also brushed off her son's dramatic speech delay as "his teacher will fix it in kindergarten, it's not my problem" so she doesn't count... :confused:

I do it this way too. Just have a casual conversation about it and ask a lot of questions and then say what you are doing. I would also make sure to say that if you both have a strategy that is consistent at home and daycare you will have the best possible outcome.

[Heidi]

My new DCM would be shocked to consider that a 12 month old is capable of having a tantrum. He's just a baby!

She was also shocked to find out that he doesn't need 6-8 bottles a day, to be fed baby food (solids Stage 2, once a day at 11 1/2 months?) , and that he can in reality use a spoon (messy, but he manages it pretty well)! She actually thought I was nuts when I said on his first day that he would pretty much eat what the other toddlers do, with careful supervision. Week 3, and he eats as much as a grown man, I swear.

He's also learned how to put himself to sleep without too much distress. Well, it's Monday...so there was some distress, like when we were walking towards his nap room and he started a tantrum..::

OP, I like framing it as a question, too. It sounds more respectful to the parents then just telling them how you want it handled. In the end, you still tell them how you want it handled, I think, but they get input. It's just so much better when every one works together for a common goal, right?