3 SA Kid Challenges. HELP!

[MsLisa]

Would love advise on the following challenges I'm facing.
Sorry so long...

CHALLENGE #1: HOMEWORK TIME
We are to encourage, but never force, our SA kids to do their homework. We have a set time every day, except Friday, from 3:00pm to 4:30 to get it done. Then it's open play or gym time, regardless if they are done or not. Since most of them are in 3rd grade, most of them do their homework together here willingly. But I also have 3 kindergarten-ers & 1 first grader who either don't have homework at all or at least not as often. There are obviously days when some kids prefer to do it at home, so we tell them to go play QUIETLY till homework time is up. That's the challenge.....No matter how many reminders I give or have to yell, these kids can not seem to play quietly during homework time. There are plenty of quiet options in the room, from puzzles and books to legos and art supplies. But they just don't get it and I’m tired of repeating myself. IDEAS?

CHALLENGE #2: "I WANT MY MOMMY!"
I have a 5yr old Kindergarten boy who has a literal meltdown every morning at drop off.
He was in our Pre-K program prior and was never a problem when his parents left every day then. Now he's amongst the SA kids and he's basically become like a toddler again. He won't let his parents leave, cries/screams non-stop and tries to run out after them. He'll then starts the crying of "I want my mommy!". This may eventually stop due to other kids being a distraction and by then his mom has called to "make sure he's ok". She doen't understand why he's become this way. His bus is last so when it's just him and one other kid, he immediately starts up again.
No matter how I approach him, it doesn't seem to work. He get super worked up. I believe its part anxiety and part troubles in school. His older brothers are known "evil kids" so I can't help but assume he's getting a little unfair prejudgement by his teacher. He says school is hard, he doesn't understand anything, and etc. He broke his arm before school started so he missed a lot of days as well and can't join recess or gym. I'm at a loss how to make the mornings easier for this dude.
(He's perfectly fine (albeit whiny) and SUPER hyper after school. ) Suggestions?

CHALLENGE #3: SASSY LITTLE BACK TALKER
I have a 6yr old 1st grade girl who has a horrible habit of back talking. You ask her to clean up her mess, its a mouthy no. You tell her to get her backpack on, hang it up, stop doing something, etc...it's a mouthy no or "i don't have to". Or she'll simply battle you with some excuse why she won't/can't/shouldn't. I've put her in our time out chair for it, but it doesn't phase her. Taking things away, depending on the item, upsets her a little but not for long. It infuriates my assistant and after a while pushes my buttons too. Even the other kids have told her she needs to stop cause its bad. Her favourite line is "your not the boss of me." to the other kids and sometimes us as well.
I've told the mom gently that she's got a "sassy mouth" and her mom just laughed and said "yeah that's her".
Thoughts?


I look forward to your suggestions! lovethis

[daycarediva]

1. Separate them. As soon as they come in, have rotating stations set up. They all eat snack together, then Jack goes to Legos, Joe goes to the art center and John goes to the block center. Rotate on a timer. When it goes off (30m/ish, so 3 times?) homework is over and they can go free play.

2. He's having a hard time adjusting to being an older child, new school, new room, lots of new/older/bigger kids. Explain that to Mom. Have her do SHORT drop offs, remind him "Mom is here after ____" and leave it be. Nothing else you can do.

3. If she sasses, I would remove whatever it is she enjoys. "You're allowed to not want to do XYZ, but you are NOT allowed to speak to me that way." If you have to give her a space away from everyone else for not speaking nicely- do so. Also, don't engage. Make the space, give her the ultimatum, then point her there when she sasses.

[laundrymom]

I wouldn't give the option of being on their own until they earn it. Id give them something to do in front of me u til they could prove they can let
The others concentrate. Be it a puzzle or reading at the table.

#2

Sounds like he's exhausted. And probably feeling a bit lost in the shuffle of big kid school. Maybe let him sit/lie in a quiet spot until he can gather his feelings? And find some control.

#3
Lol. She'd be spending a fair amount of time sitting by herself. And if mom said that...
I'd probably answer that it is unacceptable and she needs to stop it or you'll have to terminate care.
In my experience, that attitude breeds easily in a childcare setting.

But I'm kind of old and strict. Maybe one of the you gets will have better advice.

Would love advise on the following challenges I'm facing.
Sorry so long...

CHALLENGE #1: HOMEWORK TIME
We are to encourage, but never force, our SA kids to do their homework. We have a set time every day, except Friday, from 3:00pm to 4:30 to get it done. Then it's open play or gym time, regardless if they are done or not. Since most of them are in 3rd grade, most of them do their homework together here willingly. But I also have 3 kindergarten-ers & 1 first grader who either don't have homework at all or at least not as often. There are obviously days when some kids prefer to do it at home, so we tell them to go play QUIETLY till homework time is up. That's the challenge.....No matter how many reminders I give or have to yell, these kids can not seem to play quietly during homework time. There are plenty of quiet options in the room, from puzzles and books to legos and art supplies. But they just don't get it and I’m tired of repeating myself. IDEAS?

CHALLENGE #2: "I WANT MY MOMMY!"
I have a 5yr old Kindergarten boy who has a literal meltdown every morning at drop off.
He was in our Pre-K program prior and was never a problem when his parents left every day then. Now he's amongst the SA kids and he's basically become like a toddler again. He won't let his parents leave, cries/screams non-stop and tries to run out after them. He'll then starts the crying of "I want my mommy!". This may eventually stop due to other kids being a distraction and by then his mom has called to "make sure he's ok". She doen't understand why he's become this way. His bus is last so when it's just him and one other kid, he immediately starts up again.
No matter how I approach him, it doesn't seem to work. He get super worked up. I believe its part anxiety and part troubles in school. His older brothers are known "evil kids" so I can't help but assume he's getting a little unfair prejudgement by his teacher. He says school is hard, he doesn't understand anything, and etc. He broke his arm before school started so he missed a lot of days as well and can't join recess or gym. I'm at a loss how to make the mornings easier for this dude.
(He's perfectly fine (albeit whiny) and SUPER hyper after school. ) Suggestions?

CHALLENGE #3: SASSY LITTLE BACK TALKER
I have a 6yr old 1st grade girl who has a horrible habit of back talking. You ask her to clean up her mess, its a mouthy no. You tell her to get her backpack on, hang it up, stop doing something, etc...it's a mouthy no or "i don't have to". Or she'll simply battle you with some excuse why she won't/can't/shouldn't. I've put her in our time out chair for it, but it doesn't phase her. Taking things away, depending on the item, upsets her a little but not for long. It infuriates my assistant and after a while pushes my buttons too. Even the other kids have told her she needs to stop cause its bad. Her favourite line is "your not the boss of me." to the other kids and sometimes us as well.
I've told the mom gently that she's got a "sassy mouth" and her mom just laughed and said "yeah that's her".
Thoughts?


I look forward to your suggestions! lovethis

[Play Care]

1. Separate them. As soon as they come in, have rotating stations set up. They all eat snack together, then Jack goes to Legos, Joe goes to the art center and John goes to the block center. Rotate on a timer. When it goes off (30m/ish, so 3 times?) homework is over and they can go free play.

2. He's having a hard time adjusting to being an older child, new school, new room, lots of new/older/bigger kids. Explain that to Mom. Have her do SHORT drop offs, remind him "Mom is here after ____" and leave it be. Nothing else you can do.

3. If she sasses, I would remove whatever it is she enjoys. "You're allowed to not want to do XYZ, but you are NOT allowed to speak to me that way." If you have to give her a space away from everyone else for not speaking nicely- do so. Also, don't engage. Make the space, give her the ultimatum, then point her there when she sasses.

This.

I do wonder about outside time? My SA kids are wild off the bus and we get outside as soon as they've finished snack and used the bathroom. Granted I'm not an SA provider necessarily (I usually only have a couple if they have a younger sib here) and I close at 4:30 so parents don't expect homework to be done. I think if you could get everyone out for a bit you could then work Divas suggestion (centers during homework time) in better cause the kids would have gotten the wiggles out.

[childcaremom]

When I did an after school program, the first thing we did was have snack time. So everyone can come in, chill, have a bite, and chit chat with friends.

Are you able to give them a bit of downtime initially? (I prefer the idea of outside time but not sure if that's an option for you)

Then...

We broke into groups to do our thing. I really like the station idea. One of the stations could be homework.

We had a head table so that anyone that wasn't listening had to sit at that table until told they could rejoin their group. I don't know how much supervision help you have but until they had the routine down pat I would be firm about that.

I like the suggestions that you've received for the other issues.

[Cat Herder]

Snack > Play outside 30 minutes > Then homework

Even better if snack is served outside. lovethis

They have to be quiet and sit still most of the day... it is unnatural

[Laurel]

Snack > Play outside 30 minutes > Then homework

Even better if snack is served outside. lovethis

They have to be quiet and sit still most of the day... it is unnatural

It is unnatural. This reminds me of a school I had my daughter in. It was preschool but in the next room was elementary. It was Montessori so 3 ages grouped together. I think it was 6, 7 and 8 year olds in the same classroom. They kept the door open to the outside on the elementary side and children were able to work inside or outside or just run around or use the playground equipment at will. They did have a checklist of things to accomplish throughout the day but if they were feeling antsy they could go outside for a while. That was so very cool! It was a university teaching school so there were always plenty of interns to help and top notch equipment/supplies.

That is the way it should be.

Laurel

[Play Care]

It is unnatural. This reminds me of a school I had my daughter in. It was preschool but in the next room was elementary. It was Montessori so 3 ages grouped together. I think it was 6, 7 and 8 year olds in the same classroom. They kept the door open to the outside on the elementary side and children were able to work inside or outside or just run around or use the playground equipment at will. They did have a checklist of things to accomplish throughout the day but if they were feeling antsy they could go outside for a while. That was so very cool! It was a university teaching school so there were always plenty of interns to help and top notch equipment/supplies.

That is the way it should be.

Laurel

That sounds amazing!

[MsLisa]

Wonderful suggestions everyone.

#1.

• I try to get homework done ASAP cause a few do leave before 4:30pm and I figured just to get it out of the way. I know the LAST thing they want to do is sit and do more work so that probably doesn't help. But at the same time I feel the pressure of having them complete it because the parents really do appreciate it. A lot of other afterschool programs around me apparently don't even have them do their homework, which is why most parents left them.
• We do have access to outdoors, but its the Pre-K's little playground. Its not a big space and the jungle gym is rather small and low to the ground. I'm not sure if all my 3rd graders would care for it. But I may give it a shot now that the weather has cooled down. Maybe bring a bubble machine and etc out. I'm just afraid of them misusing the equipment, getting even more "ram-y" and I end up yelling the entire time.
• Snacks we sadly don't supply. Most bring their own or save something from lunch. We have an organic-based vending machine but its expensive. I do give out a small treat to those who get 90+'s on tests. We have an account at a local grocery store but haven't gotten around to getting the number so I can at least pick up some generic cereal for them to munch on like I did for camp. We use to have snack program but they always ended up sending us rotten or stale food, then making us jump through hoops, so we cancelled that.

#2. Amazingly he did perfect today. Walked right in, gave 2 hugs and wandered off to the foosball table. I imagine his mom most likely gave him a very strict talking to after yesterday. He was even fine at bus time, playing "shark boy" with the other kid to pass the time. I told him I was proud of him and that’s the big boy I know he can be. So hopefully that's the end of that....till Monday. .

#3. Her attitude has made her no friends in the room that's for sure and they often report to me about her bossy remarks. As a few of you suggested I may just take her away from things, with no more warnings and make her sit next to my desk. You can tell she gets no repercussions at home.

[Leigh]

With your backtalker, don't engage her. Tell her once and when she doesn't comply, go straight to the consequence and don't explain why. She knows why. This approach works miracles with my sassy, stubborn foster daughter.