Tweet
Dcm just texted me (dcg left at 2:30) and said she has a black eye and her other eye has a dark circle on it and she feels warm! She was perfectly fine when she left, but I know bruises can take a while to appear, but nothing happened today that would cause that. She is 7 months old and crawling, but there were no incidence, so i don't even know how to respond! This is her 4 th week here and mom is a bit over protective (by her own admission), but crap! A 7 month old with two black eyes?? I am freaking out here, because I am 100% sure she had no injuries today other than tipping on her back on the carpet (lost her balance chewing on a toy), but there were no red marks or anything. What do I say? Should I have her send me a picture? This is the first time of this happening to me!
-
-
"Thanks for the head's up mom. I assure you she was fine when she left here today and we did not have any incidents here today that could have resulted in a black eye, let alone two of them. If you have any additional concerns, please let me know! See you tomorrow!"
I would answer matter-of-factly and without one bit of uncertainty. Especially since you know she was not hurt/injured at your house on your watch.
Like professionalism or confidence....fake it until you make it and LEAD the way verses letting mom do it.
-
If she got the black eyes at your house they would have been very very red at pickup time so I would just tell the mom the truth. Nothing happened and then reiterate that her eyes were perfectly normal when she picked her up. Also ask to see pictures....mom might be exaggerating.Comment
-
She sent a picture, but they don't look like black eyes. It looks like she has been rubbing her eyes (she only napped 40 minutes) and there is a red mark under one eye. I think she is overreacting, but telling me a baby in my care has two black eyes is NOT sitting well with me.Comment
-
I know I may be over reacting, but I have never had this situation and I am so mad. Two black eyes is not something I take lightly and she said she is waiting to hear from her doc, so I am not sure what to think. I wish I had flipping cameras in my house, because I cannot handle these moms and their insinuations (accusations) that I am responsible for every bump on their kid. She was here for 5 hours and she is my youngest, so she only gets free range play when I am on the ground with her. She was with mom for more hours today than me, yet I am the one to blame???Comment
-
I agree with BC require a doctors appointment and letter before return. Maybe I am paranoid, but one of my biggest fears is that I will get accused of something that happened at home.Comment
-
If, for some odd reason, the child does have 2 black eyes it's more likely she bumped her nose (which can cause two instantaneous black eyes) than was hit or hurt on both eyes. In that case all it would take is a normal fall from a toddler to cause it.
However, I've seen this before and it was...wait for it...ALLERGIES! The rubbing of the eyes made them red, the allergies made them swollen, it didn't look like two black eyes to me either but of course first time mom was adamant the eyes were black until the doctor told her otherwise. That might have been the first and only time I accepted allergies as an excuse for anything.
I completely agree with the PP to just reiterate that the child was fine when she left your house and I would have no problem asking that the child be seen by a physician before returning to care.Comment
-
I know how you feel
I recently had a kid come here with a scrape on the inside of his arm...looked like cat scratches...well DCM, hours after pickup, texted me with a photo of the scratches and accused me of letting MY CAT around the kids. I texted DCM back:
"I'm sorry but:
1. I don't HAVE a cat!
2. They were there when he got here!
3. I texted you about it earlier today!"
To which DCM texted back about an hour later: "NVM, I got your message but didn't read it...oh, and daddy said he got it yesterday when at his friends house."
Grrrrrr!!!!Comment
-
She's a first time mom. I was a nut job when my daughter was born. She is 17 now, and somehow survived. I was lucky that I didn't have to work. I would have been the worst daycare parent ever!
I kinda understand what it's like now though. My 20m dcb has been with me since birth and his mom was super uptight at first. She sent me an emergency text at 10pm asking if he had been bitten by bugs here? I asked her to text me a pic and when she did I realized it was hives and told her to call the pediatrician asap. Turns out he was allergic to strawberries. I could have taken it personally, but I just saw it as a young first time mom asking the advice of someone that she trusts. Your dcm might not be accusing you, she might just want your opinion.
I have a very unusual relationship with my dcps though. I only have 3 families, all of which are excellent parents. I keep things professional, but I'm always available to talk or give advice when they need it.Comment
-
You know you are right! I think this makes sense as well. I sometimes ask my mom if my kids ate something with dairy or soy because I see something on them that might be a hive and my mom gets super defensive. I am just asking so I know where it came from and am not accusing her of anything.Comment
-
I'm so sorry your having to go through this emotional Rollercoaster. Update please. I'm sure dcm will realize it's maybe just overtired eyes from a long day.Comment
-
Allergy shiners is the first thought that popped into my head.Comment
Comment