HELP NEED ADVICE - License Being Denied W/O An Agreement Of Understanding

[Play Care]

I want to share my story in hopes it may enlighten some that seem to be in favor of licensing overstepping legal boundaries.

About 6 years ago, I moved from an enormous urban area to a very small town where everyone knows everyone. I had only lived there a few months when I received a visit from DHS. (Child protective services)

*Spoiler alert: This entire event occurred because the school educated my daughter about safe vs. unsafe touches but didn't specify where people shouldn't touch her.

DHS arrived to accuse my then 12 year old of inappropriately touching his sister. My daughters special education teacher had called in the report to DHS. DHS demanded to speak to both our kids. My son, the accused, wasn't even in the state. He had been with his grandparents all summer, so they talked to my daughter.

She told them that sometimes her brother picks on her, as siblings do, and she didn't like it. She said he had just pushed the week before. (Not possible since he was in another state) When the DHS guy asked her what her areas of her body were private, she answered, "well, my feet, my hands . . . ." They insisted that she was traumatized and needed counseling after talking to her for 10 minutes. (And during this 10 minutes she was giggling, playing, laughing, and even asked when her brother was coming home because she missed him)

DHS launched an investigation and basically harassed me at work and home for months. We finally hired a family law attorney to get them to leave us alone. Two weeks after hiring a lawyer we received an "unfounded" letter in the mail.

After the "investigation" was complete I went and asked the special education teacher specifically what my daughter had said that started the whole nightmare. I kid you not, word for word, it was . . .
DD "My older brother touched an unsafe space"
Teacher "What did he touch?"
DD "My feet" (followed by her giggling) Teacher said she had to call because she couldn't "get anymore out of her"

Note: She also has more than one older brother and NEVER specified which one to the teacher. This incident, despite being unfounded and ridiculous, remains on record with DHS where it occurred. My opinion is certainly colored by this event, but licensing should NOT be looking at those records. The whole purpose of an investigation is to determine if a law was broken.

Here, it was determined that a law was not broken and DHS is imposing a penalty. Not just against you, but against your child as well. Don't sign until you consult an attorney. At least have it reviewed by one. Best . . .

Yup.

I think those that say it should matter, etc have never had the misfortune of being wrongly accused of a crime. Having had a family member go through it (not over a sex crime) I have witnessed first hand how corrupt and ridiculous our system is. Lives are ruined on someone's say so. In the OP's case it sounds like there were never charges, it was cleared and the record is supposed to be sealed.

At the end of the day the people who looked at the case and reviewed it and know the important facts (ie her child's age) have said there is no case. That should have been the end of it. How many of us would be incensed if we had an unfounded abuse allegation from a dck that barred us from future employment?

OP, if I were you, I'd be getting a lawyer to look into why this record isn't sealed. Unfortunately unless you have legal counsel, nothing gets done. But it will be money well spent if your adult son isn't barred from employment, housing, etc.

[nanglgrl]

If I remember right in my state any record of abuse (unfounded or not) stays in our file at DHS and can be viewed for registration purposes or future abuse claims even if unfounded. This is so lets say you have 3 unfounded claims of spanking a dck from 3 different families they can see a pattern and even if they can't find actual evidence they can see a pattern and confirm the case in these situations.

I've known a provider who DHS nit picked to death during the registration process and took forever to register her. I think that although she was following all of the regs her personality and home weren't suited for daycare so they tried to make it as hard on her as possible in the hopes that she'd give up. I could see it from their point of view, when they walk into the providers house and it reeks of dog pee, she sits their cussing and offers them a beer I agree that she's probably not best suited for this profession even if she not breaking any regulations. In this case DHS was right and within a couple months of granting her registration she was shut down for a horrible abuse incident.

I'm not saying that you are in any way like that OP, just wondering if there are other things that bug them causing them to nitpick you because if your story is all there it seems like that's what they are doing. It could just be you got on the wrong side of someone in the office.

I also think they do this to protect their behinds. The last thing they want is for abuse allegations to arise out of a home they deemed worthy to provide childcare so any sign of a past inpropriety puts them in to "protect our butts" mode.

If I were you I would talk to legal counsel. From the story you've posted what they're asking of you seems ridiculous.

[Unregistered]

Your son had sexual contact with a 4 year old? Case dismissed or not, good luck running a home child care business. Wow.

[Rockgirl]

Your son had sexual contact with a 4 year old? Case dismissed or not, good luck running a home child care business. Wow.

No, that is not what OP stated.

[MarinaVanessa]

Your son had sexual contact with a 4 year old? Case dismissed or not, good luck running a home child care business. Wow.

No, there's a 4 year age limit that there has to be if one or both people are under age and dating. In other words if OPs son was 17 then the girl has to be 4 years younger than him or less so at least 13 in order for it to be able to be considered consensual. She explains this a few responses down from the OP.

[Play Care]

Your son had sexual contact with a 4 year old? Case dismissed or not, good luck running a home child care business. Wow.

Proof that reading comprehension is dying...