Never termed anyone before.....I hate this part

[Lovisa]

Hi everyone!

So how do you handle overly paranoid parents? The mom of the infant I watch is driving me kinda insane. I get texts all day long while she is at work telling me to do this or that, don't do this, don't do that, how is he, did he have a dirty diaper, how is my day going with him, etc etc etc. It is never ending. I finally had a talk with her and told her that I can't spend my whole day answering her texts and that she was stressing me out big time. I also mentioned that she is trusting me to care for her son (she repeated over and over how much she appreciates and trusts me) and that my being second guessed all the time is making me feel like she thinks I am inadequate.

She is also freaking out about kids having colds in my home. I have my own children (in school) and school just started so they are bringing stuff home like they always do at the beginning of the year. I explained this from the beginning. She expects me to keep all other kiddos away from her son (which is impossible since I need to give them all equal attention). All of my other dkparents realize that colds will happen and aside from disinfecting toys and not allowing kids to come to daycare with fevers, vomiting, diarrhea, etc, there isn't much else I can do. I can't put her kid in a bubble! She constantly asks about other kids and if they are being nice to her kid or sick or whatever and I feel like the other kids are none of her business!

I have told her that maybe my home isn't a good fit for her. She couldn't believe I said that to her and was shocked I would say such a thing.

I just feel like she is going to keep her kid home when anyone here with so much as a sniffle and I depend on this income to help support my family.

I love the little guy and enjoy caring for him but his mom is driving me insane. I feel like it isn't working but I hate the awkwardness and confrontation of telling her it isn't working. (I know I know.....it is part of the job and I need to get over it):confused:

TIA for any advice (even if it is **** it up and do what you gotta do )

[Thriftylady]

First of all your contract needs to say that you get paid regardless of attendance. So if your rate is $50 a week, you get that even if the parent chooses to keep kiddo home three days that week.

After that, trust is important. If a parent tells me they don't trust me, I don't keep the child. I actually handed back money once saying that "you don't trust me so I can't keep your child". This is important.

[Lovisa]

First of all your contract needs to say that you get paid regardless of attendance. So if your rate is $50 a week, you get that even if the parent chooses to keep kiddo home three days that week.

It's hard because the hours change (because of her job) and so payment amounts change every week. Some days are long and others aren't and I don't know until the day of what it will be. All my other parents pay me in advance, and the price doesn't change because their hours stay the same.

I agree that trust is important. Completely. And that is the main issue I am having. Perhaps I have answered my own question.....

[Thriftylady]

It's hard because the hours change (because of her job) and so payment amounts change every week. Some days are long and others aren't and I don't know until the day of what it will be. All my other parents pay me in advance, and the price doesn't change because their hours stay the same.

I agree that trust is important. Completely. And that is the main issue I am having. Perhaps I have answered my own question.....

Never do payment amount changes each week. If worst comes to worst, average it, but payment is always the same. If she is changing hours each week, you can't fill in that spot with another child, she is still using the spot. It is either a full time or part time slot. If it changes each week, you likely need to bill for full time because it is hard to find another child who can rotate the way she does. DO NOT lower your business income based on her schedule. If anything she needs to pay more not less.

[Lovisa]

Never do payment amount changes each week. If worst comes to worst, average it, but payment is always the same. If she is changing hours each week, you can't fill in that spot with another child, she is still using the spot. It is either a full time or part time slot. If it changes each week, you likely need to bill for full time because it is hard to find another child who can rotate the way she does. DO NOT lower your business income based on her schedule. If anything she needs to pay more not less.

You are so right. She was my first client and I really had no idea what I was doing. Days of the week changes and so do hours so I was unsure how to figure it. I wish I knew better at the time. Since then I haven't made that same mistake.....

[MyAngels]

I wouldn't be able to handle that type of stress for long. Around here infants are plentiful, infant spots are scarce. Do this woman and favor and terminate care. Definitely explain why exactly you are terminating your contract. In the end, if she's lucky, it will serve as a wake up call and she will treat her next provider better.

[midaycare]

The first infant I had (I've only been open 2 years), is only 15 months old. I still get daily texts from dcm, wondering how dcb is. But I know she trusts me... She does want a lot of info, though. I'm not bothered.

Most of my parents are first-timers, and they are worried about everything. I just see it as part of my job to make them more comfortable with my role as provider.

I told one over-zealous dcm I was not a good fit for her after her first month here. She wanted me to change diapers hourly, special this, special that ... When I told her she was a little too intense and didn't seem to trust me, she changed overnight. Now we are friends. Although she moved so dcg isn't here and we are "real" friends

The thing that would bother me the most is that schedule. Yikes!

[rosieteddy]

I would put an end to the constant texting .I would offer a lunch time text of the day so far.Also this could be your time to change contract.Maybe charge a full time fee or at least a daily "base fee "and add on weekly extra hours.If she is using the option of every day then she should be fulltimee.

[Lovisa]

I would put an end to the constant texting .I would offer a lunch time text of the day so far.Also this could be your time to change contract.Maybe charge a full time fee or at least a daily "base fee "and add on weekly extra hours.If she is using the option of every day then she should be fulltimee.

She is 2 days a week, but the hours (can be) crazy long and the days of the week are different every week. Contract change sounds like a good idea.

Thanks for the advice everyone!