How to Deal With Nitpicky Parents?

[littletots]

Dirty shoes - have parents bring play shoes either on kid or to keep at your house.
Allergy - my nut allergy dd also allergic to cedar, pine trees. Gets swollen eyes & headaches if touches bark, tree, pinecone. Benadryl works. Windy days not good. Could there be something outside that triggers red eyes?

[christine19720]

Here I am again, writing about the two new dcgs and their related mom's that just signed up. Today was their first day and I can only say that their children were pretty great. I really like their girls. However, the parents are gonna give me an anxiety attack.

a) My backyard is dirt. They knew that when they signed up. DCG with allergies had a red eye. She also has peanut allergy and asthma. I kept a very close watch on her eye and breathing and noticed nothing, so I did not bring it up with mom immediately, just at pickup. Mom was upset I didn't call her immediately, basically asked me to wash her hands like 4x while outside :-\ She also said she has outdoor allergies, but doesn't take anything daily (just has Clairitin in her emergency bag). I said there is a lot of dirt out there, but we are getting wood chips to cover most. Both of them then freaked out about splinters. I am planning on only getting playground certified chips, and I can't really afford better (assuming they would like rubber mulch). Other DCM was mad her kids shoes got dirty, in my backyard full of dirt.

b) Non allergy DCM packed her kids toothbrush. I don't normally brush teeth after lunch, I didn't see her toothbrush and didn't do it. My handbook does say I do but I have never done it (I wrote it way before I had ANY kids in). Now I suppose I have made sure I have to brush everyone's teeth after nap which isn't the worst.

c) How do you deal with parents who think their kids shouldn't get hurt at all? Like being shoved or pushed by another child? One of the girls got shoved while lining up for the slide and got a VERY tiny scrape with I treated with alcohol, neosporin, and a band-aid. That's actually overzealous for me because normally if it's not streaming blood I just wipe it off with water. I told them what happened and her mom was like about being pushed. Like it or not I cannot be right next to them every second. It's gonna happen. How do you deal with this gracefully?

I don't want to have to try an fill these spots again but I am thinking maybe of returning their deposits and calling it a day ahah.

This is just a preview, and it will get worse. Kids get dirty and hurt sometimes. It all a part of learning and growing up imo.
Return their deposits and wish them all the best with their new nanny.....
This job is stressful enough already, who needs that?

[NillaWafers]

So more of an update, allergy mom called and wanted me to keep the kids inside until we get the wood chips.I told her no, it was part of my program. She said that she was thinking of keeping her home until we have the wood chips and I said that was her prerogative of course. I also offered to refund her deposit and just discontinue care and find another school.

Talked to her this morning and now her daughter just can't play when outside, she is to color and sit with me on the picnic bench. I feel bad for this kid so I'm shortening outdoor time until this is sorted out. It seems like mom really doesn't want to pull her so I think we may be able to come to an amicable decision.

Other mom has said nothing since first day so so far everything is going ok there.

[childcaremom]

So more of an update, allergy mom called and wanted me to keep the kids inside until we get the wood chips.I told her no, it was part of my program. She said that she was thinking of keeping her home until we have the wood chips and I said that was her prerogative of course. I also offered to refund her deposit and just discontinue care and find another school.

Talked to her this morning and now her daughter just can't play when outside, she is to color and sit with me on the picnic bench. I feel bad for this kid so I'm shortening outdoor time until this is sorted out. It seems like mom really doesn't want to pull her so I think we may be able to come to an amicable decision.

Other mom has said nothing since first day so so far everything is going ok there.

Oh my. I would not be changing my program for one child. Group care, group care.

I would be terming and not refunding any fees. Mom knew what your program was (including outdoors) and it would not be negotiable. I would never change my routine for one child.

Sorry, dcm, doesn't seem like my program is a good fit for your daughter. My last day I can provide care would be x date. Good luck with your childcare search.

[Blackcat31]

So more of an update, allergy mom called and wanted me to keep the kids inside until we get the wood chips.I told her no, it was part of my program. She said that she was thinking of keeping her home until we have the wood chips and I said that was her prerogative of course. I also offered to refund her deposit and just discontinue care and find another school.

Talked to her this morning and now her daughter just can't play when outside, she is to color and sit with me on the picnic bench. I feel bad for this kid so I'm shortening outdoor time until this is sorted out. It seems like mom really doesn't want to pull her so I think we may be able to come to an amicable decision.

Other mom has said nothing since first day so so far everything is going ok there.

Call me jaded but I am betting she isn't wanting to come to an amicable compromise, she is simply waiting until you cave or give in.

I think your first instincts about it not being a good fit is probably spot on and personally I'd terminate services. My program spends a GREAT deal of time outdoors and there is no way I'd be willing to make a child sit outdoors while the others played and there is no way I'd be willing to drag crayons and paper out side either.

I'll be curious as to how this all eventually works out.

[KiddieCahoots]

I understand your concern about the substrate not being finished yet, and licensing hubub, but dcm not allowing the dcg to play outside is a bit much. That's what children do, and need. Really feel this dcm will always have something to unreasonably complain about, because (sarcastic alert ) her child is just so "special"

[NillaWafers]

I understand your concern about the substrate not being finished yet, and licensing hubub, but dcm not allowing the dcg to play outside is a bit much. That's what children do, and need. Really feel this dcm will always have something to unreasonably complain about, because (sarcastic alert ) her child is just so "special"

Yes we shall see. She said she would finish the week at least until she could decide. Shortening the time outside isn't 100% because of this girl. It's really humid and about 95 out right now so I just don't want to be out there haha.

Honestly if I can make it past the refund date for their deposits I will be happy. I need the money to do the substrate haha, so them pulling out really affects my plans (and dirt).

[KiddieCahoots]

Yes we shall see. She said she would finish the week at least until she could decide. Shortening the time outside isn't 100% because of this girl. It's really humid and about 95 out right now so I just don't want to be out there haha.

Honestly if I can make it past the refund date for their deposits I will be happy. I need the money to do the substrate haha, so them pulling out really affects my plans (and dirt).

Ahhhh.....Gotcha! I'll keep my fingers crossed for you with more hot days, and extra patience for it to work your way ...::....

[NillaWafers]

Probably my last update, but I have decided to term regardless on friday. Other DCG's mom came to pick up today and was like "so friday is allergy DCGs last day right?". I had to tell her that she hadn't made a decision but she did say she would tell me Friday. So something tells me she already has made one - so whatever. I'm returning their deposits Friday and terminating care. We can still afford to put the substrate in and I'm calling a few people on my waitlist to see if they are interested in the new openings. Hopefully I can fill them quick with some chill parents!

I came to the realization that I have NO IDEA what allergy DCG is allergic to in my backyard, I could make all these changes (like rush it for them), and still have an issue and it's just not worth the time in my opinion. It's too bad they are really sweet girls and the ages that I love to work with :'(

[KidGrind]

I never enroll DCKs that DCMs or families are friends at the same time.

If a parent refers a family to me down the road fine. However to start them together….H3!! no!

[renodeb]

Nilla, I think you answered your own question. They sound like high maintenance clients. I know what a pain it is to fill spots ( as I am trying to fill some myself) but they do not sound worth all the heart ache to me. Kids will get dirty, wet, scraped up, stubbed toes. After all there kids!
Deb

[Stephnrich]

My response to the text would have been "I am sorry dck allergies are bothering her tonight, maybe my program is not a good fit for her as we do spend time outside each day". And then state your policy for teeming, refund or not and whether it is an immediate term or not.

Couldn't have said it better.

[NillaWafers]

Just a little update:
We've been inside the past two days because it's been 100+ (about 95 when we normally go out). Allergy DCG is still getting red eyes, coughing, and sniffles. I am pretty sure she MUST be allergic to our dog (which they knew was here when they signed up). She has had extensive allergy testing because of her peanut allergy, but allergies can show up anytime.

I am SO GLAD that we decided to terminate and today is their last day. Thank you all for your great advice