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Alrighty, so same DCG that I've talked about before. I decided to push through the *ick factor* of her constant reflux since mom was trying to work with me on it. Switched formula, talked to Dr. and all that. Now she seems to have come down with COLIC! She has cried NON STOP all day today, the only time she stops is when she is on the bottle or is asleep. The moment she wakes up she is crying and she cried herself to sleep AS I WAS HOLDING AND ROCKING HER! Oh, and now she MUST be held or she cried even harder (if that's really possbile :/) She finally passed out but I feel terrible for her. I just can't take this anymore though, between the reflux and now the crying it's near impossible to take care of any of the other children. I've decided to terminate today. Should I tell the mom why (I think it's probably obvious why though)?
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Poor babe and poor you!
I would just tell mom that your program is not a good fit for little one and you feel a nanny/one on one care would be a better fit. -
She suddenly has colic? Not likely...
Ear infection, changes in medication or formula, maybe. But, colic doesn't just suddenly appear out of nowhere.
:hug:
It really is ok to term! You provide GROUP care; you're not her parent and not her nanny.
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I feel I gave it a good try, she's been with me (2 days and 3 days alternating) for almost 2 months now. The only reason I stuck it out so long was because my own son had reflux really badly when he was little and I felt that it wouldn't be a good enough reason to terminate. He grew out of it pretty fast though and I wasn't taking care of other kids when he had it. It's gotten to wear I change my shirt up to three times a day because of soooo muuuuch puuuuke! And the smell makes me ill
This isn't the first time she has cried like this non-stop, last time she did this I had to call her mom to come get her I have suggested that she might need medicine but mommy doesn't really believe in it...she only gets vaccinated because I (and everyone else now) requires it or she wouldn't be in care. She has told me several times how much she dislikes vaccinations....whole different thing altogether, maybe I'll tell ya'll some of the crazy things she's said in a venting thread one day.
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Okay this is probably going to sound wrong but before this new issue, I thought good for you for giving this your all.
Now I am thinking...what are you doing? :confused:
This situation sounds like it's creating a lot more stress than it's worth. I'm sorry but I feel you have honestly done everything you can and personally, I'd be tapping out at this point. I know it ****s for the daycare mom but this is HER baby and you are a GROUP provider not a nanny.Comment
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Okay this is probably going to sound wrong but before this new issue, I thought good for you for giving this your all.
Now I am thinking...what are you doing? :confused:
This situation sounds like it's creating a lot more stress than it's worth. I'm sorry but I feel you have honestly done everything you can and personally, I'd be tapping out at this point. I know it ****s for the daycare mom but this is HER baby and you are a GROUP provider not a nanny.
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LOL, yes exactly! I am giving her two week notice today...I just hope she doesn't take it too badly since she only comes here part-time I believe she thinks I should just deal with it, which I did till now *sigh*. I'm printing out the notice right now. It says:Okay this is probably going to sound wrong but before this new issue, I thought good for you for giving this your all.
Now I am thinking...what are you doing? :confused:
This situation sounds like it's creating a lot more stress than it's worth. I'm sorry but I feel you have honestly done everything you can and personally, I'd be tapping out at this point. I know it ****s for the daycare mom but this is HER baby and you are a GROUP provider not a nanny.
"This is written notice of my intent to discontinue our child care services agreement. At this time I feel that I am unable to provide (DCG) with the level of care she needs. The last day I will be able to provide care is noted above. I am including the number to the local Child Care Resource & Referral to aid you in your search for more suitable care. I wish you both the best!"
How does that sound? I looked up the R&R number and also have a few numbers from other local providers that may be able to help her out.Comment
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You will feel a weight has lifted after you hand off that notice.
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If you are giving her 2 weeks you should really explain to dcm just how unhappy the baby is. I understand parents need to work and need daycare but is it really fair to have the baby come to you and cry all day? You may be able to get through it but its not fair to the baby.Comment
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I would not write that you are unable to care for the baby and then give notice that includes you caring for the baby.
I would just say that the baby needs are not conducive to group care. Please feel free to find alternative care immediately. If you are unable to find immediate care we will need a signed agreement that should the baby be having difficulty at daycare you will be notified and need to arrive within x minutes while you are searching for alternative care.Comment
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It may be too late if OP already gave the notice, but the way the term notice is written, it sounds like it's her fault, and it's not.
In a similar situation, I wrote something like that her needs were more than I could manage while still offering equal care to the other children in the group (I had volunteers come help while she was still here, and they knew this).Comment
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I already gave the notice, I understand it isn't the little girls fault at all! But rather some of the fault does lay with the mother...I asked during the initial interview if there were any healthy concerns I should know about and she denied anything. The first day I had DCG she was puking up all over the place so I thought maybe she was sick so I called the mom and she said "Oh, yeah she does that sometimes..."
But I thought, oh OK I can deal with that babies do get sick sometimes and my son had reflux for a while. But NOT like this! A few weeks later mom told me the Dr. said she had bad reflux....she didn't feel this was a "concern" to tell me about and that she required medicine but didn't want to give it to her! I've waited it out long enough. I just can't do it anymore Needless to say mom wasn't happy BUT she didn't seem surprised at all...
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Just to make it clear, Nan and I weren't saying you or the baby are at fault. Only that you should never claim that it IS your fault. The tone of your letter was trying to be nice, but insinuates it's your problem (you can't care for the baby). You didn't need to do that. Next time....I already gave the notice, I understand it isn't the little girls fault at all! But rather some of the fault does lay with the mother...I asked during the initial interview if there were any healthy concerns I should know about and she denied anything. The first day I had DCG she was puking up all over the place so I thought maybe she was sick so I called the mom and she said "Oh, yeah she does that sometimes..." But I thought, oh OK I can deal with that babies do get sick sometimes and my son had reflux for a while. But NOT like this! A few weeks later mom told me the Dr. said she had bad reflux....she didn't feel this was a "concern" to tell me about and that she required medicine but didn't want to give it to her! I've waited it out long enough. I just can't do it anymore Needless to say mom wasn't happy BUT she didn't seem surprised at all...Comment
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I disagree.
She (OP) said "At this time I feel that I am unable to provide (DCG) with the level of care she needs"
To me, that is a very true and accurate statement. It didn't read to me as the provider is at fault. To me, it literally means she is unable to provide the level of care the child requires.
Which is true so I guess I am not understanding what you are meaning...
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