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I'm not good with rejecting people so how do you tell a family that you don't think you are a good fit after a tour of your program? I'd like to know how to word it so they don't take it personally (if that's possible). Mainly it's the parents that I have a bad vibe from. TIA
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I know how you feel! One of the first parents I interveiwed gave me a bad vibe...she was really nice but seemed very reserved in her questions, very clipped in her replies to my questions and just had this general air of...well just ugh. I came here asking for advice too!
The BEST advice I received? Just be honest! Tell them you don't think it's a good fit and if they ask why you don't have to respond, your not required to give them a reason. If you're doing it by e-mail then that helps a bit. -
If you feel you need to elaborate at all just tell them with each new child comes a distinct change in dynamics of the whole group. While you enjoyed meeting them and their child very much, after much consideration you don't feel it would be a good fit for the whole group.
Good luck! This is such a personalized business, it's sometimes hard to know how to do things 'right' and the best way.Comment
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Keep it simple. Just tell them you don't think they are a good fit for your program. It has nothing to do with "liking" a person or "feelings". You choose the DCFs based on what is best for you and your program.Comment
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Whether it's true or not, I always make it sound as if I'm choosing from a group of candidates. "After conducting interviews for the available space, I have selected another family" or something to that effect. I think that sounds less like "I don't like you" and more like "I just like someone else better" :
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Whether it's true or not, I always make it sound as if I'm choosing from a group of candidates. "After conducting interviews for the available space, I have selected another family" or something to that effect. I think that sounds less like "I don't like you" and more like "I just like someone else better" ::
Yes this!
This works great and keeps things neutral and non-negotiable.Comment
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I just sent my first rejection letter a week or two ago. I was stressed about it, but in the end I sent something vague and polite, and she never responded.Comment
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I always do this too. Whether I have 7 interviews or just 1, I always tell them I will get back to them "after the other interviews are completed."Whether it's true or not, I always make it sound as if I'm choosing from a group of candidates. "After conducting interviews for the available space, I have selected another family" or something to that effect. I think that sounds less like "I don't like you" and more like "I just like someone else better" ::
I did have a dcm who I turned down in that manner because she seemed like a major control freak. She really wanted in, and asked to meet with me again, seeing if I would reconsider. She ended up being great. She is just very odd when you meet her.Comment
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I also do this...Whether it's true or not, I always make it sound as if I'm choosing from a group of candidates. "After conducting interviews for the available space, I have selected another family" or something to that effect. I think that sounds less like "I don't like you" and more like "I just like someone else better" ::
I tell them that I am looking for the best over all fit for our program and will be in touch.
I tell them that I am very selective in who I let into our program.
I need to make certain that the child will fit into our program. I tell parents that I am looking for several things. When they ask, these are a few things that I tell them.
We have a great community of friends here and we have a zero tolerance for violence policy. Of course that does not go with out saying that we dont have 2 year olds that hit out of frustration, but we are looking for a child that we know will flourish in our program. We are also looking for parents that understand our philosophy, rules and policies and will have no problems following them. As you can see, our program is unique and it's not for every family. Just as much as you are interviewing me, I am doing exactly the same to make sure that we have a long lasting stable business relationship. For a giggle I say, I never want to have to break-up with you guys....most of them laugh.
It's easy to find a way to say it in a light hearted way that they don't take personal, they know it's just the way that you do business.Comment
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I always tell parents that I am interviewing a number of families for the one spot and I will let them know by such-and-such-a date with my decision. That way, they don't feel as rejected and know that others also got a "no" and I didn't just single out THEIR family for rejection.
The one who gets "chosen" then feels more grateful and is more likely to follow rules when they know I have a choice of clients.
I find it also helps take the wind out of the sails of the bossy parents who think I should be happy they are interviewing me for a job. I make sure they know that I get to choose who comes into my house, not them.Comment
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What great advice! I will tell all prospective families that there are other applicants so they know I'm choosing them as much as they are choosing me. Turning down a family won't be as personal as well. Thank you all!Comment
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